Dear Philip seymore hoffman (copied from myspace)
please stop taking roles in movies that involve the work of Tom Cruise. First off, he's one cashew short of being a nut job. Secondly, he gives 1/3 of his paycheck to scientology (could it be? a religion more greedy than Catholicism! free at last!). However, i'm going to have to say the most important factor for my decision would be his awful acting. Have you noticed every character is a cocky little bastard? C'mon Phil, that's not acting. Even when he was younger and played the semi-hot irish guy, (you know, the one that moved to America and got punched in the face all day) his character was no more than Tom Cruise with a dollar store quality irish accent. Oh, dearest Philip, i usually gag at the sight of a freckled redheaded man, but you, my dear, you make me smile with the anticipation of greatness. Before i go, i must note, i think you should do a sex scene. It would be REAL, man. It would be like, "this is humping after 57 years of marriage". i dig that, Phil.
BFF ( best friends forever),
Chelsea
p.s. Are your lips real? Don't go all hollywood on me, phil. It just isn't your color.
thats the conversation i had with Phil when i saw he was in mission impossible. he got all defensive, which is probably a red-flag that i hit just about every "bad truth" nerve in his body. He'll thank me later. his sex scene is going to be better than when kathy baits showed her supple breasts.
besides that little sociopath-like inner dialog, i made an amazing marmalade cake. Its way better than that easy bake betty crocker crap. you know the one. they just fill nasty box cake with dyed frosting or jello, light it on fire and call it baked alaska. i am NOT falling for it. okay, i kinda fell for it, but than i was like, "what would i put in there?"because at first it seemed amazing. i soon realized its limitations. could you make cornbread cake, fill it chili and frost it with mashed potatoes? only if you want to piss of your cake loving 2 year old, or totally run your 7 year olds birthday party.
no thank-you.
bye,
chelsea
so i have to admit to my more close-knit LJ community that i write such bizarre entries with the thoughts that people i hardly know are going to read them and be horrified. for some reason its wildly entertaining. and childish. but more of the first one. i also find it an interesting tactic to kinf od write like a 6th grade book report. im hoping to hear roomers that im a pervert and mildly handicapped.
BFF ( best friends forever),
Chelsea
p.s. Are your lips real? Don't go all hollywood on me, phil. It just isn't your color.
thats the conversation i had with Phil when i saw he was in mission impossible. he got all defensive, which is probably a red-flag that i hit just about every "bad truth" nerve in his body. He'll thank me later. his sex scene is going to be better than when kathy baits showed her supple breasts.
besides that little sociopath-like inner dialog, i made an amazing marmalade cake. Its way better than that easy bake betty crocker crap. you know the one. they just fill nasty box cake with dyed frosting or jello, light it on fire and call it baked alaska. i am NOT falling for it. okay, i kinda fell for it, but than i was like, "what would i put in there?"because at first it seemed amazing. i soon realized its limitations. could you make cornbread cake, fill it chili and frost it with mashed potatoes? only if you want to piss of your cake loving 2 year old, or totally run your 7 year olds birthday party.
no thank-you.
bye,
chelsea
so i have to admit to my more close-knit LJ community that i write such bizarre entries with the thoughts that people i hardly know are going to read them and be horrified. for some reason its wildly entertaining. and childish. but more of the first one. i also find it an interesting tactic to kinf od write like a 6th grade book report. im hoping to hear roomers that im a pervert and mildly handicapped.