These are the only ones I apply:
In the year 2006 I resolve to:
Start using a condom.
Get your resolution here In the year 2006 I resolve to:
Dedicate my life to making someone else's horribly miserable.
Get your resolution here Not that I've ever done it...
In the year 2006 I resolve to:
Sell myself on E-bay.
Get your resolution here Bids anyone?