Bad day...
So I'm sitting in my office right now, door shut and tears flowing down my face. I'm doing my best to not sob.
My mind keeps going back to the events of a year ago...
Feb 19 - we get the call, and Dad heads to the UW Medical Center for his lung transplant
Feb 20 - he looks healthier than ever, docs are amazed at this progress
Feb 21 - this was the last time I got to talk to him
Feb 22 - Dad was moved from ICU, docs saying he is doing so well he might get to go home in a few days. As he was so tired from everything, I didn't go down to see him. I wish I had because that evening Mom called and said I should head to the hospital as Dad had taken a turn for the worse and was moved back to ICU. He was sedated by the time I got there
Feb 23 2:51 AM - after trying for quite awhile to get his blood pressure up and doing CPR for what seemed to be forever, the docs call time of death
Losing him hurts so bad. We didn't have a lot of time together when I was growing up and I was looking forward to continuing to bond with him. There are so many things I wish I could have said to him.
***********
So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
Did they get you to trade
Your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
And cold comfort for change?
Did you exchange
A walk on part in the war,
For a lead role in a cage?
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl,
Year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found
The same old fears.
Wish you were here.
My mind keeps going back to the events of a year ago...
Feb 19 - we get the call, and Dad heads to the UW Medical Center for his lung transplant
Feb 20 - he looks healthier than ever, docs are amazed at this progress
Feb 21 - this was the last time I got to talk to him
Feb 22 - Dad was moved from ICU, docs saying he is doing so well he might get to go home in a few days. As he was so tired from everything, I didn't go down to see him. I wish I had because that evening Mom called and said I should head to the hospital as Dad had taken a turn for the worse and was moved back to ICU. He was sedated by the time I got there
Feb 23 2:51 AM - after trying for quite awhile to get his blood pressure up and doing CPR for what seemed to be forever, the docs call time of death
Losing him hurts so bad. We didn't have a lot of time together when I was growing up and I was looking forward to continuing to bond with him. There are so many things I wish I could have said to him.
***********
So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
Did they get you to trade
Your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
And cold comfort for change?
Did you exchange
A walk on part in the war,
For a lead role in a cage?
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl,
Year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found
The same old fears.
Wish you were here.