Jul 18, 2008 22:08
So, this is my first OneShot!
I wrote it when I was kind of depressed ~
So it's a bit sad!
But I really like the story.
I hope you like it too.
It has a bit of a Songfic.
I used a song for the last lines, too.
But it's not a song from Ryo like I should have done xD
Enjoy ~
Title: I will love you forever
Author: cherrylady6
Rating: PG
Pairing: RyoTego
Summary: Tegoshi feels lonely and wants to end his love forever.
A/N: It was hard to find a reason for the fight between RyoTego! xD
Thanks Biggy, for sharing your ideas with me ^^
But the idea i took came when I was in my holidays in Spain ^^
I will love you forever
He walked through the streets of Sapporo. Alone. The houses looked grey and high. They looked all the same. It was cold. And it was already night. He didn’t know how long he walked on. He only thought of escaping. Escaping from his life. It seemed to him as if he left his home just before some minutes. But it were already hours. He heard the words to often. The three words that are supposed to be the most beautiful words ever in the world. He couldn’t hear them anymore. The words didn’t mean a thing to him. He had always forgiven him. His little faults. Because he loved him. He tried to trust him every time. But this time was enough. He ended it. There was no way back.
Didn’t you say you wanted to hold me close?
Hold me close
He stopped on a bridge and looked down. Water flowed down. It looked so beautiful. There was no one who could see the tears of him falling down. Mixing with the water. No one to cheer him up. To tell him to stop crying. He was alone.
He felt the ring on his finger. The ring he was given by his precious one. He couldn’t see clearly but he became even more sad by looking at the ring. It was made with love. Definitely. He took off the ring and looked inside.
I will love you forever.
Forever? Who know when it will end. Forever can be really short. It could end tomorrow. Or today. He turned the ring in his hands. Then he let go of the ring and watched how it fell into the river. Listened to the low sound when it plunged in the water.
Goodbye. There’s no place for you in my life anymore. Goodbye.
He turned around and left the place. He left his love there. And his life. He left that all behind.
The night got even colder and darker. No one knew he was in this city. Alone and all by himself. No one was there to find him. Did even someone think of him?
While he walked on with his thoughts it began to rain slightly. He was cold but he didn’t want to go home. Home? Where was his home? He was nowhere home.
Maybe there was a person waiting for him. Wanting to see him. But that wasn’t his home.
He looked down all the way. He just walked where his feet would lead him to. He didn’t hear anything. He was in his own world where nobody else was in.
A small raindrop slides down the
white windows
Now I’m used to be alone
and though I left you, I didn’t let you fall
Suddenly he got out off kilter and fell down. His left shoulder hurted.
“Watch out where you’re going”, said an older man who didn’t look friendly.
He stood up and faced the man.
“You better watch out”, he said with clear and confirmed voice.
He saw the fist of the man coming but was unable to move. The man hit him hard and he bent down because of the pain. The man looked at him again before he turned around and walked on. It still rained. He lay on the wet ground. It was cold but he felt numb. He didn’t even feel the pain of the punch. He knew from the beginning that he was too weak to handle the male. But he couldn’t give up from the start. He had to fight. And someday he would win. Against all.Slowly he stood up and noticed blood coming out of his mouth. He wiped it away and looked up in the sky.
*****
I’ll catch the stars for you.
Look, this one. It’s beautiful, isn’t it?
It shines more than the others.
We call it after you okay?
That’s Tego-nyan.
Someday, I’ll bring it to you, okay?
Watch out for the day!
*****
He could feel tears in his eyes. Looking at the sky. There were so many stars. But he could tell exactly which star it was that his precious one called after him. The one who shone the most. The tears running down his face hurted in the wound on his mouth.
He noticed that he was completely drenched from the rain. But he didn’t bother at all. He walked through the streets with few light and found himself at the park. He searched for their place. It was hidden behind a piece of wood. He climbed over a fallen trunk and finally he could see the lake he searched for.
When he walked out of the forest he stood there for a moment just looking at the beautiful scene. The moon reflected in the water and the stars too. Slowly he walked towards the bench in front of the lake and sat down, still looking at the water. He could feel that the bench was wet too, but he was there and this was the only thing that counted.
He put out his phone and looked at it. The display blinked and shows him that he had five new voice mails. He knew who sent them before hearing them. He opened his phone and looked at the display. It showed a picture of him and his precious one. Raindrops fell on the picture ... and tears of him, too. They mixed with the rain.
He pressed the button to open the messages and lifted slowly his hand with the phone to his ear.
Where are you!? I’m waiting here for you an ..
The phone fell on the ground. When he heard his voice he was surprised. Although he already knew that it was him. He couldn’t bear to hear this voice now. He looked at the phone laying on the ground. Because of the silence around him he could still hear the message. He picked it up again slowly and stopped the message.
He stood up and walked towards the lake. He wasn’t far from the edge but still walked on.
Even if we’ve grown used to loneliness
only relying on the light of the moon
We have to fly away with featherless wing
just go foward, just a little further
When he was on the shore he stopped and looked down. The water under him was quite deep and he knew that if he fell down now he would definitely drown. He opened the phone in his hand and looked at the picture. There he was. He missed him so much. But he wasn’t here. He was alone. The soil under his feet was wet and he slid a bit although he just stood there. He could see raindrops falling on the surface of the water. The reflection of the star was right under him. He closed his phone and thought of him. His precious one. And then he stepped forward ...
On the opposite coast of sadness
is something called a smile
It was a really beautiful time with you!
But now, it’s time to try something new.
I miss the special something in our relation.
And I must admit,
I don’t love you like I loved you
when I fell in love with you.
There’s another one I fell in love with.
Please accept this.
I will pack your things this evening and
I hope you will move out as fast as you can.
I don’t want to hurt you
but I can’t live any further with you.
Let’s talk tthings over this evening.
I’ll wait for you.
He felt a hand on his wrist, holding him back. He was pulled away from the edge towards the bench he was sitting on just a few minutes ago. He slipped and fell on the ground. His pants were covered with mud as well as his hands. The rain continued. And he didn’t dare to look up to the one who saved him.
“What the hell were you doing?”, asked a young female voice.
He looked up to her and was quite surprised. From her voice he had expected a grown-up lady instead of a young lady. Although it was really dark he could figure out her look. Her black hair glowed in the moonlight and he could see the sorrowful eyes looking at him. But he couldn’t answer. He couldn’t say a word.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt?”He didn’t answer.
“That won’t solve your problems. What were you thinking? It’s gutless to end your life. You should face your problems. Don’t run away, okay?”
He stood slowly up and looked in her eyes. He nodded.
“Don’t do that ever again. Can I .. can I leave you alone now? You won’t do anything stupid again, will you?”
He looked down. But then he faced her again and said in a low voice “No, I won’t”.
After all, we can’t return to the past
It’s all the game
He saw her smiling a bit before she turned away and the she disappeared in the forest.
He fell on his knees and thanked god. He never knew he had a guardian angel. But - why wasn’t his precious one supposed to be his guradian angel?
He still sat on his knees when he looked again at his phone. He opened his mailbox and hesitated a moment before he opened his messages. He skipped all of them until he reached the last. He left it just some minutes ago. And he wanted to hear it. Wanted to hear his voice so badly. He needed him. He wanted to hear all he had to say until the end. He opened the message and listened. But there was nothing to listen. There was just silence. But he couldn’t stop the message. He knew there was something he got to say. He waited. Waited for seconds. And for minutes. And finally .. he heard his voice. Saying wonderful lines.
If I see you again, I’ll probably cry
I’ll be the first to cry cuz I’m weak without you
Take my hand Honey so we always be strong
Then when we can have fun together
let’s run away and leave everything behind
Let’s stay together forever, you and me baby
we can stop the clouds from flowing back in
Let’s stay together forever, cuz while I’m here
You can always just be, who you want to be
Come home, Tego-nyan.
What happened?
I’ll wait for you.
I’ll be here whenever you need me.
I’ll be with you. Forever.
The message ended. And he felt that his heart was heavy. How could he say these lines? He could feel the tears in his eyes. Damn, why was it all so complicated!?
He stood up, turned around and looked at the sky. He saw the star. Was he wrong or shone it lower than normal? Goodbye, memories.
But then he remembered his voice. And the message.
The days I spent with you
will sparkle longer than eternity
He fell down. He didn’t mind the mud. He didn’t mind the rain. All he felt were his hot tears streaming down his cold face. One after another. He cried so much like he never cried. He screamed. He hit the ground. There weren’t any tears left when he lifted his head up and looked at the sky. At the stars shining above him. The stars who lead him to his home. Home. He had a home. A place where he belonged to.
He stood quick up and balanced himself because he felt a bit dizzy.
His phone was still in the mud. He didn’t notice it.
He decided to head home. He walked through the forest and crossed the park. It was a long way home. But he didn’t mind. At least it was his home. And there was someone waiting for him.He was stupid. Maybe it was all a big misunderstanding? Maybe he overacted? Maybe he hurt the person he loved the most because he ran away? Because he hadn’t faced his problems? His fears?
In order to chase our dreams,
we can’t have a reason to run away
Finally, he arrived at his house. He looked up to the window where he expected him to wait for him. He was right. There was light. It was nearly morning and he still waited for him. Although he had plenty of work today. He knew that.
He opened the door and looked surprised at the ground. There was a way of rose petals placed on the floor. The way continued upstairs. Slowly he closed the door and followed the roses. He reached the first floor and opened the door. He looked into the room and saw him sitting at the table in the middle of the room. The table was covered with red candles, plates and rose petals. He knew that he was sleeping but when he entered the room quietly he woke up immediately and stood up so fast that the chair fell down.
“You’re home! Where were you? I was so worried about you! I left you messages on your mailbox! What happened, Tego-nyan? Did I do something wrong?”
He stood right in front of him and looked him in the eyes. He was really worried and went nearly crazy when his boyfriend didn’t come home.
“Today .. I .. saw your letter ..”, he stopped.
“Which letter?”
“You hid it in your nightstand, right? When do you wanted to give it to me?”
“Huh? Which letter?”
He pulled a white mailer outside his pocket and gave it to him.
“This one.”
He opened it slowly and when he read the first lines he began slowly to smile.
“Is this the reason why you ran away?”
Tegoshi nodded.
“Oh dear! Hey, you really thought I would end our relation like this? What do you think of me?”
“… but .. i thought ..”
“My grandma cleaned our attic and found a pack of old letters. She send them to me. I read them all because I searched a special one. This letter was given to me by my girlfriend at that time. We lived together for some time but she was so gutless and wrote me only a letter. When I came to our house I found my packed things but she wasn’t at home. I haven’t seen her since then but I kept this letter.”
He hugged him tightly as if he would never let go of him.
“I love you, got it? There’s no way I want to end our relation! I love you more than everything in the world! More than everything you can buy with money, okay?”
He loosened the hug.
“By the way, what were you doing at my nightstand?”
“ .. Anou .. I wanted to look for a hint for my birthday present ..”
“It’s a surprise! Matte, okay? I really want to surprise you, Tego-nyan!”
He nodded and smiled.
“Where’s your ring?”
With inquiring eyes he looked at his empty finger.
“Erm .. Ryo .. I’ve lost it. I …”
“Oh dear, you’re so clumsy!” He laughed. “But that’s also why I love you. I’ll buy you a new one tomorrow, okay? But .. I never want to lose you.”
Tegoshi smiled. Without saying a word he pointed at a stuffed yellow star that leaned against the wall.
“Oh, yes. Remember, Tego-nyan? I said once that I will bring you a star from the sky. The most beautiful star which I called Tego-nyan. This is it. Our star. It’s for you.”
He gave the stuffed star to Tegoshi. It was small but pretty.
“Oh, I cooked for you! I planned a romantic evening today. Let’s see if it’s still wa ..
Tegoshi interrupted him with a kiss. He could feel the dry lips from Ryo on his own and he enjoyed this feeling the most in the world. He would never let Ryo go. How could he? He was so romantic. And he cared about him. There was no way Tegoshi could love without him.
“You’re my everything, Ryo-tan. I will love you forever”, he whispered into his ear while he hugged him closely.
Ryo couldn’t hide his smile but parted the embrace. He looked happy at Tegoshi before he approached slowly and kissed him again. Softly. With all his love.
“I love you too, Tego-nyan. Forever and ever.”
Remember me, when you’re lonely
Always softly wishing
When I sang
if you’d turned around, you could be by my side
I’m glad to have loved you
I’m glad to have been with you
Dear Tego-nyan!
I wish you a happy birthday!
You are the best what ever happened to me!
I enjoy the time with you. Every single minute.
There’s not a single second where I don’t want to be with you.
You’re my precious one. My everything,
Don’t ever leave me, okay?
I will love you forever!
Because you are the one with who I want to be together forever.
Hanashitakunai towa ni.
Motto dakishimetai yo
Boku no mune de.
Mamoritai nani mo kamo nakushite demo
Itsumade mo kimi dake wo aishiteru.
**********
I really hope you enjoyed this.
I loved to write this although
it was a bit complicated.
Comments are ♥
Ja ne ~
nishikido ryo,
fanfic,
one shot,
ryotego,
tegoshi yuya