Today, I met God
Okay I honestly don't know whether this was the right thing to do, but today during worship, thoughts came up to me one by one. haha I was really trying to focus okay, just that these things popped up to me all of a sudden. In a way, they helped me to look at life in a different perspective?
The whole thing surrounds the idea of how blessed I truly am. Not boasting, but just thankful for how much my God loves me =)
I retained, yes, but so? I can choose to be ashamed of myself, to think how foolish I am to retain for that reason and all, but honestly speaking, hahaha I gotta thank God that I'm slightly more optimistic than that =P
Living life a second time. It is a second chance at going back one year (in a way), amending my mistakes and to do what I haven't done. Actually, I wouldn't say I'm someone who's very optimistic so I'm not being too... you know, but I don't know, I guess I'm just really thankful that repeating a year wasn't as hard for me as it is for most other people? And I can say, I am satisfied now. I don't think I've ever felt as satisfied as I did as I look back at the previous year.
Well yes, telling people about it isn't easy, but hurhur, shall my life be about how people look at me? Shall I be feeling all sad and emo over that? Like what I once told Anne 2 years ago, if your friends love you, would this change your relationship with them? No.
Another thing has got something to do with what has been happening, especially recently. Talking about history repeating itself and all on my blog. But today I realised something.
Even if this is indeed history repeating itself with roles being reversed and my role being played by someone else, it's... actually not as bad as I think? Maybe, it isn't like some retribution or whatever? I actually learnt a lot and saw a lot through all this, and I think it's still happening. I used to not be able to understand why someone treats me a certain way, but now that I'm being placed in her shoes, I start to understand. I gotta say though, although I understand, it doesn't mean I approve of it. But I guess they helped me to appreciate her even more, and give me more and better reasons to defend her in my speech and in my thoughts. Afterall, logic isn't all to everything, that's what TOK says and I agree with. And I really think they helped me to evaluate the possible consequences of my actions, and put me in a better position to think. I guess history lessons are good this way like what they always say lol.
I have no idea what prompted _______ (shucks, what's his name!) to talk about looking at things through God's perspective. It wasn't even linked to the songs or the sermon I think? But I believe it's another blessing from God. When he said that, another thought came to my mind about another friend. I've been angry, I've been disappointed, and I've been so tired of trying that I wanted to just give up, but this afternoon God gently reminded me, who's going to love her? It's not the healthy who needs a doctor, and it's not the best who needs a friend and someone to love them. The question is, am I willing to be that friend?
Afterall, love is not self-seeking. (1 Cor 13:5) For some reason, this line was on my mind all the time throughout this whole day. Nothing else from the bible, but this. Even so, this thought came not as a result of thinking of God's words first, but it just came to me and I realised that it sounds too familiar, haha it's from the bible.
Last but not least, this song which I've heard many times but it never fails to touch me.
I see a generation
rising up to take [our] place
With selfless faith, with selfless faith
I see a near revival
stirring as pray and seek
We're on our knees, we're on our knees
Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me
Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am for Your Kingdom's cause
As I from earth into eternity
The whole thing surrounds the idea of how blessed I truly am. Not boasting, but just thankful for how much my God loves me =)
I retained, yes, but so? I can choose to be ashamed of myself, to think how foolish I am to retain for that reason and all, but honestly speaking, hahaha I gotta thank God that I'm slightly more optimistic than that =P
Living life a second time. It is a second chance at going back one year (in a way), amending my mistakes and to do what I haven't done. Actually, I wouldn't say I'm someone who's very optimistic so I'm not being too... you know, but I don't know, I guess I'm just really thankful that repeating a year wasn't as hard for me as it is for most other people? And I can say, I am satisfied now. I don't think I've ever felt as satisfied as I did as I look back at the previous year.
Well yes, telling people about it isn't easy, but hurhur, shall my life be about how people look at me? Shall I be feeling all sad and emo over that? Like what I once told Anne 2 years ago, if your friends love you, would this change your relationship with them? No.
Another thing has got something to do with what has been happening, especially recently. Talking about history repeating itself and all on my blog. But today I realised something.
Even if this is indeed history repeating itself with roles being reversed and my role being played by someone else, it's... actually not as bad as I think? Maybe, it isn't like some retribution or whatever? I actually learnt a lot and saw a lot through all this, and I think it's still happening. I used to not be able to understand why someone treats me a certain way, but now that I'm being placed in her shoes, I start to understand. I gotta say though, although I understand, it doesn't mean I approve of it. But I guess they helped me to appreciate her even more, and give me more and better reasons to defend her in my speech and in my thoughts. Afterall, logic isn't all to everything, that's what TOK says and I agree with. And I really think they helped me to evaluate the possible consequences of my actions, and put me in a better position to think. I guess history lessons are good this way like what they always say lol.
I have no idea what prompted _______ (shucks, what's his name!) to talk about looking at things through God's perspective. It wasn't even linked to the songs or the sermon I think? But I believe it's another blessing from God. When he said that, another thought came to my mind about another friend. I've been angry, I've been disappointed, and I've been so tired of trying that I wanted to just give up, but this afternoon God gently reminded me, who's going to love her? It's not the healthy who needs a doctor, and it's not the best who needs a friend and someone to love them. The question is, am I willing to be that friend?
Afterall, love is not self-seeking. (1 Cor 13:5) For some reason, this line was on my mind all the time throughout this whole day. Nothing else from the bible, but this. Even so, this thought came not as a result of thinking of God's words first, but it just came to me and I realised that it sounds too familiar, haha it's from the bible.
Last but not least, this song which I've heard many times but it never fails to touch me.
I see a generation
rising up to take [our] place
With selfless faith, with selfless faith
I see a near revival
stirring as pray and seek
We're on our knees, we're on our knees
Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me
Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am for Your Kingdom's cause
As I from earth into eternity