I don't know where to begin.
What horrible timing. Sara turns 21, things are going well with Cory and I trying the friend thing out, school is almost here so that means friendies return - everyone is finally getting happy. And then I find out Camilo is diagnosed with cancer.
I dunno if I ever used his name in any of my entries before - but he was my winter/work boy who moved back home in July. He's been sick since July and has updated me on everything and then out of nowhere - he tells me Saturday night that he has cancer and is in Richmond receiving intensive chemotherapy and other extensive treatments for at least the next month.
Saturday we went out at midnight for Sara's birthday and then again Sunday in Baltimore so it's been simply a thought in the back of my mind. We got back this afternoon and it's been the first time I've actually had time to sit down and think about it and have it dawn on me - that Camilo is dying. He's not doing well but he has hope [as it should be]. But I'm so.... so scared. He's not acting himself at all. Although if I received a time frame of the remainder of my life I might act different too. But fuck dude he's DYING.
I was so caught up in Salisbury and not thinking about the next time I'm gonna see him and now I'm freaking out about the fact that I might not see him again alive. So I planned a day trip to go see him in the hospital on Friday. He wants me to come - which feels good. He said my voice would be "a light in the dark." But I'm scared to see him. I'm gonna be a wreck and the whole reason of going is to give him hope and surround him with love and support and let him know he can beat this. And crying hysterically in front of him is not the right way to do so.
Why.
I dunno if I ever used his name in any of my entries before - but he was my winter/work boy who moved back home in July. He's been sick since July and has updated me on everything and then out of nowhere - he tells me Saturday night that he has cancer and is in Richmond receiving intensive chemotherapy and other extensive treatments for at least the next month.
Saturday we went out at midnight for Sara's birthday and then again Sunday in Baltimore so it's been simply a thought in the back of my mind. We got back this afternoon and it's been the first time I've actually had time to sit down and think about it and have it dawn on me - that Camilo is dying. He's not doing well but he has hope [as it should be]. But I'm so.... so scared. He's not acting himself at all. Although if I received a time frame of the remainder of my life I might act different too. But fuck dude he's DYING.
I was so caught up in Salisbury and not thinking about the next time I'm gonna see him and now I'm freaking out about the fact that I might not see him again alive. So I planned a day trip to go see him in the hospital on Friday. He wants me to come - which feels good. He said my voice would be "a light in the dark." But I'm scared to see him. I'm gonna be a wreck and the whole reason of going is to give him hope and surround him with love and support and let him know he can beat this. And crying hysterically in front of him is not the right way to do so.
Why.