i woke to joy division blaring out my alarm clock. walked downstairs, turned on the tv, heard all the names being listed, and i began bawling. i think everything that happened and what could have happened finally, finally hit me. after penting up all my feelings and refusing to talk about it...i realized that my dad honestly could have died two ( Read more... )

sundays spent sleeping late are so joyful ( Read more... )

no shut eye until dawn ( Read more... )

first thing i did this morning when i finally woke up [after hitting snooze 6 times] was....BOOK MY TICKET TO ICELAND ( Read more... )

i woke up at 2:30
lots of dreams...hanging out with fab & nick on stage and kidding around...somewhere there was one about josh. i don't know.

i still feel a bit off.
maybe it's the sudden emergence of feelings after just attempting to just live and not think?

i've talked my mom into taking me to the mall. nothing like shopping.

And I wish ( Read more... )

in the 5th grade i was the only girl in my class who seemed to obessively listen to the radio, nirvana, pearl jam, hole, green day and the offspring were all i listened to and loved...most girls were too busy declaring their love for boys and stuff. i just remember talking to boys about what band was better than what other band and why. all these ( Read more... )

i am so sick of being indoors i think my head is going to explode from all the random thoughts running through my brain in the past 4 days. i think chris was going to invite me to go see the liar's tonight, which would have been nice [but probably awkward] but he didn't...he asked how i was feeling first. i thought it was nice of him ( Read more... )

slept only till 1:30 today, had a nice surprising visit from my uncle, i told him my boy complexities and he told me to take it step by step and be sure to think everything i do over. then started the fit of cleaning, swept & mopped downstairs, cleaned the cabinets and finally my dreadful room. my closest is actually neat! I am currently fixing ( Read more... )

so i decided to do absolutely nothing today. I think i manged to do just that quite well...slept till 1:30, bummed around talking to relatives that came over, fell asleep listening to the new B&S laying in bed with precious, woke up to Sigur Ros and my mom asking me if anything was wrong. Laid in bed listening to Sigur Ros some more with the ( Read more... )

this past weekend was one of the most tiring ones in a really long time ( Read more... )