Prison Realm
♥
I feel liek such a prisoner in this home.. I can;t live properly, well.. the way I want. And each day is as boring as the last ; I'd rather die then live another one like this. I gotta look both ways before opening something, before reading something, before doing anything I've planned. Everything seems wrong, here. Writing my thoughts down on a virtual diary and posting it via the net for everyone to seem is wrong. And being myself is wrong..
I have to pretend so much that sometimes I wander how it is like to feel real. How is it? It must feel wonderful, because lying to myself all the time isn't fun. Pretending to care hurts me. And I wish that this bullshit would stop.
The only time I can be myself is only when he is not around, or when she is not looking, or when they block their ears. I don't see what's wrong with the real me? I am a normal teen, I have my qualities and mistakes, but most of my friends appreciate me.. So why do I have to hide? Because if they see me, they'll trapt me in a smaller place with no air to breath.. A place where I will die, cut-off from this world I think I love..
Maybe they're overprotecting me. Or maybe it's hatred. Maybe they hate me so much that they think I don't deserve a shot, a chance at my own life.
♥
I feel liek such a prisoner in this home.. I can;t live properly, well.. the way I want. And each day is as boring as the last ; I'd rather die then live another one like this. I gotta look both ways before opening something, before reading something, before doing anything I've planned. Everything seems wrong, here. Writing my thoughts down on a virtual diary and posting it via the net for everyone to seem is wrong. And being myself is wrong..
I have to pretend so much that sometimes I wander how it is like to feel real. How is it? It must feel wonderful, because lying to myself all the time isn't fun. Pretending to care hurts me. And I wish that this bullshit would stop.
The only time I can be myself is only when he is not around, or when she is not looking, or when they block their ears. I don't see what's wrong with the real me? I am a normal teen, I have my qualities and mistakes, but most of my friends appreciate me.. So why do I have to hide? Because if they see me, they'll trapt me in a smaller place with no air to breath.. A place where I will die, cut-off from this world I think I love..
Maybe they're overprotecting me. Or maybe it's hatred. Maybe they hate me so much that they think I don't deserve a shot, a chance at my own life.
♥