Seeker 2x04 ‘Touched’ Cracky Recap
THEY CALLED THIS EPISODE ‘TOUCHED’ FOR A REASON, GUYS.
KAHLAN IS THE NIGHT WISPERER! They like her! (Or they're just really appreciative of her services to Shar that one time!)
CARA: …Have you been hiding all those shiny creatures in your corset all this time??
Hay, is that the tree from those season 1 promos? Hmm.
CARA: If Harry Potter steps out from behind that tree I'm leaving.
Can I not like the casting of Annabelle or will I get fan-slapped? She just doesn't quite look the part. She's very 21st century with her layered hair and fringe-bits.
Way to reference a fairy-tale, show. She even has the hair in a blonde braid.
She sends a homing Night Wisp to Kahlan!
Whoa. Hair. Bewbs. Lips. Glowy magic. Over-shoulder-boulder-holder strap. This cap is my happy place.
Also, this is me making a conscious effort to put in a Richard cap. I like the windswept look. It's cuz Kahlan BLOWS HIM AWAY.
I will NOT start making jokes about blowing. ...Just one?- No.
KAHLAN: She's in a tower.
LIKE RAPUNZEL? *facepalm*
KAHLAN: I wonder if she has longer hair than me?
CARA: *DOESN'T CARE*
ZEDD: *eat's everyone's share of the lembas bread*
ZEDD: …rid ourselves of extraneous cargo.
FLYNN: What did you call me?
LOL I love how Richard is like the popular kid splitting everyone up into teams.
RICHARD: I'll take these pretty people. The scary pornstar and the old man can go do the actual quest.
No one is particularly impressed with this plan.
1 and half days later, thanks to relative Dizney time… I always wonder what we miss when they do that.
I thought she looked familiar.
That cradle is rad. It's made from the same metal they smithed Kahlan's wonderbra from.
That has to be a smoke machine, right? Or a small forest fire.
DON'T TRUST HER, ANNABELLE!! Baaaad feeling!
OMG IS HE TAKING HER POWERS?! CAN THEY DO THAT TO KAHAN SO THERE CAN BE SEX? A;.DKG;AKDFG;ADFKG;ADF
(Is that the same thing they used on Zedd back in Elixir?)
OH HALE NO! (Preeetty.)
For an epic, ancient, untameable power, there's been a lot of mucking around Confessor's powers in this show.
Did everyone hear Craig's Aussie accent when he said ‘LET HER GO!’ Hee!
O_O Annabelle totally just skidded a metre on her chest. OUCH. Grass stains are a bitch when you don't have a washing machine.
He's got Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder!
ANNABELLE: Are you a prince?
FLYNN: If I say yes, will I get some sweet lovin'?
Just by-the-by: what do we know about Flynn? Is he a prince? Will be get backstory with him weren't expecting?
HAHA! Okay so we know accidental confession occurs when a Confessor ‘loses control’.
SO DID SHE JUST JIZZ IN HER PANTS JUST FROM TOUCHING HIS MANLY JAW??
Annabelle is going to have to die very hard before the ep is out. Flynn can't stay confessed!
ANNABELLE: You have dirt on your face.
KAHLAN: It's not my fault even nature wants to rub itself against me.
(Ps. Anyone else got the 720p? I swear I can hear it raining at the end of this scene!)
Where the hell did they get that perfect piece of A4?
LOL FLYNG NUNNNNNNNN.
(Hay hollywoodgrrl, Bitch Slap! Nuns! Lucy Lawless! Funtiems! That's where my brain went when I saw this scene.)
Why Cara, you look so edible in this light.
…Zedd not so much.
CARA: Oh, so they're afraid of the banelings. Not. Me. *Pointed. Words. Aimed. At. Zedd*
ZEDD: *hurrumph*
FLYNN: I'm going to get some more wood for the fire.
TRANSLATION: I need 15 mins of ‘alone time’.
KAHLAN: His love for me would be all-consuming. It would distract him so much he would go mad.
This little speech was so self-sacrificey and noble I almost cried. KAHLAN. BRIDGET. YOU GUYS.
LOL!! They're so gonna get caught with their pants down.
‘Bacon tastes goooood.’
Anyone else find Flynn's neck-scarf totally metro?
CARA: Do you honestly think that's why I followed Richard all this way?
FANDOM: Nuh uh! You're here for the R/K sexytiems like the rest of us!
Everything about Cara's composure screams SEX.
If I may repeat that thread I had w/ hollywoodgrrl earlier “Even when she's just standing in the background it's like she's trying to impregnate the cameraman with her body language alone!”
*stops breathing*
NOOOOOO!
RICHARD VS KAHLAN. I CAN'T BREATHE. SHE'S AMAZING.
Why no Con Dar though?
Cara's had it up to HERE with this sh*t. Meanwhile, Kahlan is deliciously dirty.
KAHLAN: I NEED A HOT BATH STAT, OR I'LL CON DAR ALL YOUR ASSES!
RICHARD: Don't kill Isabell, I love her!
CARA: Awkward.
Blah blah plot.
(I love how magic = amazing-sexy-wind-in-your-hair in The Midlands.)
THE TENSION. LOOK AT THE CAPS GUYS. Opposites attract!
CARA: Mord'Sith noogie, sucka! You'll take it and you'll like it!
Cara's totally had her way with Kahlan, and would like to show everyone precisely what a fine piece of ass she hit. Literally.
hjea sprouted this randomly great piece of meta last night about how she doesn't think Cara hates anyone in the trio: “Cara's pretty ambivalent. None of the Mord'Sith really seem to hate, except maybe Triana. They have a cause, and a master, and they do as ordered, but they don't hate their victims-you don't hate anyone who's lesser than you.”
I liked it, it seemed to nail Cara.
NO I WONT MAKE A JOKE ABOUT NAILING CARA. Oh, just one- no.
BEST CARA CAP OF ALL TIME!!
AUDIENCE: Umm. WHAT?! You want Richard to become Kahlan's love slave so they can have Conseeker babiez?!
KAHLAN: õ.O
Kahlan all nervous about her virginity and... well.
HE'S COMFORTING HER. COMFORT ME, RICHARD!
You should know this is when I started screaming. During the hair/hand sex.
Ok, peeps, question: Is it just me, or are Craig and Bridget displaying a much more chaste kissing technique than they did 12 months ago? Or maybe Kahlan's heart's not quite in it because of how Richard's confessed? Idk. The kisses are not what they once were!
WOW.
WHERE DID THIS SCENE COME FROM?! WHO CARES? THEY'RE MAKING LOVE ON A BED OF AUTUMN LEAVES!!!!
WATCH HER HANDS!! *crosses legs*
I think fairy-bliss said it best when she said “CANDLES CAN BE EASILY REPLACED WITH FERNS.”
HAHAHAHAAA.
CHOICE ORGASM CAP.
THE “KAHLAN IS ALWAYS ON TOP” CAP.
THE BACK GRAPPLING AND A+ FOR BEING ONE WITH NATURE CAP!
I LOVE MY HEROES GARNISHED WITH LEAVES!
KAHLAN: Like I said, it's not my fault even nature wants to rub itself against me.
KAHLAN: WHOA, ARE THOSE MINE?!
The strand of hair trying in vain to protect her modesty, LOL!
Excuse me Richard, I need to go have a talk with the wardrobe department.
Speaking of, there's been some discussion via fidesangelus about the corset not being the same as her regular corset. After looking at Revenant (for research purposes only!) I really can't make up my mind. The lower half is the part I'd assume they'd change to a fabric to allow more movement when sitting and flexing (AT THE PELVIS). It does look a little less leathery than Revenant, but it could be the lighting. Very amusing if it is a special sexytiems corset, and well spotted.
It's like all Cara ever does is angrily stuff her pack, and all Zedd does is eat. Hee!
RICHARD & KAHLAN: HAHA NO, THIS ISN'T EMBARRASSING AT ALL.
And of course, in the middle of any precious R/K conversation...
ZEDDICUS COCKBLOCKICUS: Whattup!
RICHARD: *sigh*
What is it, Cara? Why so intense? (She's actually gazing at Kahlan, standing directly behind us.)
Richard's found Captain Jack Sparrow's wonky compass!
CLOSED CAPTIONING FOR LEGEND OF THE SEEKER WAS SPONSORED B-
PS: SURPRISE! SEX!!
Browse the Legend of the Seeker
Cracky Recaps archive HERE
How does this show keep getting sexier? I thought it was impossible. And then Tabrett and Craig and especially Bridget just keep killing us with these increasingly spectacular performances. The MASSIVE UNSCHEDULED FANDOM EXCITEMENT this ep created has killed me dead. You are all beautiful, hilarious crazy people!
KAHLAN IS THE NIGHT WISPERER! They like her! (Or they're just really appreciative of her services to Shar that one time!)
CARA: …Have you been hiding all those shiny creatures in your corset all this time??
Hay, is that the tree from those season 1 promos? Hmm.
CARA: If Harry Potter steps out from behind that tree I'm leaving.
Can I not like the casting of Annabelle or will I get fan-slapped? She just doesn't quite look the part. She's very 21st century with her layered hair and fringe-bits.
Way to reference a fairy-tale, show. She even has the hair in a blonde braid.
She sends a homing Night Wisp to Kahlan!
Whoa. Hair. Bewbs. Lips. Glowy magic. Over-shoulder-boulder-holder strap. This cap is my happy place.
Also, this is me making a conscious effort to put in a Richard cap. I like the windswept look. It's cuz Kahlan BLOWS HIM AWAY.
I will NOT start making jokes about blowing. ...Just one?- No.
KAHLAN: She's in a tower.
LIKE RAPUNZEL? *facepalm*
KAHLAN: I wonder if she has longer hair than me?
CARA: *DOESN'T CARE*
ZEDD: *eat's everyone's share of the lembas bread*
ZEDD: …rid ourselves of extraneous cargo.
FLYNN: What did you call me?
LOL I love how Richard is like the popular kid splitting everyone up into teams.
RICHARD: I'll take these pretty people. The scary pornstar and the old man can go do the actual quest.
No one is particularly impressed with this plan.
1 and half days later, thanks to relative Dizney time… I always wonder what we miss when they do that.
I thought she looked familiar.
That cradle is rad. It's made from the same metal they smithed Kahlan's wonderbra from.
That has to be a smoke machine, right? Or a small forest fire.
DON'T TRUST HER, ANNABELLE!! Baaaad feeling!
OMG IS HE TAKING HER POWERS?! CAN THEY DO THAT TO KAHAN SO THERE CAN BE SEX? A;.DKG;AKDFG;ADFKG;ADF
(Is that the same thing they used on Zedd back in Elixir?)
OH HALE NO! (Preeetty.)
For an epic, ancient, untameable power, there's been a lot of mucking around Confessor's powers in this show.
Did everyone hear Craig's Aussie accent when he said ‘LET HER GO!’ Hee!
O_O Annabelle totally just skidded a metre on her chest. OUCH. Grass stains are a bitch when you don't have a washing machine.
He's got Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder!
ANNABELLE: Are you a prince?
FLYNN: If I say yes, will I get some sweet lovin'?
Just by-the-by: what do we know about Flynn? Is he a prince? Will be get backstory with him weren't expecting?
HAHA! Okay so we know accidental confession occurs when a Confessor ‘loses control’.
SO DID SHE JUST JIZZ IN HER PANTS JUST FROM TOUCHING HIS MANLY JAW??
Annabelle is going to have to die very hard before the ep is out. Flynn can't stay confessed!
ANNABELLE: You have dirt on your face.
KAHLAN: It's not my fault even nature wants to rub itself against me.
(Ps. Anyone else got the 720p? I swear I can hear it raining at the end of this scene!)
Where the hell did they get that perfect piece of A4?
LOL FLYNG NUNNNNNNNN.
(Hay hollywoodgrrl, Bitch Slap! Nuns! Lucy Lawless! Funtiems! That's where my brain went when I saw this scene.)
Why Cara, you look so edible in this light.
…Zedd not so much.
CARA: Oh, so they're afraid of the banelings. Not. Me. *Pointed. Words. Aimed. At. Zedd*
ZEDD: *hurrumph*
FLYNN: I'm going to get some more wood for the fire.
TRANSLATION: I need 15 mins of ‘alone time’.
KAHLAN: His love for me would be all-consuming. It would distract him so much he would go mad.
This little speech was so self-sacrificey and noble I almost cried. KAHLAN. BRIDGET. YOU GUYS.
LOL!! They're so gonna get caught with their pants down.
‘Bacon tastes goooood.’
Anyone else find Flynn's neck-scarf totally metro?
CARA: Do you honestly think that's why I followed Richard all this way?
FANDOM: Nuh uh! You're here for the R/K sexytiems like the rest of us!
Everything about Cara's composure screams SEX.
If I may repeat that thread I had w/ hollywoodgrrl earlier “Even when she's just standing in the background it's like she's trying to impregnate the cameraman with her body language alone!”
*stops breathing*
NOOOOOO!
RICHARD VS KAHLAN. I CAN'T BREATHE. SHE'S AMAZING.
Why no Con Dar though?
Cara's had it up to HERE with this sh*t. Meanwhile, Kahlan is deliciously dirty.
KAHLAN: I NEED A HOT BATH STAT, OR I'LL CON DAR ALL YOUR ASSES!
RICHARD: Don't kill Isabell, I love her!
CARA: Awkward.
Blah blah plot.
(I love how magic = amazing-sexy-wind-in-your-hair in The Midlands.)
THE TENSION. LOOK AT THE CAPS GUYS. Opposites attract!
CARA: Mord'Sith noogie, sucka! You'll take it and you'll like it!
Cara's totally had her way with Kahlan, and would like to show everyone precisely what a fine piece of ass she hit. Literally.
hjea sprouted this randomly great piece of meta last night about how she doesn't think Cara hates anyone in the trio: “Cara's pretty ambivalent. None of the Mord'Sith really seem to hate, except maybe Triana. They have a cause, and a master, and they do as ordered, but they don't hate their victims-you don't hate anyone who's lesser than you.”
I liked it, it seemed to nail Cara.
NO I WONT MAKE A JOKE ABOUT NAILING CARA. Oh, just one- no.
BEST CARA CAP OF ALL TIME!!
AUDIENCE: Umm. WHAT?! You want Richard to become Kahlan's love slave so they can have Conseeker babiez?!
KAHLAN: õ.O
Kahlan all nervous about her virginity and... well.
HE'S COMFORTING HER. COMFORT ME, RICHARD!
You should know this is when I started screaming. During the hair/hand sex.
Ok, peeps, question: Is it just me, or are Craig and Bridget displaying a much more chaste kissing technique than they did 12 months ago? Or maybe Kahlan's heart's not quite in it because of how Richard's confessed? Idk. The kisses are not what they once were!
WOW.
WHERE DID THIS SCENE COME FROM?! WHO CARES? THEY'RE MAKING LOVE ON A BED OF AUTUMN LEAVES!!!!
WATCH HER HANDS!! *crosses legs*
I think fairy-bliss said it best when she said “CANDLES CAN BE EASILY REPLACED WITH FERNS.”
HAHAHAHAAA.
CHOICE ORGASM CAP.
THE “KAHLAN IS ALWAYS ON TOP” CAP.
THE BACK GRAPPLING AND A+ FOR BEING ONE WITH NATURE CAP!
I LOVE MY HEROES GARNISHED WITH LEAVES!
KAHLAN: Like I said, it's not my fault even nature wants to rub itself against me.
KAHLAN: WHOA, ARE THOSE MINE?!
The strand of hair trying in vain to protect her modesty, LOL!
Excuse me Richard, I need to go have a talk with the wardrobe department.
Speaking of, there's been some discussion via fidesangelus about the corset not being the same as her regular corset. After looking at Revenant (for research purposes only!) I really can't make up my mind. The lower half is the part I'd assume they'd change to a fabric to allow more movement when sitting and flexing (AT THE PELVIS). It does look a little less leathery than Revenant, but it could be the lighting. Very amusing if it is a special sexytiems corset, and well spotted.
It's like all Cara ever does is angrily stuff her pack, and all Zedd does is eat. Hee!
RICHARD & KAHLAN: HAHA NO, THIS ISN'T EMBARRASSING AT ALL.
And of course, in the middle of any precious R/K conversation...
ZEDDICUS COCKBLOCKICUS: Whattup!
RICHARD: *sigh*
What is it, Cara? Why so intense? (She's actually gazing at Kahlan, standing directly behind us.)
Richard's found Captain Jack Sparrow's wonky compass!
CLOSED CAPTIONING FOR LEGEND OF THE SEEKER WAS SPONSORED B-
PS: SURPRISE! SEX!!
Browse the Legend of the Seeker
Cracky Recaps archive HERE
How does this show keep getting sexier? I thought it was impossible. And then Tabrett and Craig and especially Bridget just keep killing us with these increasingly spectacular performances. The MASSIVE UNSCHEDULED FANDOM EXCITEMENT this ep created has killed me dead. You are all beautiful, hilarious crazy people!