TVD 3x20: Sorry to spoil your seven minutes in heaven...with the rest of the episode.

[dante_kent]

Hmm. Let's see. I don't really know what to say about this episode. My mind keeps swinging between fury, righteous anger, and total indifference. After the glory of 3x19 last week in all its 10k monstrosity-inducing, flail-worthy excellence, I always knew 3x20 was going to be a letdown. I also knew that it was going to be a rough episode for me in general, because the more I heard about it the more discouraged I became about what this episode was going to turn out to be. I...was not wrong. To be fair, it wasn't as bad as I expected it to be. But it wasn't good.

So allow me to talk out my issues ad nauseum, for your reading pleasure. Perhaps by the end of this recap, I'll know a bit better how I feel. Because right now, I feel pretty jaded and blasé about the whole thing.


I'm pretty sure the happiest I felt throughout the entire episode was during the previously's. Tell me you don't feel something for him, cue glorious makeout scene, I seal-clap for a second and pronounce "Win!" to my empty living room. And that was the end of the enthusiasm. #OTP state of mind

The scene opens with Klaus. Painting. I literally had to pause my recording immediately and exclaim "You're KIDDING me." Just. Seriously, guys, this has to be a joke. I am nearly positive that the writers are just trolling the internet and playing us for the lolz, because seriously? RIDICULOUS.

And what is that painting, even? Angry impressionism? I am 100% sure this is a joke. Can't even.

RebekEsther (did we ever decide what her name was? Doesn't matter, she lasted for all of 3 minutes) enters the scene and refrains from making any comment on Klaus's absurd art. This should have been his first clue something was up.

A brief pause to say, Claire Holt is wonderful. She does a very subtle but effective job of doing Esther playing Rebekah. She lacked the sparkle I'm accustomed to with her, which was clearly a choice, since Claire is usually effortlessly charming. I was scouring her performance, and there was nothing overtly un-Rebekah-ish about RebekEsther - she was saying all the right things, acting the part fairly well. But she had this flatness to her that made the whole thing very convincing. Nice work, my Australian queen. (Please stay forever.)

Klaus throws the stake into the fire with little to no ceremony, and I have to say, I would have expected more from him, what with his flair for the dramatic (after all, he's painting all through this scene - PAINTING. Yeah.). But I suppose his refusal to delay the destruction of the one weapon he thinks can kill him is the sort of actual supervillain behavior that's kept him alive for a thousand years, so, carry on, Klaus. You may continue to be inexplicably effective.

Not gonna lie, part of me (the RebeKlaus-shipping part) was hoping Klaus would notice something was off about Rebekah, because you know me, I never miss an opportunity to ship (I was literally thinking earlier today that there is just no way the writers don't intend for Klaus and Rebekah to be understood as in love. Simply no way at all.). But I can find RebeKlaus anywhere, because even if Klaus fails the test, he still acquiesces to almost-Rebekah's request to go to a high school dance, just because she wants to go. That's love, man. This guy has no interest in high school, bless him. He just wants to make her happy. My shipper heart beams.

Damon and Alaric chat on the phone, and I don't believe for a second that it's normal Ric. Did anyone? Yeah, didn't think so.

OH, I just noticed something! Even rewatching not good episodes can give me new tidbits of happiness. Alterlaric (I'm not giving this name up, people) tells Damon there was no sign of Rebekah when he woke up, and Damon just goes, "Lovely." My mind goes into a frenzy of overidentification, because 'lovely' is one of my most overused words, and sometimes Damon and I are just exactly the same person. This should probably worry me. And yet, I regret nothing.

The phone call is largely uninteresting, save Damon's derision of the proposed spirit quest. Plus his "working things out" face after he hung up, which you all know gets me going in all the best ways. But other than that, ok, it happened.

Let's just get one thing out of the way. Damon was golden in this episode, because Damon is pretty much always golden. He was one of the only things about this episode that didn't once make me roll my eyes or sigh in resignation or dismay at one point or another. Unfortunately, he was barely in this episode, so he may have been typically perfect, but even he couldn't save the episode. #shameless Damon stan is shameless

And while we're on the subject of unrepentantly stanning Damon, I'll say that upon rewatch I can appreciate the fact that Alterlaric makes a point to say that "Damon's too arrogant to think his only friend would betray him," and he's wrong. He's actually underestimating Damon and his intelligence. But Damon-stanning aside, it's a nice touch, because it speaks to the generalizing disdain Alterlaric feels toward all vampires, which is ultimately proven to be unfounded. Subtle, and I like it.

So RebekEsther gets almost immediately reversed, and I have to wonder, what was the point of all that? Did Esther really need to possess Rebekah just to get Alterlaric to show her the location of the stake? Couldn't she just have gone to him in her own body as she did in Rebekah's and reveal that she's on his side? Someone explain this to me. Unless it's just that the show desperately wanted the superior skills of the actress playing Esther back on our screen. (Answer: LOL. No.)

I am so ridiculously attached to Rebekah that I was even dismayed when her body got stabbed. Leave my girl alone! I was indignant on her behalf.

The dance set up was cute. Until is wasn't. But let's stick with the cute for now. Caroline used the word 'monstrosity,' which you all know I'm immensely fond of. I am very proud of this show's vocabulary sometimes. Caro's horror at Matt and Jeremy and their lack of design skills was adorable. "You can't just hang them!" As a girl who used to force her boys to help her hang up Christmas decorations in her college dorm room, I can sympathize, Caro. Been there. Sometimes boys just don't get interior design. Meanwhile, any overt references to bromance make me happy, so A+ for that. And...that's the end of the good stuff.

We're going to take the rage in stages. So let's start with the lesser cause of annoyance: the triangle that really ought to be dead but keeps being subtly referenced just in case. The Caroline/Matt/Tyler triangle of doom (yes, the core OT3 is called this all the time, but hey, at least I signed up for that one). Textually, there is nothing left in this triangle. Caroline's with Tyler, and that's that. But they keep putting in little moments of Caroline/Matt, and I do not like it. Caroline has that beat when she looks all impressed and vaguely dreamy that Matt got Jeremy his job at the Grill again, and I just *facepalm* a little, because, yes, Matt is a nice guy. We can all appreciate him. But I hate this feeling that they're just waiting to spring Matt on either Elena or Caroline at any second. We have too many romantic quadrilaterals already. Can't we just leave this well enough alone? Honestly, I'm over Caroline and ALL romance at this point (why couldn't the three of them have just gone as girl dates? THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED.).

And now we get to the rant that's been building for literal months. We need to talk about Caroline. I think most of us would agree that Caroline's character has taken a hit this season. After the unbelievably wonderful growth and awesomeness of Caro and her new vampire storyline in Season 2, this season has fallen flat in terms of both Caroline's function and characterization. That's a rant for another day, but I need to complain about this: Caroline's role in the Stefan arc. What role, you may ask? Valid. She was a complete non-entity in the Ripper arc, which was a waste of an opportunity, and, frankly, out of character. But again, rant for another day. What I NEED to rant about is the way Caroline's treating Elena in regards to Stefan, and the way she's dealing with Stefan in general. So Stefan's good again, fine. Whatever, it's cool, I'm over it. But my resentment over this issue goes back to 3x14, to that stupid fucking offhand comment during Caroline and Elena's conversation about the Originals ball. I don't even remember exactly what they said, but at some point Caroline says that if Elena needs a Salvatore to take her to the ball, Stefan is clearly the better option. And the way she said it, like it was so obvious, like Elena was a fool for even questioning that, made me RAGE. This happened two episodes after the Wickery Bridge incident, after an entire season of Stefan first abandoning and rejecting Elena, then outright abusing her. This was before Stefan had made even the slightest steps toward recovery. There was virtually no reason to have any faith in Stefan anymore, because the Stefan that was around in 3x14 was very much the Ripper Stefan that they'd all been Other-ing in the first place. So...how could Caroline be so judgmental about Elena doubting him? HOW could she even think for a second that Stefan would be an even vaguely suitable escort to the ball? He'd made it more than clear that he had no interest in anything but revenge at that point. And yes, it was more complicated than that, and we know that Stefan was posturing and acting and generally self-sabotaging. But frankly, that doesn't matter, because Caroline didn't know that. All she knew was what she'd seen, which was Stefan being unbearably horrible to her best friend. So she had no place trying to influence Elena thus, and she was being a terrible friend by doing so.

But fine, that's in the past. Fine. Except then we have this. Caroline entreating Elena to give Stefan a chance, because he deserves it. I just. WHAT. My horror and fury about this have been steadily building since I read the synopsis of the episode, and the reality is no less vile. I honestly can't pick what to rage about first. EVERYTHING about this was the worst. Just.

To get the obvious out of the way, I am utterly *headdesk* about the idea of it being Stefan's 'turn.' So, so many problems with this. First of all, how is it Stefan's turn? Elena was with him for MONTHS. She made out with Damon...once. This does not seem like sound logic to me. In fact, this might be the OTP glasses talking, but it seems to me like it's still Damon's turn, and ought to be for a rather long time, because even when Elena wasn't technically with Stefan she was still all about Stefan. It's terrible math, to be honest. But all that is irrelevant anyway, because the very idea of 'turns' makes me ill. This is VILE. First of all, it implies that Elena owes these boys something, which, no, absolutely not. Elena doesn't owe the Salvatores a damn thing. If she wants to be with one of them, great, power to her. But it's her call. She doesn't have to test them both out out of some obligation to them. She doesn't HAVE to be with either of them, and the only reason for her to decide upon one of them is if it makes her happy. This concept of turns is horrifying, especially because it makes the idea of Elena's choice...not about her. In which case, what's the fucking point of choosing. Why don't they all just stay apart then?

Next up, let's discuss how any burden of actual choosing between the Salvatores is being placed on her by other people. The way I see it, Elena's free right now. Yes, Stefan and Damon both love her, and yes, she loves them both too. But she's not with either of them. She isn't even encouraging either of them. Motel makeout session aside, she's done nothing even vaguely romantic with either of these boys for ages. It's not like she's stringing them along here. She's just single, and that's fine. So why is it suddenly so important that she makes a choice? Season finale rules, I get it. But that's outside the show knowledge. Meanwhile, within the text, it's just Stefan and Caroline suddenly putting all this pressure on Elena. The only reason I can think of for this is that Stefan is finally healthy enough to be with her again, which means that, as usual, their entire romantic relationship runs on his schedule. When he can't handle being with her, she has to just deal with it. But once he's ready again, she needs to get over herself and make a choice, because he's waiting. Which. Just. I can't even express my rage over this. But beyond that, WHAT THE FUCK IS CAROLINE DOING? Listen, I love the Stefan/Caroline friendship beyond reason. I've regularly pleaded for the show to bring this back, because it was wonderful. But this? Is not the way to do it. In fact, this is actively ruining Caroline's character for me, because in the interest of being a good friend to Stefan, she is being a terrible friend to Elena. Elena should be Caroline's first priority. This is a fact. They have been best friends their whole lives, and Caroline owes her far, far more loyalty than she owes to Stefan. Furthermore, Elena needs Caroline more. Elena needs support and protection and love, because her relationship with Stefan has been pretty toxic at times, and she needs people in her corner. This is what Caroline should be. Instead, Caroline is proudly wearing her Team Stefan shirt, regardless of what Elena wants or needs. This isn't support. This is fucking peer pressure. Which. What even? Why are you ruining this friendship, show? Why are you ruining Caroline???

Meanwhile, even Caroline is letting Stefan call all the shots. Let's talk about this: "You're supposed to be figuring out what you want. That's what Stefan wanted you to do, right?" Um. GROSS GROSS GROSS. Stefan wants Elena to sort out her own feelings, so naturally, that's what she has to do. Stefan demands it, and thus it must be law. Never mind what Elena wants. Never mind if she has no desire to figure things out right now. It's not about her, apparently. Her own feelings and desires? Not about her. And Caroline is VALIDATING this. She is defending Stefan and the way he's been dictating Elena's life. She is supporting this disgusting patriarchal behavior, and for what? For her romance novel agenda? Never once does Caroline ever ask Elena what she actually wants. Instead, she just guilts Elena into doing what she thinks Elena should do. And that's what this is. Guilt. Caroline is setting up this fucked up points system in which what Elena does for one brother, she must do for the other. Though, only if that benefits Stefan, naturally. If the scales are tipped in Damon's way, that must be immediately remedied. But if they're swinging in Stefan's favor, good, all is right with the world, we can all move on. I'm disgusted by this, and not on a D/E shipping level. I'm just horrified by the fact that, again, Caroline doesn't seem to care what Elena wants. She has an idea of what should happen, and she's manipulating the situation to fit that, to the detriment of her friend. The best part of the Elena/Damon/Stefan triangle is Elena's arc within it, the way she's figuring out what she wants and who she wants to be through them. So, honestly? Caroline has no part in this. Get the fuck out, Caroline. This is not. about. you.

Next up, this piece of grossness: "I'm sorry, but Stefan is your Epic Love. I'm not going down without a fight." Just. I literally fake vomited on the floor when she said this, like a fucking adolescent boy or something. That is how much this entire scene made me incoherent in my rage. First of all, SERIOUSLY, SHOW? EPIC LOVE? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? I have a zillion and one problems with Epic Love, and there isn't enough time in the world for me to go through even a fraction of them here. I do not believe that Stefan/Elena is an Epic Love Story, nor do I even believe that Epic Love Stories exist. But that's besides the point. What IS on point is that Caroline is using this absurd romantic cliche to con Elena into doing what Caroline wants her to do. She's emphasizing this outdated teenage fantasy version of S/E, COMPLETELY IGNORING THIS ENTIRE SEASON. I'm sorry, Caroline, but remind me, what is so epic about Stefan tormenting and traumatizing Elena? How epic was it when he failed to apologize in any way until it seemed like she might actually be moving on from him? I'm not Stefan bashing right now, honestly. I have problems with the way Stefan has been handled this season (understatement), but that's not the point. The point is that Caroline is flat out wrong. She is actively encouraging her best friend to reconcile with her abusive boyfriend. I can't even vaguely comprehend this. I want to get more rage!flail-y, but I just can't find the words. Vile, from start to finish.

And as for the second part of that quote, I'm not going down without a fight? HOW IS THIS ABOUT YOU, CAROLINE? This is not her battle. This has nothing to do with her. She's inserting herself into this situation and getting in Elena's head, removing any sort of Elena's agency. She's making this about her, and I just can't. I cannot handle it. Go home and watch the fucking Bachelor on your own, Caroline. You can't dictate Elena's love life like a GAME. This is your friend, and she needs you to support her no matter what - she does NOT need you to complicate the issue with your own clearly partisan agenda.

I just. I can't even with this. My mind has actually run out of words and is just a seething haze of rage. There are probably a million more things I meant to talk about regarding this epic, epic fail (you want to talk about epic? THAT is epic), but I'm  just spent. Fuck this. Fuck this whole damn thing to hell and back.

I want to make one thing clear: I don't blame Elena for this. She is confused and terrified and traumatized, and she has no idea what to do. She's susceptible to the influence of people like Stefan and Caroline, because she's worn down and anxious and she just wants to make her people happy, and these are her loved ones, telling her what to do to make everyone happy. She's going along with it, because she's searching for clarity, and she's weak to their impassioned advances right now. They are literally taking advantage of her. Which makes me all the more disgusted. Elena needs them more than ever, and they're letting her down.

Elena-stan to the end: "And you're not biased or anything." POWER TO YOU, MY GIRL. She tried, bless her.

Ughhhhhhhh and now I have to deal with the actual asking out. I am too furious already. This episode is not good for my health.

Oh, but some scene analysis, because there's no way this wasn't intentional. Elena calls Stefan to ask him to a fucking high school dance, of all things, and when the camera cuts to her, she's sitting right by this photo of her, Bonnie, and Caroline, the frame boldly emblazoned with "MEMORIES." True story, go check. This is very obvious, though very valid - this entire exercise is Elena acting out of nostalgia, trying to hold true to the memories of what she and Stefan once were. This is her trying to get back to a time when her feelings made a little more sense. I'm of a mind that this can't be done, but hey, 3x19 soldered my OTP glasses to my face, I can't be trusted anymore.

And this might be those partisan spectacles talking, but it seemed to me that Elena did NOT want to do this. She seemed so uncomfortable on the phone with Stefan. I got all indignant when she asked so hesitantly if he had a sec to talk to her. It made me feel so keenly the power imbalance between them - she's anxious asking him for something, because she's so used to him calling all the shots. She doesn't feel like she has the right to demand anything of him, not even a phone call. Maybe this is me being oversensitive. But none of it felt right to me.

And here's a bit of perhaps unwarranted harshness to the younger Salvatore, but did anyone else think he looked super smug after she asked him to the dance? Like, his face made me angry. I love you, Stefan, I do. But get the fuck out of this storyline before it takes us all down.

And can we just talk about the utter absurdity of these two going to a HIGH SCHOOL DANCE to reconcile their problems? LOL, never mind, they seem to have no intention of actually dealing with their problems. But still, the setting is patently ridiculous, and that probably should have been the point, but at no point in this episode was it ever addressed that these two delude themselves so heavily about their relationship. It makes me despair about the overarching narrative of S/E. If they even have one, really.

(Side note of self absolution: I know I'm being really harsh on Stefan/Elena in this recap. Generally, I make a very concerted effort to stay vaguely objective (I know, LOL) in my recaps, because as much as I am a helpless D/E shipper, I really do try to see all sides of the argument. I'm never going to ship S/E, but I can appreciate the good things the show does with them. That being said, I'm having trouble remembering what those good things are, because their entire arc this season has been such a clusterfuck of wrong, inexplicable, and outright vile, and I'm just exhausted with trying so hard to make it ok. The show has lost its way with Stefan/Elena, and I honestly don't know what they can do to fix it at this point. My railing against them in this recap has nothing to do with my desire to see Elena with Damon. But if I'm honest, it DOES have a lot to do with 3x19, because the D/E in that episode gave me incontrovertible evidence that this show does know how to construct a nuanced, brave, anti-cliché, psychologically fascinating, gorgeous romantic narrative, but they're just...not doing that with S/E. So I'm not judging S/E because D/E is my OTP. I'm judging S/E to the standard that the show itself set with its flawless construction of the Damon/Elena relationship that it is failing to meet with S/E, and I think that's fair.)

But as much as I hate every. single. thing. about the S/E disaster happening right now, I do love me some shattered Damon, so when the boy showed up at the end in all his snarky bravado-to-conceal-my-crushing-heartache glory, it tickled my fancy, because I do so court pain. So my beautiful boy (looking beautiful, obviously) does his thing, and I just go "OWOWOWOWOWWWWW GOOD." I love this kind of misery, tbh. To paraphrase Alex, I am cruel to my favorites.

Props to my boy, though: he doesn't overdo it (and neither does the show - HOW DO YOU MAKE SUCH GOOD CHOICES WITH DAMON AND SUCH TERRIBLE CHOICES ABOUT EVERYTHING ELSE???). His comment is pointed and edging toward dangerous territory, but it isn't Damon having a breakdown or throwing a fit, because that's not who he is. He reacted to the S/E in this episode in much the way I expected he would: he got a little colder, a little meaner, and mostly just kept to himself. He's not going to throw a temper tantrum and rage at Stefan and Elena for treating him so poorly. Instead, he's going to get a dig in here or there, and then retreat into himself while acting the part of Damon he has so perfected, because that's how he survives.

And then he goes and acts like a dick to Meredith, because he copes by being the irreverent douchebag Damon that everyone expects him to be. Also, it's fun, so there's that. And yes, Damon, you using your silly vampire tricks to scare Meredith is a little funny. But I am biased, so you probably shouldn't trust me.

Is Matt Davis really 6'2? I'm so used to actors being short, it fascinates me when they're tall.

Guys. You know my Smart Damon kink. YOU ARE WONDERFUL, MY CLEVER BOY. I think my Damon stan is coming out extra hard today to counteract the grr of the rest of the episode. But Damon figures things out, as he does, and I delight in the hotness of it all.

OF COURSE the mystically endowed location is the Salvatore mausoleum. Is anyone even in that thing? Whatever. I'm at the point where even seeing the Salvatore name in print makes me happy. Whenever I drive past the Ferragamo shop, I get tingles.

So glad to have this actress playing Esther back. #sarcasm

I have to say, I was actually very intrigued by the ring/stake twist. Using the protective magic of the invincibility ring to make the stake indestructible is sort of an awesome (and logical and effective!) idea, and I was actually a little impressed. Well done, show. This worked.

Why do people always have to drop things into cauldrons and/or goblets from great heights? Why couldn't Esther just have placed the ring into the cup gently? Ah well.

The ring coating the stake looked awesome, I'll give you that. But I couldn't help but think that this was a glorified Bedazzling.

Fashion commentary of the episode: I've got to say, I don't think the 20s is the best era for our girls. Don't get me wrong, they always look beautiful. But both Elena and Caroline did not look as stunning as they normally do during dances. This was not the most flattering look for them. The exception? Bonnie! She looked so freaking gorgeous in this ep. She made a fantastic flapper. Everything about her was adorable, and I think the whole outfit/hair/ensemble really suited her. #sometimes I'm very much a girl

But do I even need to LOL at how all the Mystic Falls high school students have super nice, period appropriate garb for the 20s (commonly sold at the Gap near you!)? Shall we say it together? What are you even, Mystic Falls.

Sorry, one more fashion commentary: all the boys, however, looked FINE in their 20s gear. I have a thing for guys in vests. Also, Stefan rocks a good suit. And Damon is Damon in his leather and jeans, but I am me, and I am helpless to it. Carry on, Damon. CARRY ON, WELL-DRESSED MALES.

Perhaps this is me seeing what I want to see, but it seemed to be that Elena actively put on her Stefan's Elena character after a second. She answers the door, looks all nervous for a sec, then does her little "You look very dapper" line, and something about the way she delivered it just rang so strongly of early season 2. It felt like she was trying on the role again, and it got easier for her to keep it up as time went on, because he picked up his old persona too. But even if it's a comfortable costume, it's still a costume.

Ok, someone who knows anything about flowers, tell me: is that a gardenia that Stefan gives Elena? Probably not. But boy, would that be awesome if it were. #my lack of flower knowledge getting in the way of my show interpretation

They keep looking at each other like so, and I'm probably supposed to find it romantic, but I can't do anything but roll my eyes. I can't even with this resumption of the trite romantic S/E without even vaguely dealing with anything that's happened this season between them. Sorry, show, but I'm too tired to even pretend I care about this anymore.

Stefan brings up the very valid point that they have a truly wretched dance record, and he asks if they should even be going to this. NO, STEFAN. YOU SHOULD NOT BE GOING TO THIS. HAVE YOU PEOPLE LEARNED NOTHING? Team Mystic Falls, Inexplicably Still Alive Since 2009.

Stefan and Elena have a callback to what they once were, and honestly, it's not unpleasant. But you know what it made me think? That these two, someday, could be good friends. That's what I want. A Stefan/Elena friendship based on their shared history together. This cute high school romance business? Do not want. This is not the time for it, and the show is ruining any chance at a relationship of equals between these two by rushing the romance again.

The decade dances always look super fun. I know Mystic Falls isn't your average town, but my high school dances were pretty much just a bunch of teenagers clustered awkwardly in a dark gym to terrible music. Is an awesome social council worth the low life expectancy of your average Mystic Falls High School student? You be the judge.

The first thing I thought of when we get to the dance is that I love the song that's playing. I loved ALL the music they played at the dance. Let's be honest, the music was the best part of this episode. Yes? Yes.

Matt/Caroline rears its ugly head again, but I can at least appreciate that Matt is rocking the 20s look (what is he, the driver at Downton Abbey? I'm cool with it). But dude, is he STILL bussing tables at this thing? He's in charge of the ice or something? LOL FOREVER. Poor Matt.

So I don't even know what to do with this conversation. I'm not quite sure what they intended with it, but all the options seem unfortunate. Either this is Caroline acting jealous and keeping the dream of Matt/Caroline alive, or it's Matt/Elena being kept alive for our future viewing pleasure. Whatever it might be, it IS Caroline getting needlessly involved in something, and it's all foolish. I don't know what the show is doing with Caroline, but they need to stop.

Tyler shows up, and it's idiotic, but whatever. I don't even care anymore. At least Tyler flat out admits that he's both jealous and competitive. It doesn't make this storyline interesting to me, but points for being forthright, Mr. Lockwood.

Stefan and Elena arrive at the dance, and sure, fine, they're vaguely cute. But again, in a sort of friendship-y way. Can't they just be like that for a while? Answer: no. Because instead, we get this STUPID moment when they're dancing and the song suddenly slows. Seriously? Come the fuck on. The typical high school romance tripe LEAPS out at you. Ughhhhhh this. It was awful. And FUCK, I love this song. Stop trying to ruin things for me, show! I resented this immensely.

LOL at all of Bonnie's romantic development happening off screen. I can't even with this. Whatever.

But while we're on the subject of romantic clichés, seriously, Stefan? "If you and I find our way back to each other?" BLEGH. Gross. #i really hate lines that most people find super romantic #gut reaction of nausea #off to rip out a heart to cleanse myself

I'm seriously exhausted already from all my raging, but I need to complain briefly about this: Elena wants to confess about what happened with Damon in Denver (which she has no obligation to do, but this is Elena, and she does these things, regardless of whether I think she should), and Stefan DOESN'T LET HER. Elena wants to unburden herself, because she's supposed to be working things out with these two boys and she wants to be honest with them (them being Stefan, obviously), and Stefan doesn't want to hear it. He doesn't want to know. Until he knows if he's won, he doesn't want to deal with whatever pain her declaration might cause. Cowardly, and selfish, and I do not approve of this behavior, Stefan Salvatore.

But worst of all: "How can you be so fair about this?"

............

NO. WHAT? JUST. NO.

Ughhhhhhh this was the absolute worse. Because, fair? Stefan is not even remotely fair right now! He's playing her, and she's buying it without question. Just. I can't. It is fucking CANON that Stefan has an agenda. He needs to get back with Elena to make his quest for redemption worthwhile. I'm not saying that makes his love and desire to be with Elena inauthentic, because they're not. But Stefan is not being altruistic here. He's doing what he needs to do to win, essentially (yes, the competition vocabulary is gross, but that's how he's framing it, so that's what I'm going with). So Elena praising him on his fucking generosity and understanding behavior? NO. GROSS. TOO GROSS. I cannot cope. Just. No.

And then this is followed up by Stefan's pathetic placating statement about 'all he's put her through.' This is the worst. Because throughout the episode, and really throughout the season, any apology Stefan utters is just him saying "I've done such terrible things to you, so I deserve this or that or whatever." But...this isn't an actual apology. It sounds like one, in a way, and Elena takes it as one. But she shouldn't, because it isn't. It's essentially a statement, and it's Stefan playing the part of the penitent redemption-seeker, but really, he hasn't done a thing to actually absolve himself or right the wrongs he's done to Elena, or Team Mystic Falls, or all the random victims who've fallen prey to him. THIS IS NOT REDEMPTION. These are hollow words. And I don't know how much more I can take of Elena taking them as solid acts of penance.

Damon shows up, and I breathe a sigh of relief. Thank god this nonsense is over. Let my beautiful boy fix things. I am hiding behind my love for Damon to preserve me from this episode. Leave me be.

GLORY BE, someone finally mentioned that Jeremy's still wearing the ring! Thank you, Bonnie. Seriously, Bonnie was a fountain of logic in this episode. But honestly, I'm fine with Jeremy still wearing it, so long as it's addressed. Ok, show. You're absolved for that one. (But you created so many new problems in this episode, YOU ARE NOT OFF THE HOOK.)

Ok, actually, maybe I was being a bit hasty when I said Damon would fix everything. Because, truth be told, I don't buy that Damon would suddenly be so adamant to take Alaric out. This is Damon we're talking about here. This boy will do absolutely everything to save the people he loves. And yes, that is a short list. But Alaric's on that list (right above ~buy more whiskey). So him suddenly seeming resigned to Alaric being lost rang as untrue to his character. But ultimately, this was the least of the slights this episode offered me, so I'm just gonna say, wrong, show, and move on.

Jeremy gets all enraged, and you know what, fair. Though he is being a bit of a teenage brat about it, but you know what? He is a teenage brat. So carry on, Jeremy Cleaver Gilbert. Enjoy your temper tantrum.

Ugh, Esther is the worst. She just is. Whatever. Elena goes with her.

AND HERE COME THE BOYS. Hotness abounds. The menfolk and their 'with purpose' walk are a lovely sight.

So who spent the whole evening pouring salt around the entirety of the school? That was a thick line of salt, man. That must have taken AGES. (Also, how was it completely untouched despite the fact that countless students must have been walking through it? Where did they find that much salt? Why does my mind insist on applying actual logic to vampire shows?)

IS THAT A GLOWING GLOBE? What is that even? Can I have one?

Bonnie and Jamie have a scene together, and I just don't care. Sorry, Bonnie. I'm glad you're getting screen time, but I just can't be bothered to care about a pairing of which one half exists solely to be a love interest. We know nothing about this guy, we have seen no buildup or chemistry between them, and I just don't care. Bring me back to the glowing globe, camera.

One brief complaint: "A normal guy wouldn't have said yes to a date with me." "Yeah, that's true." WHAT? NO! Was this supposed to be cute? Because it sounded to me like a comment from a girl with trauma and self-confidence issues that the guy either jokingly brushes off or genuinely validates. Ugh. No no no.

Damon shows up and is wonderful, because this is my coping mechanism. He turns on the awful fluorescent lights like a stern chaperone, and it's hilarious. Cockblocker!Damon FTW! "Sorry to spoil your seven minutes in heaven." I love you, sir. Also, I'm pretty sure I only enjoyed about a collective seven minutes of this episode. So, prescient, too.

Esther takes Elena to Alterlaric, and this scene is some parts whatever, some parts interesting. Yeah, yeah, doppelganger, whatever, don't care. But the two things I liked: Elena insists that Esther doesn't know anything about Alaric, and Esther counters that Elena doesn't really either. This is something I've been interested in for a while - Elena's blind faith in people based on gut instinct. It's something I liked a lot about the initial reveal that Alaric was the serial killer. Elena insisted that it couldn't have been Ric because she knows Ric, but honestly, she really doesn't. She loves him, and she needs him, and he's part of her family, but that doesn't necessarily mean that she knows him. So even though I don't necessarily agree with Esther, I always like any acknowledgement of the fact that Elena jumps into things based on feeling and instinct (except for Damon - HAD TO BE SAID), and that sometimes that lets her down.

I also quite liked the reveal that Esther had been talking to him and essentially brainwashing him every time he died. It provides a context for why Alterlaric is a crazy serial killer, and it's also just flat out creepy. Not to mention that it makes sense that Esther would target someone with so much latent hatred for vampires and coax out the drive already within him when his guard was down. Nicely played, show, all around.

Meanwhile, Esther's plan to make another Original is strange, but interesting. Elena has it right when she says it's a rubbish plan, so power to my girl for being the logical one in the situation, but I expect nothing from Esther at this point, so whatever.

Back to the dance, I really love this song too ("The Man I Love," fyi). But I do not love Klaus and his white suit. He is an exception to the episode rule of the well-dressed males. Whatever, Klaus. You want to be a white knight, fine (Klaus's white outfit to Tyler's dark - probably doesn't mean anything, but yay overanalyzing wardrobe choices!).

Great moment:

Caroline: Why do you always have to prove you're the alpha male?
Klaus: I don't have to prove anything, love, I am the alpha male!

LOL. Point.

Klaus and Caroline dance, and it just proves to me that Klaroline is a ship for lolz. But that being said, I really can imagine a proper Klaroline happening centuries from now, when Caroline is lonely and jaded and she comes upon a familiar face, and even though she hates him, it's a connection to Mystic Falls, to her youth and her friends and family and what once was. That could be something fantastic. But since I don't expect this show to span through the centuries of a vampire life, I'll just settle for the lolz.

JoMo moment of the week: there's this moment when Klaus has just given his romantic speech, and there's a pause when they just look at each other. But then Caroline scoffs, and Klaus gets this little look on his face, just the slightest bit crushed, because for one glorious instant there, he thought he was really getting to her. It's lovely.

And then he gets angry, and tells her that sooner or later Mystic Falls won't be enough for her, and he's right. This is the interesting part of Klaroline. The fact that despite everything, Klaus actually does have good insight into her, and that he tells her the things she doesn't want to hear about herself.

Ok, I'm not gonna lie. I loved everyone working together to get the fuck out of the school. Klaus and Team Mystic Falls unite! Yeah, he's still a dick, and he does his alpha male intimidation thing, what with his casual threat to murder everybody. But...look! He's just chilling with my Salvatores! My heart is happy. I never claimed to have my priorities straight.

Ok, seriously, WHAT is with Matt's walk? He comes in, sort of half-lumbering, half-loping, and it is a genuinely baffling gait. What are you even, Matt.

The Stefan Salvatore Logic in this episode was actually shockingly cogent! His entreatment to Klaus to not kill the people Bonnie actually cares about was excellent. I was impressed.

But now I can't stop imagining if Caroline and Tyler somehow weren't around and the only people trapped in the school were Damon, Stefan, and Klaus. Would Bonnie just leave them there forever? Can you IMAGINE? OMG, the lolz. Someone write me fic of Klaus and the Salvatores just living in the school and tormenting all the students out of sheer boredom.

Elena tries to reason with Alterlaric, but he's a typical fanatic, so it won't do. This scene was interesting enough, but the mention of Jenna threw me. On the one hand, fucking HUZZAH, someone remembers Jenna exists! Long overdue. But on the other hand, I fail to see how Jenna's death has anything to do with Alaric. It's not like he could have killed the Originals anyway. Really, he had little to do with that. Oh well.

When Esther forces the blood out of Elena, I was legit enraged. LEAVE MY GIRL ALONE. GTFO, Esther. Ugh.

I hate watching Elena struggle to fix it all when she can't change a thing. She begs Alaric not to do this, but it isn't Alaric, it's Alterlaric, So she stands on the sidelines again, helpless, just like she did when Jenna died, and it's tragic.

Bonnie and Damon snark while Klaus chills in the background, and it works. Bonnie is indignant and furious and not wrong, and Damon is unapologetic and awful and wonderful. Bonnie's right that there's always a choice, and I love that Damon knows that, and just doesn't care. It wasn't a choice for him.

LOL @ Klaus telling them to cut the dramatics. Look at your life, look at your choices.

"Get the humans ready." I love you, Klaus.

Stefan and Caroline take turns fretting in the gym while Tyler loiters behind them, and it just...it is. At least Caroline has figured out that by virtue of Main Character Immunity, Elena will be fine. Astute observation, lady.

Caroline and Tyler get their chance to argue, and I like all the complicated Tyler semi-self-sacrificial stuff up until he says "I should have never let him dance with you." Because, really? Sort of not an issue at all. Like. What. What does that even have to do with anything. Whatever. #I will fight this contrived love triangle to my grave

Proper Forwood shippers, answer me this: is this the first time Caroline's told Tyler she loves him? I suspect it is. So this was kind of cute.

And then is immediately followed by Elena ripping a stake out of her dead father figure. Have I mentioned lately that I love this show?

Nina Dobrev is the best crier. True statement is true.

So it seems as if Alaric is doomed, one way or the other. And the part of me that's been watching TVD for two years sort of thinks that makes him safe? I mean, obviously not really. But if we expect him to die...surely he can't die? Meh, he probably will. We'll see. But regardless, the idea of Esther giving him only a certain amount of power is interesting. How/when/why does it run out, can she add more, can she lose control of it? Questions, I have them.

All the awards to Elena for pointing out that Esther would be taking the good vampires out along with the bad. Genocide isn't cool, kids.

And ALL the awards for her refusing to let Esther emotionally manipulate her with mentions to Jenna. That's a cheap trick that a lot of shows pull with a much higher level of success, but Elena doesn't let it happen here, and I love her for it. She will not allow Esther to exploit Jenna as an argumentative tool, because Jenna deserves better than to be used like that.

Jenna is at peace, and I'm glad to hear it, but...how is she at peace? Didn't she die a fiery miserable death and leave her two wards alone and uncertain? Not sure I buy this...

The human boys show up wielding weapons, and, you guessed it: hot. But also, go humans, being useful!

Not gonna lie, a small, vengeful part of me sort of hoped Jeremy would have to shoot Matt to save Elena. Because oooh, the dark, the angst. But whatever, Alaric stabs Esther, and that works too.

Poor Alaric. How do you catch someone up on this?

Stefan is still super resistant to the pull of Klefan, and it makes me sad. Though it doesn't make me mature. "We're strange bedfellows, you and I." To which I respond: "I wish."

And Klaus keeps on keeping on, remind Stefan of the good old days. Nothing he says is wrong. I so wish Stefan could find some level of moderation. He may not like who he was back then, and he may be totally different now (he's not, but we'll let him think that for now), but that doesn't mean his feelings were any less real. He and Klaus were friends. That's that. (What's that you say? You hear the faint echoes of a Stefan/Rebekah tangent ringing through my words? I can't imagine what would give you that impression...)

But then Damon swoops in, to be territorial. My Brothership heart sings.

Klaus taunts them, and it's not like his point isn't valid, but here's the thing: I don't think Elena making a choice WILL break them. Or maybe that's just my Brothership heart talking. But I feel like there's this understanding between these boys that Elena is temporary. She doesn't want to be a vampire. So if she goes for Stefan, he has her for her lifetime (or not nearly as long, but this is just the hypothetical), and that's that. Not to mention, I genuinely think that Damon can deal if she chooses Stefan, because that's what Damon does. He deals. Besides, it's nothing he hasn't experienced before, and it's nothing he didn't expect. Stefan might be a bit more reluctant to accept Elena getting with Damon, but if there's a single consistent thing about Stefan's arc and characterization, it is that Stefan loves and needs his brother, and ultimately that will win out over any romantic troubles. I think they know that whatever happens with Elena, in the long run, it's just going to be them again. They are their only constants, so whatever happens in the near future, in terms of this eternity they've tangled themselves into, they're in it together.

Of course, all of this will get torn to shreds if Elena becomes a vampire (as many are speculating she will sooner rather than later), but I am more than ready to theorize about that. In the meantime, no, Klaus. I don't think this will break them. They're the Salvatores, man. That means something in my world. #my world = fandom

Bonnie continues the be the paragon of reason when she breaks the spell and we see that she's equally angry at BOTH Salvatores. Bless her. I think she's the only character on this show who seems to be holding Stefan equally accountable to Damon in terms of his misdeeds, and yes, it's regarding Abby's turning and not his history of awfulness, but I've grown so accustomed to people ignoring Stefan's responsibility for absolutely everything he's done that I will take what I can get. You go, Bonnie Bennett.

So here we have our Gilbert-Saltzman Clan goodbye scene. Again, Jeremy acts like a bit of a brat and almost storms out (because THAT wouldn't haunt him forever...), but he's allowed to, because he's a kid, and this is the worst. And bless the show for letting him be a kid sometimes. That is sort of what Jeremy represents to this show after all - a last chance at childhood, something they all fight for in his honor, since it's too late for them.

Meanwhile, Alaric chooses not to complete the transition, and for once, it's the right thing to do. And now I have to confess something: guys, I wanted Alaric to die. I didn't WANT him to die, but once it got to this point, now that it's too late to really save him (without some massive deus ex machina, which, you know, could totally happen, but it's a bit cheap), I just wanted this storyline to run its course. And I think that's why I didn't emotionally connect to the goodbye scenes the way I wish I could have, and the way I know I was supposed to - I knew he wouldn't die, so they didn't count. That's not strictly true - for all we know, our Alaric IS gone for good. But I'm not entirely sure that he is, so I couldn't give myself over to the end of it all, because it just wasn't the end. We had these lovely, emotional goodbye scenes, and the whole time, all I could think was, "But he's not really going to die, is he?" I know how these things work. That being said, this was still a good scene, even if it didn't kill me dead.

My absolute favorite part was the moment when Jeremy told him not to give some grand speech about how he needed to be the man of the house, and Alaric just quietly said, "Ok. I won't." and hugged him. This was gorgeous. There's nothing I love more than an understated goodbye. This was a silent, mutual acknowledging of everything these two men had done for each other, everything they felt, and all the things they never said but still knew. It was simple, and subtle, and really, really beautiful. A+ delivery from Matt Davis, and some great chemistry between the two of them. Then Jeremy runs off, because he's a kid. And it's ok.

Of course Elena blames herself, and it hurts. Alaric says some stuff about how taking care of the Gilbert kids has been the closest he's gotten to having the life he wanted for himself. It's tragic, and true, and just makes me ache a bit for these terribly sad people who have been fucked over by life through no fault of their own. What got me is that it was almost-happiness. Alaric found a sort of family with the Gilberts, but it still wasn't all he needed, and now he'll never get the chance. And Elena loses another parent figure, and gains a whole new burden of guilt and regret. These people and their pain. It's a heavy thing.

The two of them walk out to a vigil in Alaric's honor. It's touching and lovely, but all I can think is, who lit all these candles? Was that really the best use of their time? Whose idea was this? Did Caroline insist upon it? Did Damon roll his eyes at the dramatic of it all, or are the candles from his secret stash? So many questions.

Is this the time to mention that Damon casually leaning against whatever the fuck that was that he was leaning against was hot? Probably not. Alas.

Again, points to Matt Davis, for face reasons. His silent nod and solid effort not to go down under the weight of all this are lovely. And once more, a wordless acknowledgement of all the feelings and emotions and gratitude between these people. It's a thank you, it's an 'I love you,' and it's a goodbye.

It was pretty beautiful, not gonna lie. Plus that song was super emotionally manipulative. Do what you do, show.

Klaus undaggers Rebekah, and I rejoice. Then he gets his tearful yelling on, and that always works pretty well. Poor Klaus, destroying the world because of unresolved parent issues. To be fair, his parents are the worst.

Guys! Bonnie has a house! And LOL @ their mention of her father. Come on. He totally doesn't exist. You're not fooling me, show.

Oh, Bonnie. I liked this scene, even if I'm still getting dull brick vibes from Jamie. It's absolutely true to form that Bonnie knows she couldn't have done a thing (and this time she really couldn't have), and yet she still takes it hard. And I LOVED the moment when Jamie thanked her for protecting him and she said "Apparently it's what I do." Kat's delivery was excellent. Because Bonnie hates that she's this, that she is the deus ex machina, the girl who has to swoop in and fix everything. She didn't ask for this, she didn't court it, she actively tried to get away from it. But she's drawn back in again and again, and by virtue of the fact that she has the most power, she feels the greatest sense of responsibility for all the things that go wrong, for all the times they fail. It's killing her, just being who she is. And all she wants is to be ordinary. Poor, poor Bonnie.

I dug the bromance vibes between Jeremy and Matt at the bar. I also really got a sense of exhausted aftermath in these scenes of the kids dealing - I don't know what it was, but I felt the shellshock, the resignation, the weird sense of peace that comes after such a long night. It might not have ended the way you wanted it to, but it's over. This was an effective scene for me.

Bless Matt for still calling Alaric 'Mr. Saltzman.' Oh, Matt. And bless Jeremy for correcting him, because Alaric was part of the family, and that will be remembered, and that will be celebrated.

Aww, Jeremy and your single perfect manly tear. Cute.

Sigh. I just don't know what to do with this last Stefan/Elena scene. I get that they're trying to make Stefan the wonderful supportive semi-boyfriend to make him worthy of her love again, and I hate to say it, but I sort of feel like it's too little too late? I just can't let go of all the rancor I ranted about (at great length) earlier, just because he's finally not being the worst. This still isn't enough for me. Honestly, I don't know what is. But it BOTHERS me, seeing Elena lean on Stefan for emotional support, but only when he's ready for her to, only when it's convenient.

Also, Stefan makes it all about him, which, *facepalm.* Stop it, Stefan. Just stop it.

Ughhh, this: "I don't have anyone anymore." "You have me." Just. Does she, Stefan? I know Stefan will love her forever, I know that. I don't doubt the strength or truth of his love at all. But he is not stable. She didn't have him all season, and not always for good reasons. In fact, for half the season he actively refused to be there for her, just because he couldn't cope with it. So him being here for her now means very little to me. I don't trust it, and I don't think he deserves to be appreciated for it. Elena will take his support because she needs it and she's all confused about him and she will never turn him away, but it just rings of opportunism to me. That sounds harsh, and I don't mean that Stefan's taking advantage of the situation to get himself an in with her (though this certainly won't help his cause), but it just doesn't feel right to me. Stefan/Elena has not stood through every test. It just hasn't. So Stefan telling her she can rely on him makes me anxious, and I don't like it. He means well. But I think if he could go back in time to last season's finale and do it all over again, he would do the exact same thing. I don't fault him for that, because my Brothership heart rules and I love that Stefan's first priority is always, always Damon. But that being the case, it concerns me that he's set himself up to be Elena's rock when I'm not sure he can hold that position.

Also, they try to make this moment cute and romantic, and just. Do not want.

And to conclude the Stefan/Elena portion of this recap: what exactly have we learned from this episode? What has Elena figured out about her feelings for Stefan? This is something that frustrates me about this ep. For all that Elena was supposed to be sorting out her feelings, she never actually did any of that. It seems like they just sort of skipped the actual sorting part and went straight for the emotional dependency. Which, no. That is not what Elena's arc has been about all season. If she just falls into this again and we're supposed to take it as romantic? It is an understatement to say that I will be furious. Don't make it so, show. I'm counting on you. Don't let me down.

Meredith and Damon chat, and it actually works really well. I liked this quite a lot. I enjoyed Meredith quite a bit, and naturally Damon was spot on. This episode did an excellent job of having Damon be posturing and deflecting to deal with his hurt without making it over the top. This wasn't Damon acting out, but he's still doing his covering thing. His calm callousness and his public offers to snap necks were very Damon. And boy do I love Damon. Meanwhile, Meredith saw through it, which colored her interactions with him, which was perhaps why I found her so appealing in this scene. She was compassionate but subtle, and she read him well and acted accordingly.

With my OTP glasses firmly on, I'll say I quite liked his "Apparently my choices have been a little controversial lately." It had just the right edge of self-deprecation and anger and encroaching despair, and it was one of the only indications that this whole situation is getting to him, both Alaric and the Stefan/Elena mess. But it's quiet, and that's how Damon is when he's very, very upset by something. It worked for me.

One thing that was absolutely wonderful about this episode? That Damon/Alaric scene. I loved loved loved it for its quiet. All the best moments in this episode were the subtle ones. This wasn't a dramatic, emotional, deathbed declarations-y scene. It was just the two of them, sitting together, understanding. It was excellent on all levels.

First of all, ALL THE WINS for Ric's crack about Damon and the dreams. That was fantastic, because, a) it was hilarious, and b) lest we get too wrapped up in the romanticism of it all (after all, it was a key player in the makeout session in 3x19), the show makes fun of it a bit. Because Damon is not a romantic hero, thank you very much.

Damon's little "Damn you" was maybe one of the cutest things I've ever seen. These two were spot on together, and it was really a pleasure to watch.

The apology was perfect, because it was very Damon. Not too much, just enough.

The whole tone of this scene was flawless, because it was just the right mix of heartfelt and light. They sit together and they joke a bit, because neither of them are much into the whole dramatic goodbyes business. And that's why Alaric has that moment in the end, when he nearly loses it. He lets go, just a little, because he's here in the dark with his best friend who gets it, and everything about this is so horrible, but he has to do this, and he can do this, and Damon will help him.

So then we get witchy murmurings, and I become 100% convinced that I was right and that this is going to get undone. Not entirely undone, but enough to annoy me just a bit. Because if we're just going to have to say goodbye to Alaric again in a few episodes, well, I can't see how we'll care quite as much as we would have otherwise.

A brief moment of appreciation for Ian. He was phenomenal in the final scene when he realized Alaric was gone. Guys, the quiet, just. Gorgeous. And I have to say, congratulations on your face, Ian. But seriously, this was perfectly done. A flawless Damon reaction, the way he locks it down, the pain, breathes through it, copes. And every single one of the awards to the way he sort of half-salutes Alaric with the bottle before taking a last swig. It's his final farewell. Goodnight, friend, and travel well.

And then he hesitates to close the bottle, because when he does, it's over. So he takes a second, takes it in, and closes it. That's that.

Then poor possessed Bonnie shows up and ruins everything, and it was SO WEIRD to see Alaric with fangs. I don't even know why it struck me as so strange, but still. Crazy. And bless you, Matt Davis, for letting the blood drip out of your mouth in the grossest way. I bet he loves being as messy as possible with the fake blood, what with, you know, being insane. Have fun, man.

So once again, it's been a super long time since I started this recap. I am too emotionally exhausted to even decide how I feel. I got a lot angrier with everything as I was writing, but I've calmed down some (mostly because I left my house for about an hour and a half, which certainly helps calm the TVD rage). This episode was largely a trainwreck, if I'm honest. It had some flawless moments which were unfortunately surrounded by a whole mess of fail. So I'm going to need you to step it up, show. We have two episodes left. I need them to be fucking phenomenal. Because I'm pretty sure you owe me now. And despite everything, I've actually loved this season (I know, judge me, I don't care, IT WAS ALL ME), so wrap it up properly. Do better. It's not too late to fix (some of) this, but it needs to happen now. Stand by for judgment.

I really didn't think I could possibly match my word count from the last recap, but I suppose I underestimated what rage can generate (10, 767 words, apparently). Alas. You lovely flisters are total champs for putting up with me. Only two more of these. We'll get through.

ETA: I make it a point not to read other people's recaps before I write my own, lest I be influenced by other's thoughts (don't want to take credit for ideas that are not my own, nor do I want to give up an opportunity to be corrected :D). But I just checked my flist, and apparently EVERYONE is so angry about this episode. I find this to be a bit hilarious. Let's rage, fandom.