should i tell my bf about my one-night stand? (updated)
17/F dating 17/M.
My boyfriend and I have been going out for one month. The most we've done is quick kisses, which is frustrating to me since I enjoy kissing a guy and doing it often, along with everything that comes after that.
Anyways, my bf is out of town and on New Years' Eve I went and hung out with one of my best friends, her fiance, and their roommate Matt. We went out to dinner then came back a hung out, drank a little, etc. Well my friend and her fiance started to feel kind of crappy from the alcohol, so me and Matt left them in their room and hung out in his for a while. Earlier in the evening I'd heard him telling the fiance that he thought I was hot, etc and I certainly thought he was good-looking too. So we started messing around, which led to having sex--unprotected, b/c neither of us had a condom, but he pulled out before he came. We slept in together. The next morning was OK, no one seemed to care we'd had sex and Matt and I were really huggy and lovey and stuff. Eventually I went home.
Now I'm trying to get an over-18 friend of mine to get Plan-B morning after pill for me, just in case. The problem is that the over-18 friend of mine is also a really good friend of my boyfriend. I don't think she'll tell him or anything, but it makes me wonder if I should tell him or not. I don't want there to be secrets between us, but I also don't know how my boyfriend would take it. But I can't help but think that if I weren't going out with my boyfriend, I'd definitely be interested in Matt. So I'm confused about what to do.
Edit:Well the decision was made for me. I was trying to find the right way to tell him and finally decided that I ought to do it in person, but... The mutual friend who I told about it apparently told my boyfriend, because he asked me if I'd done anything with anyone on New Years' Eve. I wasn't going to lie, I told him yes I had. He got really pissed off and basically said he couldn't forgive me because if he forgave me now what would stop me from going out and doing it again. No matter how much I told him I was sorry and hadn't planned it and wasn't even sure if I wanted to do it even when I was doing it, he basically said he didn't care and couldn't forgive me.
I could live with that, but then it got worse. He started calling me a slut and a whore, and posted three copies of the same bulletin on MySpace telling everyone the story, and said something to the effect of "why don't i write your mother on myspace and tell her her daughter is probably pregnant? wouldn't that be hilarious?", and went and hung out with his ex-girlfriend despite the fact that he doesn't like her like that anymore, just to piss me off. I don't blame him for being pissed off but now we're just descending to the childish and hurtful.
My boyfriend and I have been going out for one month. The most we've done is quick kisses, which is frustrating to me since I enjoy kissing a guy and doing it often, along with everything that comes after that.
Anyways, my bf is out of town and on New Years' Eve I went and hung out with one of my best friends, her fiance, and their roommate Matt. We went out to dinner then came back a hung out, drank a little, etc. Well my friend and her fiance started to feel kind of crappy from the alcohol, so me and Matt left them in their room and hung out in his for a while. Earlier in the evening I'd heard him telling the fiance that he thought I was hot, etc and I certainly thought he was good-looking too. So we started messing around, which led to having sex--unprotected, b/c neither of us had a condom, but he pulled out before he came. We slept in together. The next morning was OK, no one seemed to care we'd had sex and Matt and I were really huggy and lovey and stuff. Eventually I went home.
Now I'm trying to get an over-18 friend of mine to get Plan-B morning after pill for me, just in case. The problem is that the over-18 friend of mine is also a really good friend of my boyfriend. I don't think she'll tell him or anything, but it makes me wonder if I should tell him or not. I don't want there to be secrets between us, but I also don't know how my boyfriend would take it. But I can't help but think that if I weren't going out with my boyfriend, I'd definitely be interested in Matt. So I'm confused about what to do.
Edit:Well the decision was made for me. I was trying to find the right way to tell him and finally decided that I ought to do it in person, but... The mutual friend who I told about it apparently told my boyfriend, because he asked me if I'd done anything with anyone on New Years' Eve. I wasn't going to lie, I told him yes I had. He got really pissed off and basically said he couldn't forgive me because if he forgave me now what would stop me from going out and doing it again. No matter how much I told him I was sorry and hadn't planned it and wasn't even sure if I wanted to do it even when I was doing it, he basically said he didn't care and couldn't forgive me.
I could live with that, but then it got worse. He started calling me a slut and a whore, and posted three copies of the same bulletin on MySpace telling everyone the story, and said something to the effect of "why don't i write your mother on myspace and tell her her daughter is probably pregnant? wouldn't that be hilarious?", and went and hung out with his ex-girlfriend despite the fact that he doesn't like her like that anymore, just to piss me off. I don't blame him for being pissed off but now we're just descending to the childish and hurtful.