$5000 & No Sense
A check arrived in the mail late last week. The envelop sits unopened in my bedside drawer as I debate what to do with it. The check is from the University of Michigan School of Law. It's a refund check for his paid portion of 2007 first semester tuition. Legally, I have no right to withhold this check from my son. It's his mail.
U.M. wrote a check at the end of 2007 refunding James' tuition, but it sat unopened in a shoebox full of his mail for one year. Everything that arrived while he was in jail, or institutionalized, was placed in that box. In addition to his mail, there were countless phone messages from banks and collection agencies.
When James came home I gave him the box of mail. He refuses to open the mail. I explained to him that he has some serious financial issues to deal with. He says, "None of that matters, Yale, NYC, politics, blah blah blah." Much of that mail remains in the shoebox.
I know for certain the U.S. Department of Education is chasing him for loans he defaulted on. In one threatening letter they said he will be reported to the IRS and Justice Department. Speaking of the IRS, my son has not filed taxes for 2007 or 2008. He refuses to deal with that matter. "None of that matters, Yale, NYC, politics, blah blah blah."
The same bank that's chasing him for another student loan has called many times in regard to his defaulted credit card. Incredibly, this same bank allowed him to open two accounts only a few weeks ago with the same name, address, and SS number without a single red flag going up. WTF? He opened those accounts with a total of $27. I thought his odd banking plan would raise suspicion at the bank. I was wrong......but he has yet to write that one hundred million dollar check.
Back to the tuition refund. The dean of student affairs at U.M. Law called me the week I flew to Detroit. He explained the old refund check was being voided after going un-cashed for one year, and a new check would be issued. I begged him to send the $5000 to the U.S.D.O.E. because the funds are part of the defaulted loan. We both know what James will do should he get his hands on that money. He said he was powerless. The check must go to the student.
This $5000 will be enough for my son to book flights and get out-of-Dodge. He's terribly unhappy here, simply existing day-to-day, and desperately wants to be back east. He'll use this money to go Yale, NYC, or wherever his delusion leads him. On one hand I believe I should withhold the check. On the other I feel I should give him the mail because it's his mail, his right to have it, and what I'm currently doing is highly illegal.......regardless of my motive or intentions.
I'm leaning towards giving him the mail and having a discussion about what he should do with it. He should return it to the Department of Education. I know exactly what James will say when I try to discuss this check........"Yale, NYC, politics, blah blah blah." I don't know what to do because there are no good options.