Persona 4 Souji/Yosuke; Just A Page In Love
A/N: First of all, Happy St. Patty's Day to all!
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Wow, it took me forever to finally post this! I kept getting little visitors to take care of at home, so I was kinda distracted from writing. Right now I'm taking care of kiddies too, but I think I can manage. *hours later* Maybe not. >.>; This is the first official P4 fic I post on my writing journal, since most of my fics were posted at badbadbathhouse as Anon. xD So, regardless I do hope that someone enjoys this one too.
If you want to fully experience this fic, listen to this song while reading it *loser*; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXVUvAtZJ-M
Title: Just a Page in love
Pairing: Souji/Yosuke and everyone else in the investigation team? >.>;
Rating: M
Summary: Yosuke doesn't want to get caught up in Souji's harem, but somehow the harem comes to him in a most deliciously taboo dream. But, in the end all the Magician really wants is his Fool. ( no obvious spoilers, promise. )
Authors Note: Inspired by Darren Hayes' Love and Attraction song, because it suited the mood of the fic. I didn't italicize the dream sequence because most of the fic is a dream, sorry if it confused anyone! D: Also, there is a little mini surprise for Kingdom Hearts fans, well, very little, but if anyone catches on to it bonus points to you. Why they were there is beyond me... >.>; Last, but not least there are bound to be many more Tarot references in my writing in the near future. I do hope someone enjoys said references. :)
Dedications: To anyone that reads and enjoys it. :) But, I must give extra thanks to my muse Darren Hayes, since now I cannot possibly think of writing Yosuke without involving Darren in some way. My fanfic!Yosuke admires him very much. :3
Disclaimer: Lucy is a Fag Hag through and through, but thy characters portrayed in thee smut, thou shalt not hers. Sadly, but unfortunately true.
The day before when Nanako announced that she had gone grocery shopping, Souji knew what he had to do. As in every other time the fridge had been full, it was time to make another one of his orgasmic lunches that he was known for. The best part being that he would be able to share it with any of his friends, which obviously meant some alone time with said friend. He usually liked to alternate between them, but he was making one of Yosuke’s favorite dishes, so it was honestly inevitable.
After finishing up Souji went to bed, and for some reason had anticipated tomorrow’s lunchtime like never before.
~~~~
Morning classes were over, and Souji with bento in hand walked over to Yosuke. He smiled, “Would you like to eat lunch with me?”
Yosuke didn’t even have to give it a second thought, because he knew how awesome Souji’s lunches were. Rejecting his offer was blasphemous on it’s own. The reddish brunet nodded as he grinned back, “Sure, partner! Man, I’m starving so I hope you brought enough for the both of us.”
“When haven’t I?” Souji smirked and both of them made their way to the rooftop.
That’s when it happened.
For some reason the silver haired Persona user was a little too anxious for his own good. Seriously, it felt odd. He was not the anxious type… His calm and collected nature was what he was mostly known for. He shrugged the feeling off as he opened up the bento box, and Yosuke’s eyes lit up.
“Oh yes! You made my favorite!”
Souji nodded and extended a piece of the chicken into his direction, “Here, have a bite.”
The brunet leaned in and bit into the poultry, closing his eyes savoring the texture of the recipe all together. It was incredible how the man was good at so many things, especially stuff involving his hands. Yosuke pictured his friend marinating and covering the cut slices of chicken with starch. To think Souji had put so much time into something for him…
“Like it?”
“Mmm, yes, it’s so good,” Yosuke slid his tongue over his lips, and hoped there was more where that came from.
Gray eyes practically gawked at the pink that poked out of the other’s mouth, and Souji was slightly becoming jealous of his own cooking. The look on Yosuke’s face was uncalled for, with rosy pink dusted cheeks and all. It was a look of pure bliss.
Rather, it was a mighty dangerous expression to wear in front of Souji.
Without processing any further thought the distance between them seized to be, as Souji aimed for that ever so pretty tantalizing mouth. Although, sadly, he missed and kissed the side of Yosuke’s nose instead. Before he had a chance to attempt once more, the homophobe he had for a best friend stood up instantly.
“What the-?! Souji, what the hell was that?!”
The silver-haired teen was not a man of many words, but it seemed to be more the case at that particular moment. He really didn’t have a single thing to say, and much less to him. Souji couldn’t very well tell Yosuke it was his own damn fault for teasing him the way he had. So, he decided the best course of action was to feign ignorance.
“Sorry, you had something on your nose,” Souji replied knowing it was a very lame excuse, and there was no way in the world-- not even the T.V world he was going to buy it.
Yosuke blushed a deeper red and passed his hand over his nose, “Oh, really? Well, you could’ve just told me… I mean, that was a little, um, weird. You do know that you almost kissed me? If I hadn’t---” The brunet paused at the unfazed look on his best friend’s face.
“Anyways, you can have the rest, I have to get going,” he gave the bento to Yosuke, and got up to leave.
“Wait, Souji! Where do you have to go, maybe I can come with?”
Souji merely shook his head, “Yumi wanted me to stop by drama to practice our lines if I had time during lunch. If you want to put up with drama club stuff then you’re welcome--”
Oddly, the way his friend phrased it all bothered him. He felt there was some spite thrown in the mix, and it wasn’t sitting too well for Yosuke. Why would Souji get up and leave in the middle of their lunch? Or even better question to ask himself, why did he invite him to eat lunch in the first place if he had a prior engagement? Especially with a girl… Yosuke knew he was very popular with the ladies, but Souji was never to put any chick before him. Wait, why was he putting so much thought into it all? Man, he was only going to rehearse his lines with his drama partner. He froze as the word partner lingered freshly in his mind.
Those concerned eyes stared at the brunet quizzically, “I take it you don’t want to go?”
Yosuke sighed as he took another bite off the fried chicken, “Nah, I’ll be okay. Now, don’t get frisky while rehearsing though, even if I’m sure she wouldn’t mind…”
The other teen chuckled and shook his head, “Come on, you know it’s not like that.”
“Yeah, sure, she’s practically throwing herself at you. I’m sure it is just like that.”
Souji cocked a brow, “Aw, are you interested?”
“Whoa, wait! I’m not-- I mean, interested? You know I’m not into that--” Yosuke was terribly embarrassed, and a bright crimson red to boot.
“I thought Yumi was your type though, or do you still have eyes for a certain idol?”
“Oh, Yumi, right you meant Yumi… and huh? No, way, I--” The reddish brunet couldn’t believe just how much he was stuttering, and the fact that he had considered something totally, completely-- inappropriate! Wrong, wrong, wrong. He was having a Kanji moment, and he had to rid of it immediately. The poor bento box was being tossed around like a Mr. Potato head doll. It felt even worse, considering how delicious it’s contents were, but Yosuke had to leave Souji’s sight as fast as possible. Too many unnecessary questions were making their way into his head, and he had no way of figuring out how to answer them.
“You okay? You seem really out of it,” Souji frowned knowing that Yosuke was about to have steam come out of his ears at any moment, if their line of conversation were to continue.
“Sorry, buddy, thanks for the food, but... I should get going. Don’t want to be late, or anything you know? Heh, heh,” Yosuke knew he was pushing it, and Souji was going to see right through him. Instead though, he let him go, and Yosuke hauled himself away from his presence.
Souji was indeed disappointed, in himself mostly; if only he hadn’t made that bold move they would still be having lunch. But he couldn’t hide the hurt he felt when Yosuke reacted the way he did. Then again, he should’ve known he wouldn’t have reacted in any other way. Now the food he had spent all night preparing for his best friend, was left mostly untouched and underappreciated. He picked the lunch up and made his way to the drama club, in hopes of forgetting the recent events.
It hurt even more when he realized how he used the attention girls gave him, to forget about how he felt for one Yosuke Hanamura. He suddenly felt nauseated, and made his way to the restroom. There was no way Yumi could see him like that now.
~~~~~
Yosuke couldn’t believe how fast the day went by after lunch, but he was grateful for it. He rubbed his temple still frustrated at the conversation he had earlier with Souji, but there wasn’t much he could do. Although, not being able to stop thinking about him was proving to be quite difficult for the brunet.
After making his way into his bedroom, he checked his cellphone, but no new calls. It wasn’t as if he were waiting for a particular call or anything…Or was he? Souji usually called him the afternoons they didn’t go walking home together. If Yosuke wasn’t called for Junes duty, Souji would have some sort of extra curricular going on. No matter what, he knew their time together was special. He was one of the easiest guys to talk to, and it made absolute sense that he had been assigned the position as leader.
From time to time Yosuke had to admit he would get jealous, since the guy was practically perfect. But, as he got to know his best friend more and more, he oddly started growing very fond of the dude. Besides, he had seen the worst of Yosuke and he was still there for him. If that wasn’t a true friend, he didn’t know what was.
There was a ton of homework, but he really didn’t feel like getting anything done. He was sure to regret it in the morning, but essays and mathematical equations were not on his agenda tonight. It was probably best to go to bed early, maybe in the morning he could ask Chie for answers or something. Even if he was more than certain her answers would be totally wrong, but he still had a glint of hope she got some off of Yukiko. In all honesty, he would ask Souji, but he still felt awkward about earlier. So naturally, he was out of the question.
“I might as well go shower,” Yosuke sighed and took a clean towel, closing the bedroom door behind him. Once the showerhead began to drench an overly exhausted Yosuke, a familiar ringtone felt a little lonely as it echoed in his room.
~~~~
A shower was exactly what the brunet needed, in order to temporarily forget about all the prior thoughts invading his consciousness. He dried his damp hair with his maroon colored towel, and walked over to his bed. All homework forgotten, he pulled on light orange pajama bottoms and plopped himself onto the mattress.
The lights were off, and the room was silent save for Yosuke’s tired breathing. He was trying to sleep, but it wasn’t working out as he had planned. Tossing and turning for almost two hours on end, until Yosuke took out his mp3 player and listened to some music. Thankfully, it had calmed him down some.
Listening to the current song, he couldn’t help but let his fickle mind wander off to the person he couldn’t stop thinking about. Yosuke never understood why he loved the artist he was listening to so much, considering that most of his songs revolved around love, romance, and relationships. But it’s as if this Darren Hayes character knew what he was going through most of the time. Nevermind that the man was gay, and he was mostly singing about those kind of relationships… It was just, comforting.
The song drawled on, and Yosuke let himself rest his eyes letting the sandman carry him away from reality. The real world seemed to be a real drag anyway.
~~~~~
Everything seemed different somehow, there was fog everywhere, but he knew he wasn’t in the T.V world. It was a wide open space, with hardly any lights on, and the lights that were on were used for raving. The smell of cigarettes and booze filled the air, and it was almost intoxicating. Although, Yosuke never liked either one, it was still an interesting sight to behold.
He noticed the room began to fill itself up with people dancing to no music, until a random DJ appeared and started performing. Coincidentally it was the song he was hearing before… wait, was he? No, he didn’t recognize his surroundings one bit. Where was he?
The song, every single beat made him shudder in anticipation. It was such a weird feeling, but he wanted to just bust out some moves in the middle of the dance floor. Sadly, it wouldn’t be any fun if he didn’t have anyone to mingle with.
Half naked women appeared out of nowhere, and were moving against each other in ways Yosuke wasn’t even aware could be done. But that’s not what caught his attention, no, it was a very familiar person dirty dancing with a bunch of other random women. Although, upon further inspection they weren’t random women at all.
“What the… Chie, Yukiko…? Rise? What’s going on?”
The girls were all rubbing up on Souji, touching every part of him in sight, and it made Yosuke very uncomfortable. Next thing he knew a finger was beckoning him to come to them as well, that finger was none other than of Rise Kujikawa.
“Come on Yosuke-senpai, have some fun with us!” Rise giggled as she slowly sucked on a sensitive spot on Souji’s neck causing him to grab her waist to bring her closer.
Yukiko and Chie were not as into it as Rise, but they did contribute on the leader groping. They were on either side of him, and each began to nibble on an earlobe. The music continued to boom in the background, as the words became clearer with every line sung.
Everyone that I desire, wants to be with someone else…
“What are you all doing? This is not like you Chie! And Yukiko? Rise… what the… What’s going on…?”
The four of them continued to go with the beat, and Souji smirked in Yosuke’s direction, “Don’t you like this sorta thing? Loosen up, let’s have some fun.”
“B-but, Souji, this is…” Yosuke couldn’t believe he was trying to turn down such a sweet and tempting offer. It was just so awkward, and it felt so wrong. But the thrill of it all proved to be quite enticing, and Yosuke had to admit they all looked so fucking good together. Especially him, he wanted to feel just how excited Souji looked.
Yosuke looked around and there seemed to be a lot of people at this club like atmosphere, he apparently even spotted Naoto, Kanji and Teddie somewhere in the background. Teddie seemed to want to drag them away to the dance floor, but they weren’t having any of it. Or at least not with Teddie, so he gave up on them and began to make his way up to the group. Oh no, this couldn’t end well at all.
“Oooh, Sensei seems to be having lots of fun. Teddie wants to join in too!”
Souji separated himself from the girls temporarily reaching over to Teddie, and pulled him onto himself, “Then what are you waiting for? We’re all here to have fun, right Yosuke?” As he said his name, Souji slipped a hand into Teddie’s shirt, caressing the creamy skin underneath. A flush decorated the blond’s cheeks.
“Sensei…”
The brunet’s eyes were as wide as saucers, he couldn’t believe anything of what he was seeing. It looked as if everyone was in their shadow form, but worse. These shadow versions of themselves seemed to be extremely, for lack of a better word, horny. God, what was up with them?
Out of nowhere Kanji and Naoto finally made it towards the rest as well, and boy was Yosuke in for another surprise. Everyone was fighting over who got to feel up Souji next, and who would be able to please him in other ways. It should’ve really disgusted Yosuke, but he felt himself hardening at the thought of doing said things to Souji as well. Why couldn’t he just go up to him and… Ugh.
Teddie might’ve been the most dangerous of them all, for he was already on his knees unbuckling his leader’s belt. Damn, the bear didn’t waste any time! But how the hell was he going to do, what he assumed he was going to do in front of everyone? Holy flippin’ hell.
“Teddie stop that!” Yosuke was as red as a tomato, and he had already pulled the damn bear up from his kneeling position. Everyone stared at him as if he just committed the most heinous crime known to man or shadow.
Chie scoffed, “You’re killing the mood Yosuke.”
“Yeah, you’re ruining our time together,” Rise seemed disappointed that Teddie wasn’t able to continue.
Before Yosuke had a chance to retaliate he noticed Kanji, what the? Kanji had grabbed Souji by the front of his shirt and kissed him roughly. Wonderful, even-- wait he shouldn’t have expected anything less from Kanji, right? No, what the…they both looked as if they were enjoying themselves a little too much.
I want what I haven’t got, even if it kills me trying…
“Senpai, I didn’t know… do that thing with your tongue again, it felt good,” Kanji licked the side of his leader’s mouth, and let his hands wander all over the older teen’s body.
“It’s not fair Kanji-kun, I want to try too,” Naoto said without any evident expression on her face. But Kanji nodded, and knew he had to share. What happened next even had Yosuke emitting weird sounds, as Naoto smirked a devious kind of smirk. She reached over to her senpai, and kissed him deeply, almost sweetly, until Kanji positioned himself behind Souji. And oh God, that actually looked sexy. Naoto was still going strong as she began to thrust herself against Souji, and Kanji let his hands begin to unbutton her dress shirt. When he groped one of her breasts, she moaned into the silver-haired Persona user’s mouth, in turn having him react in the same manner.
Yukiko blushed furiously as she looked over at Chie, “Wow, they’re really into it. I’m kinda feeling…”
The shorter haired brunette smirked, and grabbed Yukiko, “Let’s go, I’ll show you a good time princess Yukiko.”
“Only a good time?”
Chie licked her lips as she whispered in her ear, “The best time.”
“Now that’s the Prince Chie I know,” Yukiko bit her lip anxiously as she kissed her best friend slowly, dancing to the song still playing all the while.
Rise looked from one pair to the other, and she was beginning to feel quite left out. Well, Risette wasn’t going to let that happen. How can such a cute idol be left out of the festivities? She smiled mischievously at Teddie, “Let’s go cut in. How about it?”
“You don’t have to ask this bear twice,” Teddie grinned as he waltzed over to Kanji and Naoto along with Rise.
Everyone was getting their freak on while Yosuke still seemed to be struck by a really bad confusion spell. But everyone had someone, what about him? He was trying so hard not to let his desire take over, but it just wasn’t fair.
The small hands that were exploring Souji’s body, and how they were all into what they were doing. He couldn’t take it.
Souji parted from Naoto’s kiss, and motioned over to Yosuke who looked absolutely crestfallen. He looked directly at him chuckling sardonically, “What’s wrong? I thought this is what you assumed I was like, seeing as I have a different girl around me during intervals of the day. Even the guys seem to take a shine onto me, although, not you. Why is that?”
“Huh? When did this suddenly turn to be about me? You’re the one with the entire team manhandling you! I… You know how I am… I…”
“Really?” Souji let the rest of the investigation team continue on without him, as he walked over to Yosuke looking down at quite the obvious bulge in his pants, “Then, what’s up with that?” The pun was unintentional but if it the shoe fit, who was he to rephrase anything.
“Ugh, that’s low…Y-you’re, it’s just, everyone…”
“Would you like to join us then? I’m sure you’d get some Risette action as well, seeing as she seems to be extra willing this evening.”
Yosuke blushed, “That’s just wrong Souji, I…I don’t want any of that. I don’t want to do those things with them, I…”
“I see, then, how about with me?” The look in those gray eyes were far from teasing the brunet, but it only made the current issue worse. He closed in on him wrapping his arms around Yosuke, pulling him closer to his body as well. It sent an electrical shock up Yosuke’s spine, and he groaned. All the pent up tension, the pressure between them with the beat of the music in his head, what a combination, it was driving him insane.
I want her, she wants him, he wants me, I give in…
Everyone began to flicker in and out of the scene, but it wasn’t as if Yosuke was paying attention to his surroundings anymore. The designated DJ continued to mix it up, and roused his audience for good measure. His blond hair and greenish-blue eyes were quite the sight, all the girls present were all over him as well. Although, a redhead came from behind, shooing the fan girls away. Even if the mullet was way out of style, it suited the blond very much so. No one heard what the redhead whispered into the dirty blond’s ear, but he had closed his eyes getting more than a little distracted.
The proximity of the two male Yasogami High students were almost as if they had meshed together; they molded into their newfound closeness perfectly. Souji’s hands made their way up into the brunet’s shirt, while Yosuke was still at a loss at how to react.
I started questioning, the rules of coupling…
As if Souji knew exactly what his partner was thinking, he said in a low husky voice, “Forget about everyone else, only focus on me…” His free hand took hold of Yosuke’s arm and placed it on his shoulder, hoping that the boy would get the hint and follow the example.
Both arms were now wrapped around Souji’s neck, and Yosuke was beginning to grow more confidant. The music and the one in front of him were the only things worthy of his attention. Each beat made him less and less uptight, more buoyant and capable of letting his body take over. The friction caused by their movements, how Yosuke leaned into the crook of Souji’s neck breathing heavily, almost desperately, wanting more contact. He needed it so badly now.
Somehow they were leaning against a wall, and the next thing they knew they had their mouths hungrily invading their personal space. Not that they seemed to mind of course, but Yosuke knew everything was moving so fast. He pushed the other away, short of breath, “No, this… is wrong…”
It was Souji’s turn to begin to lose his cool as he groped Yosuke exactly where he needed attention the most, “Are you a friend or lover? Now, pick one or the other… I’m not letting you go, otherwise.”
Wonderful, now even he was repeating song lyrics that were a little too appropriate for the situation for their own good. The brunet whimpered as he bit into Souji’s shoulder, “How can I refuse… when you have your hand there.”
A smirk formed on the silver-haired teen’s face, and he resumed their previous little escapade. No buckle had to be undone, once he realized Yosuke had pajama pants on, orange, how typical. None of it mattered to Souji, it only made it easier to access that very sensitive and neglected part of his. Only a sharp gasp was heard once Souji reached his destination, “You mean here?”
The gray eyed fiend was rewarded with yet another delicious moan; it amused him greatly how desperate Yosuke’s ministrations grew with each unpredicted move Souji would make. Maybe he was taking it a little too far? Nah, of course not, he wanted it as much as he did anyway. If the way he clung onto Souji was any proof, then he really wanted it.
“Why… are you doing this?”
A stupid question was to be answered justly with an equal response of the same caliber, “Because, you want it.”
“Ugh, Souji, you know, that I’m not g-gay,” Yosuke drew his eyes away from his glance, knowing that not even he could believe the words the were coming out of his mouth anymore.
A thumb slowly rubbed over the bottom lip that quivered in hesitation, “As pretty as that mouth of yours is, you somehow continue to spew out complete and utter crap from it. For once, stop lying to yourself. At least do it for me…”
The look of disappointment in those eyes made Yosuke regret what he had just said, it was so stupid of him. Why did he keep lying to himself? If his shadow had been present, he knew exactly what he would say. There he was, alone with Souji, and he was still holding back? When did he start to grow feelings for his leader? There were so many questions, but if he attempted to go for them all at once he would overheat, more so than he was already. When his best friend’s thumb touched his lip, he leant forward as a charmed snake would.
There was time to figure things out later, right then and now he wanted Souji. There was nothing more to it; he couldn’t lie to himself anymore.
“You’ll have your way this time, partner,” Yosuke kissed the thumb that was still rubbing against his lip, proceeding to poke his tongue out sweetly licking it.
To repay Yosuke for his sudden bout of bravery, Souji placed his knee in between his legs causing as much friction as he could. His hands brushed into the auburn hair, pulling him closer for yet another frenzied kiss. His tongue explored the heat inside, and could feel the attempted muffled moans.
Yosuke thrust his hips savoring the much wanted friction, but he feared he was going to blow his lid before Souji did anything else. Although, what occurred next left the brunet a little bemused. He stopped kissing, retrieved his knee much to Yosuke’s misfortune, and wait-- he was getting on his knees? What was he… no way.
“Oh God Souji, what are you?”
The elastic of Yosuke’s pajama pants were snapped back onto his skin, and the material rubbed unexpectedly against his painfully hard erection. Without a chance to decline, Souji slipped the pants agonizingly slow revealing just how much Yosuke truly wanted the other Persona user.
“Seems to me you’re rather healthy,” Souji smirked as he pressed a finger over the slit.
Yosuke’s legs almost gave out, “Damn you, you’re sounding like a pervy old man…”
“Somehow, you’re enjoying it though,” the finger that was dangerously prodding him was already smeared in precum. The confused look of pleasure and mortification on his face amused Souji greatly, and made the wait all the worthwhile.
As if the foggy club scenario wasn’t enough, Yosuke’s vision was becoming more and more blurred. His heart skipped a beat with every touch, every whisper, every single movement to the music. Shaky hands were placed upon Souji’s shoulders, as he let his head fall back onto the support of the wall. “Please…”
If the kiss had been intense, Yosuke didn’t know how to describe the feeling of Souji’s mouth around him. He felt so high on the atmosphere, and the wet heat dominating every fiber of his being. There was no doubt about it, Souji was in control as he always was in the battlefield. The way he focused solely on making Yosuke feel so good, made him groan at the thought. In fact, he always did focus on pleasing Yosuke before anyone else. He was always first.
Why had Yosuke become jealous then?
But then he stopped. His mouth was not around him anymore, and he was already standing back up. Yosuke looked at him in disbelief, and wasn’t sure what to say. With a lick of his lips and a swift undoing of his belt, the other Persona user resumed assaulting his mouth again. His pants slid down around his ankles, and wrapped his arms around the brunet’s waist grinding his hips all the while.
“Mmph,” Yosuke’s eyes widened when he noticed his legs had been positioned on either side of Souji’s hips. It was so overwhelming at how everything was going at such a fast pace, and there---he did it again.
“What am I to you, Yosuke? I need to know if this is the only time, I ngh,” Souji licked up the brunet’s jaw line, proceeding to smother his neck with sloppy kisses. Then upon reaching his earlobe, he nibbled playfully, “Once I taste the forbidden fruit, there’s no way I could forget that easily… it’s flavor…”
It is not easy to find, anyone who captivates me, anyone deserving time…
“Stop fucking around Souji, just take me,” Yosuke whined as he clawed at Souji’s back to keep himself balanced.
“Not until I get a straight answer from you.”
“I…”
Want him.
That cold stare sent shivers down Yosuke’s spine, but most of all he wanted to continue seeing Souji disheveled, at a loss for words, losing his composure; it was all because of Yosuke Hanamura. He wanted to see him lose his mind just as he was at the moment due to Souji just being Souji. The song wouldn’t stop playing in his head either, because it was…
Love and attraction.
“Just fuck me, now.”
It’s like sex and passion.
“Not until I know, you won’t leave me.”
“What? I…dammit, let go of me if you’re not going to… finish the job.”
It’s two ends of a spectrum.
“Is that what it is then? Once you get off, it’s over?”
“Ugh…”
Souji grimaced still holding onto Yosuke’s legs, “This is not that kinda ride, Hanamura.”
“When did you start to care if people were one night stands anyway? Aren’t you leaving for good at the end of the term, huh? So who cares if it’s a one time, thing,” Yosuke glared even if he was still as hard as a rock. Even if they were both obviously not in the best terms, the heat emanating from their bodies was far from dormant.
Everybody wants someone to hold.
“Because I know you’re not like that, and you know that I’m not like that either.”
Everybody wants to choose a role.
“How are you so sure?” It was getting to be a little too much for the both of them, because they needed release badly, yet their stubborn nature was not letting them go any further.
Ain’t nobody willing to break the mold.
“I’m sorry, but… we can’t do this…”
“What?! But you’re the one that wanted to do me! You can’t leave me…”
No hint of bravery.
His vision went white, as everyone including his best friend disappeared from view. Everything from the music, the DJ, the people, the club itself, was all gone. Yosuke wasn’t even in the position he was prior; he was in the prescence of nothingness. He hadn’t felt so alone in quite a long time. Although, he mused on, it was probably all his fault. No, it was his fault.
~~~~
Sweat trickled down Yosuke’s forehead as he realized he was back in his room, with no Souji in sight. His blankets were on the floor and only one of his pillows actually remained on his bed. When he turned to get off, a rather bothersome discomfort had made itself known. Sadly, not even in his messed up dreams did he get the release he so desired.
Out of habit he turned to check his phone, and when he saw he had a missed call his heart skipped yet another beat. When did Souji call him? Everything was freaking him out immensely, and with a still disturbing dream fresh in mind he didn’t want to call Souji back. There was so way he could have a regular chit chatty conversation with him, knowing he could almost still feel his touch on his feverish skin.
He yearned for the body contact between them that his subconscious mind so confirmed. There was still a faint buzzing sound coming from his headset, letting Yosuke know he still had his mp3 player on. Wonderful, the song he was listening to before falling into that horrid vortex of God knows what was miraculous enough still playing.
His head plopped down onto the palms of his hands, “I think I’m gonna need another shower…”
For what it was worth, he was mighty grateful Teddie hadn’t woken up in the middle of Yosuke’s dream rendezvous with their leader. He was sound asleep, without a care in the world. Yosuke felt a pang of envy at the peaceful aura he had while he slept. Although, everyone knew Teddie had his own torments to deal with, so it wasn’t right of Yosuke to think such things. He couldn’t help it though.
Ignoring all the scattered useless emotions going through his head, he stood up and quietly left the room. Once he went into the bathroom, stripping himself of his clothes, the only thing that continued to linger was Souji’s last words.
We can’t do this…
He was right, they couldn’t. There were countless reasons as to why it wouldn’t be in their best interests, especially because… Partners, partners in crime they were. It would change everything, and that’s the last thing Yosuke wanted. No matter how much he truly longed to be Souji Seta’s special someone, it wasn’t meant to be. He had to continue on with the homophobe façade to protect himself from his bottled up emotions. Once everything was out in the open, there would be no false hope or expectation that one day, he would be accepted.
Even if there were times where he had a chance to seize the opportunity, as earlier that day, Yosuke couldn’t. What if he was being tested? How much could he hold back until, he couldn’t anymore?
The water soothed him once more, as he passed his hands down his body, stopping a couple of fingers away from his chest. He closed his eyes and a vivid image of a card formed in his mind’s eye. It was a boy around his age, holding within his grasp a fancy looking goblet. There seemed to be a fish leaping from it’s liquid contents, and on the bottom the words clearly said Page of Cups. Yosuke obviously knew about Tarot cards, but he never did study them. But somehow that card was trying to tell him something, and he couldn’t refuse anything or anyone at that point.
His message was a simple one as the water continued to drown his sorrows, a messenger from the realm of the heart. Yosuke knew he was shying away from his true feelings, and the Page looked into his eyes full of empathy for him. As if he knew all too well of the emotions welling up inside of Yosuke.
“You risk your life everyday fighting the unknown, why must you fear or shun away such a welcoming emotion such as love?”
“Bullshit… I don’t welcome it. I don’t want it.”
“It’s a shame though, for love has the potential to make you an even better person than you are now.”
“Heh,” Yosuke realized he was talking with himself, or so it seemed. He couldn’t believe he was arguing with an apparition; if it would only disappear.
“Open your heart, and risk loving… I guarantee you won’t regret it.”
That was the last he heard of the Page, as the card and the illusion of the young man disappeared from his consciousness. To risk loving… Even if that would leave him in a much vulnerable state, there was truth to his words. Yosuke had promised to be true to himself, and yet there he was running away from his genuine feelings.
Maybe there was more to that vision than he was giving it credit for…
~~~~
“Master, I have successfully delivered your message. I think there’s still hope for the kid yet,” The Page grinned as he bowed to his prince.
Only bright yellow amused eyes stared back at the darker haired brunet, “Good. Hopefully, I won’t have to pay him a visit personally, again. With any luck that Seta character would be there to witness his humiliation, and experience my encore.”
The other boy chuckled, “Why are humans so weak willed, master?”
“Because, without their pathetic nuisances we wouldn’t be able to manifest. So, I owe my human some gratitude.”
“Hmm,” The Page sadly looked over at the Tarot card he was summoned from, and dreaded what was to come next. But he knew that if he was obedient he would be summoned for another ordeal, making him anticipate the next message he was to deliver.
“You are dismissed.”
As the Page of cups faded away back into his card, the only other entity left in the room began to laugh maniacally.
“Until we meet again other! I know it’ll be soon enough, in time we’ll be face to face once more. Then, and only then… Heh, heh… will I… Not even he will be able to help you. I promise, you won’t be saved. Your next fuck up, will be your last.”
~~~~
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Wow, it took me forever to finally post this! I kept getting little visitors to take care of at home, so I was kinda distracted from writing. Right now I'm taking care of kiddies too, but I think I can manage. *hours later* Maybe not. >.>; This is the first official P4 fic I post on my writing journal, since most of my fics were posted at badbadbathhouse as Anon. xD So, regardless I do hope that someone enjoys this one too.
If you want to fully experience this fic, listen to this song while reading it *loser*; http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXVUvAtZJ-M
Title: Just a Page in love
Pairing: Souji/Yosuke and everyone else in the investigation team? >.>;
Rating: M
Summary: Yosuke doesn't want to get caught up in Souji's harem, but somehow the harem comes to him in a most deliciously taboo dream. But, in the end all the Magician really wants is his Fool. ( no obvious spoilers, promise. )
Authors Note: Inspired by Darren Hayes' Love and Attraction song, because it suited the mood of the fic. I didn't italicize the dream sequence because most of the fic is a dream, sorry if it confused anyone! D: Also, there is a little mini surprise for Kingdom Hearts fans, well, very little, but if anyone catches on to it bonus points to you. Why they were there is beyond me... >.>; Last, but not least there are bound to be many more Tarot references in my writing in the near future. I do hope someone enjoys said references. :)
Dedications: To anyone that reads and enjoys it. :) But, I must give extra thanks to my muse Darren Hayes, since now I cannot possibly think of writing Yosuke without involving Darren in some way. My fanfic!Yosuke admires him very much. :3
Disclaimer: Lucy is a Fag Hag through and through, but thy characters portrayed in thee smut, thou shalt not hers. Sadly, but unfortunately true.
The day before when Nanako announced that she had gone grocery shopping, Souji knew what he had to do. As in every other time the fridge had been full, it was time to make another one of his orgasmic lunches that he was known for. The best part being that he would be able to share it with any of his friends, which obviously meant some alone time with said friend. He usually liked to alternate between them, but he was making one of Yosuke’s favorite dishes, so it was honestly inevitable.
After finishing up Souji went to bed, and for some reason had anticipated tomorrow’s lunchtime like never before.
~~~~
Morning classes were over, and Souji with bento in hand walked over to Yosuke. He smiled, “Would you like to eat lunch with me?”
Yosuke didn’t even have to give it a second thought, because he knew how awesome Souji’s lunches were. Rejecting his offer was blasphemous on it’s own. The reddish brunet nodded as he grinned back, “Sure, partner! Man, I’m starving so I hope you brought enough for the both of us.”
“When haven’t I?” Souji smirked and both of them made their way to the rooftop.
That’s when it happened.
For some reason the silver haired Persona user was a little too anxious for his own good. Seriously, it felt odd. He was not the anxious type… His calm and collected nature was what he was mostly known for. He shrugged the feeling off as he opened up the bento box, and Yosuke’s eyes lit up.
“Oh yes! You made my favorite!”
Souji nodded and extended a piece of the chicken into his direction, “Here, have a bite.”
The brunet leaned in and bit into the poultry, closing his eyes savoring the texture of the recipe all together. It was incredible how the man was good at so many things, especially stuff involving his hands. Yosuke pictured his friend marinating and covering the cut slices of chicken with starch. To think Souji had put so much time into something for him…
“Like it?”
“Mmm, yes, it’s so good,” Yosuke slid his tongue over his lips, and hoped there was more where that came from.
Gray eyes practically gawked at the pink that poked out of the other’s mouth, and Souji was slightly becoming jealous of his own cooking. The look on Yosuke’s face was uncalled for, with rosy pink dusted cheeks and all. It was a look of pure bliss.
Rather, it was a mighty dangerous expression to wear in front of Souji.
Without processing any further thought the distance between them seized to be, as Souji aimed for that ever so pretty tantalizing mouth. Although, sadly, he missed and kissed the side of Yosuke’s nose instead. Before he had a chance to attempt once more, the homophobe he had for a best friend stood up instantly.
“What the-?! Souji, what the hell was that?!”
The silver-haired teen was not a man of many words, but it seemed to be more the case at that particular moment. He really didn’t have a single thing to say, and much less to him. Souji couldn’t very well tell Yosuke it was his own damn fault for teasing him the way he had. So, he decided the best course of action was to feign ignorance.
“Sorry, you had something on your nose,” Souji replied knowing it was a very lame excuse, and there was no way in the world-- not even the T.V world he was going to buy it.
Yosuke blushed a deeper red and passed his hand over his nose, “Oh, really? Well, you could’ve just told me… I mean, that was a little, um, weird. You do know that you almost kissed me? If I hadn’t---” The brunet paused at the unfazed look on his best friend’s face.
“Anyways, you can have the rest, I have to get going,” he gave the bento to Yosuke, and got up to leave.
“Wait, Souji! Where do you have to go, maybe I can come with?”
Souji merely shook his head, “Yumi wanted me to stop by drama to practice our lines if I had time during lunch. If you want to put up with drama club stuff then you’re welcome--”
Oddly, the way his friend phrased it all bothered him. He felt there was some spite thrown in the mix, and it wasn’t sitting too well for Yosuke. Why would Souji get up and leave in the middle of their lunch? Or even better question to ask himself, why did he invite him to eat lunch in the first place if he had a prior engagement? Especially with a girl… Yosuke knew he was very popular with the ladies, but Souji was never to put any chick before him. Wait, why was he putting so much thought into it all? Man, he was only going to rehearse his lines with his drama partner. He froze as the word partner lingered freshly in his mind.
Those concerned eyes stared at the brunet quizzically, “I take it you don’t want to go?”
Yosuke sighed as he took another bite off the fried chicken, “Nah, I’ll be okay. Now, don’t get frisky while rehearsing though, even if I’m sure she wouldn’t mind…”
The other teen chuckled and shook his head, “Come on, you know it’s not like that.”
“Yeah, sure, she’s practically throwing herself at you. I’m sure it is just like that.”
Souji cocked a brow, “Aw, are you interested?”
“Whoa, wait! I’m not-- I mean, interested? You know I’m not into that--” Yosuke was terribly embarrassed, and a bright crimson red to boot.
“I thought Yumi was your type though, or do you still have eyes for a certain idol?”
“Oh, Yumi, right you meant Yumi… and huh? No, way, I--” The reddish brunet couldn’t believe just how much he was stuttering, and the fact that he had considered something totally, completely-- inappropriate! Wrong, wrong, wrong. He was having a Kanji moment, and he had to rid of it immediately. The poor bento box was being tossed around like a Mr. Potato head doll. It felt even worse, considering how delicious it’s contents were, but Yosuke had to leave Souji’s sight as fast as possible. Too many unnecessary questions were making their way into his head, and he had no way of figuring out how to answer them.
“You okay? You seem really out of it,” Souji frowned knowing that Yosuke was about to have steam come out of his ears at any moment, if their line of conversation were to continue.
“Sorry, buddy, thanks for the food, but... I should get going. Don’t want to be late, or anything you know? Heh, heh,” Yosuke knew he was pushing it, and Souji was going to see right through him. Instead though, he let him go, and Yosuke hauled himself away from his presence.
Souji was indeed disappointed, in himself mostly; if only he hadn’t made that bold move they would still be having lunch. But he couldn’t hide the hurt he felt when Yosuke reacted the way he did. Then again, he should’ve known he wouldn’t have reacted in any other way. Now the food he had spent all night preparing for his best friend, was left mostly untouched and underappreciated. He picked the lunch up and made his way to the drama club, in hopes of forgetting the recent events.
It hurt even more when he realized how he used the attention girls gave him, to forget about how he felt for one Yosuke Hanamura. He suddenly felt nauseated, and made his way to the restroom. There was no way Yumi could see him like that now.
~~~~~
Yosuke couldn’t believe how fast the day went by after lunch, but he was grateful for it. He rubbed his temple still frustrated at the conversation he had earlier with Souji, but there wasn’t much he could do. Although, not being able to stop thinking about him was proving to be quite difficult for the brunet.
After making his way into his bedroom, he checked his cellphone, but no new calls. It wasn’t as if he were waiting for a particular call or anything…Or was he? Souji usually called him the afternoons they didn’t go walking home together. If Yosuke wasn’t called for Junes duty, Souji would have some sort of extra curricular going on. No matter what, he knew their time together was special. He was one of the easiest guys to talk to, and it made absolute sense that he had been assigned the position as leader.
From time to time Yosuke had to admit he would get jealous, since the guy was practically perfect. But, as he got to know his best friend more and more, he oddly started growing very fond of the dude. Besides, he had seen the worst of Yosuke and he was still there for him. If that wasn’t a true friend, he didn’t know what was.
There was a ton of homework, but he really didn’t feel like getting anything done. He was sure to regret it in the morning, but essays and mathematical equations were not on his agenda tonight. It was probably best to go to bed early, maybe in the morning he could ask Chie for answers or something. Even if he was more than certain her answers would be totally wrong, but he still had a glint of hope she got some off of Yukiko. In all honesty, he would ask Souji, but he still felt awkward about earlier. So naturally, he was out of the question.
“I might as well go shower,” Yosuke sighed and took a clean towel, closing the bedroom door behind him. Once the showerhead began to drench an overly exhausted Yosuke, a familiar ringtone felt a little lonely as it echoed in his room.
~~~~
A shower was exactly what the brunet needed, in order to temporarily forget about all the prior thoughts invading his consciousness. He dried his damp hair with his maroon colored towel, and walked over to his bed. All homework forgotten, he pulled on light orange pajama bottoms and plopped himself onto the mattress.
The lights were off, and the room was silent save for Yosuke’s tired breathing. He was trying to sleep, but it wasn’t working out as he had planned. Tossing and turning for almost two hours on end, until Yosuke took out his mp3 player and listened to some music. Thankfully, it had calmed him down some.
Listening to the current song, he couldn’t help but let his fickle mind wander off to the person he couldn’t stop thinking about. Yosuke never understood why he loved the artist he was listening to so much, considering that most of his songs revolved around love, romance, and relationships. But it’s as if this Darren Hayes character knew what he was going through most of the time. Nevermind that the man was gay, and he was mostly singing about those kind of relationships… It was just, comforting.
The song drawled on, and Yosuke let himself rest his eyes letting the sandman carry him away from reality. The real world seemed to be a real drag anyway.
~~~~~
Everything seemed different somehow, there was fog everywhere, but he knew he wasn’t in the T.V world. It was a wide open space, with hardly any lights on, and the lights that were on were used for raving. The smell of cigarettes and booze filled the air, and it was almost intoxicating. Although, Yosuke never liked either one, it was still an interesting sight to behold.
He noticed the room began to fill itself up with people dancing to no music, until a random DJ appeared and started performing. Coincidentally it was the song he was hearing before… wait, was he? No, he didn’t recognize his surroundings one bit. Where was he?
The song, every single beat made him shudder in anticipation. It was such a weird feeling, but he wanted to just bust out some moves in the middle of the dance floor. Sadly, it wouldn’t be any fun if he didn’t have anyone to mingle with.
Half naked women appeared out of nowhere, and were moving against each other in ways Yosuke wasn’t even aware could be done. But that’s not what caught his attention, no, it was a very familiar person dirty dancing with a bunch of other random women. Although, upon further inspection they weren’t random women at all.
“What the… Chie, Yukiko…? Rise? What’s going on?”
The girls were all rubbing up on Souji, touching every part of him in sight, and it made Yosuke very uncomfortable. Next thing he knew a finger was beckoning him to come to them as well, that finger was none other than of Rise Kujikawa.
“Come on Yosuke-senpai, have some fun with us!” Rise giggled as she slowly sucked on a sensitive spot on Souji’s neck causing him to grab her waist to bring her closer.
Yukiko and Chie were not as into it as Rise, but they did contribute on the leader groping. They were on either side of him, and each began to nibble on an earlobe. The music continued to boom in the background, as the words became clearer with every line sung.
Everyone that I desire, wants to be with someone else…
“What are you all doing? This is not like you Chie! And Yukiko? Rise… what the… What’s going on…?”
The four of them continued to go with the beat, and Souji smirked in Yosuke’s direction, “Don’t you like this sorta thing? Loosen up, let’s have some fun.”
“B-but, Souji, this is…” Yosuke couldn’t believe he was trying to turn down such a sweet and tempting offer. It was just so awkward, and it felt so wrong. But the thrill of it all proved to be quite enticing, and Yosuke had to admit they all looked so fucking good together. Especially him, he wanted to feel just how excited Souji looked.
Yosuke looked around and there seemed to be a lot of people at this club like atmosphere, he apparently even spotted Naoto, Kanji and Teddie somewhere in the background. Teddie seemed to want to drag them away to the dance floor, but they weren’t having any of it. Or at least not with Teddie, so he gave up on them and began to make his way up to the group. Oh no, this couldn’t end well at all.
“Oooh, Sensei seems to be having lots of fun. Teddie wants to join in too!”
Souji separated himself from the girls temporarily reaching over to Teddie, and pulled him onto himself, “Then what are you waiting for? We’re all here to have fun, right Yosuke?” As he said his name, Souji slipped a hand into Teddie’s shirt, caressing the creamy skin underneath. A flush decorated the blond’s cheeks.
“Sensei…”
The brunet’s eyes were as wide as saucers, he couldn’t believe anything of what he was seeing. It looked as if everyone was in their shadow form, but worse. These shadow versions of themselves seemed to be extremely, for lack of a better word, horny. God, what was up with them?
Out of nowhere Kanji and Naoto finally made it towards the rest as well, and boy was Yosuke in for another surprise. Everyone was fighting over who got to feel up Souji next, and who would be able to please him in other ways. It should’ve really disgusted Yosuke, but he felt himself hardening at the thought of doing said things to Souji as well. Why couldn’t he just go up to him and… Ugh.
Teddie might’ve been the most dangerous of them all, for he was already on his knees unbuckling his leader’s belt. Damn, the bear didn’t waste any time! But how the hell was he going to do, what he assumed he was going to do in front of everyone? Holy flippin’ hell.
“Teddie stop that!” Yosuke was as red as a tomato, and he had already pulled the damn bear up from his kneeling position. Everyone stared at him as if he just committed the most heinous crime known to man or shadow.
Chie scoffed, “You’re killing the mood Yosuke.”
“Yeah, you’re ruining our time together,” Rise seemed disappointed that Teddie wasn’t able to continue.
Before Yosuke had a chance to retaliate he noticed Kanji, what the? Kanji had grabbed Souji by the front of his shirt and kissed him roughly. Wonderful, even-- wait he shouldn’t have expected anything less from Kanji, right? No, what the…they both looked as if they were enjoying themselves a little too much.
I want what I haven’t got, even if it kills me trying…
“Senpai, I didn’t know… do that thing with your tongue again, it felt good,” Kanji licked the side of his leader’s mouth, and let his hands wander all over the older teen’s body.
“It’s not fair Kanji-kun, I want to try too,” Naoto said without any evident expression on her face. But Kanji nodded, and knew he had to share. What happened next even had Yosuke emitting weird sounds, as Naoto smirked a devious kind of smirk. She reached over to her senpai, and kissed him deeply, almost sweetly, until Kanji positioned himself behind Souji. And oh God, that actually looked sexy. Naoto was still going strong as she began to thrust herself against Souji, and Kanji let his hands begin to unbutton her dress shirt. When he groped one of her breasts, she moaned into the silver-haired Persona user’s mouth, in turn having him react in the same manner.
Yukiko blushed furiously as she looked over at Chie, “Wow, they’re really into it. I’m kinda feeling…”
The shorter haired brunette smirked, and grabbed Yukiko, “Let’s go, I’ll show you a good time princess Yukiko.”
“Only a good time?”
Chie licked her lips as she whispered in her ear, “The best time.”
“Now that’s the Prince Chie I know,” Yukiko bit her lip anxiously as she kissed her best friend slowly, dancing to the song still playing all the while.
Rise looked from one pair to the other, and she was beginning to feel quite left out. Well, Risette wasn’t going to let that happen. How can such a cute idol be left out of the festivities? She smiled mischievously at Teddie, “Let’s go cut in. How about it?”
“You don’t have to ask this bear twice,” Teddie grinned as he waltzed over to Kanji and Naoto along with Rise.
Everyone was getting their freak on while Yosuke still seemed to be struck by a really bad confusion spell. But everyone had someone, what about him? He was trying so hard not to let his desire take over, but it just wasn’t fair.
The small hands that were exploring Souji’s body, and how they were all into what they were doing. He couldn’t take it.
Souji parted from Naoto’s kiss, and motioned over to Yosuke who looked absolutely crestfallen. He looked directly at him chuckling sardonically, “What’s wrong? I thought this is what you assumed I was like, seeing as I have a different girl around me during intervals of the day. Even the guys seem to take a shine onto me, although, not you. Why is that?”
“Huh? When did this suddenly turn to be about me? You’re the one with the entire team manhandling you! I… You know how I am… I…”
“Really?” Souji let the rest of the investigation team continue on without him, as he walked over to Yosuke looking down at quite the obvious bulge in his pants, “Then, what’s up with that?” The pun was unintentional but if it the shoe fit, who was he to rephrase anything.
“Ugh, that’s low…Y-you’re, it’s just, everyone…”
“Would you like to join us then? I’m sure you’d get some Risette action as well, seeing as she seems to be extra willing this evening.”
Yosuke blushed, “That’s just wrong Souji, I…I don’t want any of that. I don’t want to do those things with them, I…”
“I see, then, how about with me?” The look in those gray eyes were far from teasing the brunet, but it only made the current issue worse. He closed in on him wrapping his arms around Yosuke, pulling him closer to his body as well. It sent an electrical shock up Yosuke’s spine, and he groaned. All the pent up tension, the pressure between them with the beat of the music in his head, what a combination, it was driving him insane.
I want her, she wants him, he wants me, I give in…
Everyone began to flicker in and out of the scene, but it wasn’t as if Yosuke was paying attention to his surroundings anymore. The designated DJ continued to mix it up, and roused his audience for good measure. His blond hair and greenish-blue eyes were quite the sight, all the girls present were all over him as well. Although, a redhead came from behind, shooing the fan girls away. Even if the mullet was way out of style, it suited the blond very much so. No one heard what the redhead whispered into the dirty blond’s ear, but he had closed his eyes getting more than a little distracted.
The proximity of the two male Yasogami High students were almost as if they had meshed together; they molded into their newfound closeness perfectly. Souji’s hands made their way up into the brunet’s shirt, while Yosuke was still at a loss at how to react.
I started questioning, the rules of coupling…
As if Souji knew exactly what his partner was thinking, he said in a low husky voice, “Forget about everyone else, only focus on me…” His free hand took hold of Yosuke’s arm and placed it on his shoulder, hoping that the boy would get the hint and follow the example.
Both arms were now wrapped around Souji’s neck, and Yosuke was beginning to grow more confidant. The music and the one in front of him were the only things worthy of his attention. Each beat made him less and less uptight, more buoyant and capable of letting his body take over. The friction caused by their movements, how Yosuke leaned into the crook of Souji’s neck breathing heavily, almost desperately, wanting more contact. He needed it so badly now.
Somehow they were leaning against a wall, and the next thing they knew they had their mouths hungrily invading their personal space. Not that they seemed to mind of course, but Yosuke knew everything was moving so fast. He pushed the other away, short of breath, “No, this… is wrong…”
It was Souji’s turn to begin to lose his cool as he groped Yosuke exactly where he needed attention the most, “Are you a friend or lover? Now, pick one or the other… I’m not letting you go, otherwise.”
Wonderful, now even he was repeating song lyrics that were a little too appropriate for the situation for their own good. The brunet whimpered as he bit into Souji’s shoulder, “How can I refuse… when you have your hand there.”
A smirk formed on the silver-haired teen’s face, and he resumed their previous little escapade. No buckle had to be undone, once he realized Yosuke had pajama pants on, orange, how typical. None of it mattered to Souji, it only made it easier to access that very sensitive and neglected part of his. Only a sharp gasp was heard once Souji reached his destination, “You mean here?”
The gray eyed fiend was rewarded with yet another delicious moan; it amused him greatly how desperate Yosuke’s ministrations grew with each unpredicted move Souji would make. Maybe he was taking it a little too far? Nah, of course not, he wanted it as much as he did anyway. If the way he clung onto Souji was any proof, then he really wanted it.
“Why… are you doing this?”
A stupid question was to be answered justly with an equal response of the same caliber, “Because, you want it.”
“Ugh, Souji, you know, that I’m not g-gay,” Yosuke drew his eyes away from his glance, knowing that not even he could believe the words the were coming out of his mouth anymore.
A thumb slowly rubbed over the bottom lip that quivered in hesitation, “As pretty as that mouth of yours is, you somehow continue to spew out complete and utter crap from it. For once, stop lying to yourself. At least do it for me…”
The look of disappointment in those eyes made Yosuke regret what he had just said, it was so stupid of him. Why did he keep lying to himself? If his shadow had been present, he knew exactly what he would say. There he was, alone with Souji, and he was still holding back? When did he start to grow feelings for his leader? There were so many questions, but if he attempted to go for them all at once he would overheat, more so than he was already. When his best friend’s thumb touched his lip, he leant forward as a charmed snake would.
There was time to figure things out later, right then and now he wanted Souji. There was nothing more to it; he couldn’t lie to himself anymore.
“You’ll have your way this time, partner,” Yosuke kissed the thumb that was still rubbing against his lip, proceeding to poke his tongue out sweetly licking it.
To repay Yosuke for his sudden bout of bravery, Souji placed his knee in between his legs causing as much friction as he could. His hands brushed into the auburn hair, pulling him closer for yet another frenzied kiss. His tongue explored the heat inside, and could feel the attempted muffled moans.
Yosuke thrust his hips savoring the much wanted friction, but he feared he was going to blow his lid before Souji did anything else. Although, what occurred next left the brunet a little bemused. He stopped kissing, retrieved his knee much to Yosuke’s misfortune, and wait-- he was getting on his knees? What was he… no way.
“Oh God Souji, what are you?”
The elastic of Yosuke’s pajama pants were snapped back onto his skin, and the material rubbed unexpectedly against his painfully hard erection. Without a chance to decline, Souji slipped the pants agonizingly slow revealing just how much Yosuke truly wanted the other Persona user.
“Seems to me you’re rather healthy,” Souji smirked as he pressed a finger over the slit.
Yosuke’s legs almost gave out, “Damn you, you’re sounding like a pervy old man…”
“Somehow, you’re enjoying it though,” the finger that was dangerously prodding him was already smeared in precum. The confused look of pleasure and mortification on his face amused Souji greatly, and made the wait all the worthwhile.
As if the foggy club scenario wasn’t enough, Yosuke’s vision was becoming more and more blurred. His heart skipped a beat with every touch, every whisper, every single movement to the music. Shaky hands were placed upon Souji’s shoulders, as he let his head fall back onto the support of the wall. “Please…”
If the kiss had been intense, Yosuke didn’t know how to describe the feeling of Souji’s mouth around him. He felt so high on the atmosphere, and the wet heat dominating every fiber of his being. There was no doubt about it, Souji was in control as he always was in the battlefield. The way he focused solely on making Yosuke feel so good, made him groan at the thought. In fact, he always did focus on pleasing Yosuke before anyone else. He was always first.
Why had Yosuke become jealous then?
But then he stopped. His mouth was not around him anymore, and he was already standing back up. Yosuke looked at him in disbelief, and wasn’t sure what to say. With a lick of his lips and a swift undoing of his belt, the other Persona user resumed assaulting his mouth again. His pants slid down around his ankles, and wrapped his arms around the brunet’s waist grinding his hips all the while.
“Mmph,” Yosuke’s eyes widened when he noticed his legs had been positioned on either side of Souji’s hips. It was so overwhelming at how everything was going at such a fast pace, and there---he did it again.
“What am I to you, Yosuke? I need to know if this is the only time, I ngh,” Souji licked up the brunet’s jaw line, proceeding to smother his neck with sloppy kisses. Then upon reaching his earlobe, he nibbled playfully, “Once I taste the forbidden fruit, there’s no way I could forget that easily… it’s flavor…”
It is not easy to find, anyone who captivates me, anyone deserving time…
“Stop fucking around Souji, just take me,” Yosuke whined as he clawed at Souji’s back to keep himself balanced.
“Not until I get a straight answer from you.”
“I…”
Want him.
That cold stare sent shivers down Yosuke’s spine, but most of all he wanted to continue seeing Souji disheveled, at a loss for words, losing his composure; it was all because of Yosuke Hanamura. He wanted to see him lose his mind just as he was at the moment due to Souji just being Souji. The song wouldn’t stop playing in his head either, because it was…
Love and attraction.
“Just fuck me, now.”
It’s like sex and passion.
“Not until I know, you won’t leave me.”
“What? I…dammit, let go of me if you’re not going to… finish the job.”
It’s two ends of a spectrum.
“Is that what it is then? Once you get off, it’s over?”
“Ugh…”
Souji grimaced still holding onto Yosuke’s legs, “This is not that kinda ride, Hanamura.”
“When did you start to care if people were one night stands anyway? Aren’t you leaving for good at the end of the term, huh? So who cares if it’s a one time, thing,” Yosuke glared even if he was still as hard as a rock. Even if they were both obviously not in the best terms, the heat emanating from their bodies was far from dormant.
Everybody wants someone to hold.
“Because I know you’re not like that, and you know that I’m not like that either.”
Everybody wants to choose a role.
“How are you so sure?” It was getting to be a little too much for the both of them, because they needed release badly, yet their stubborn nature was not letting them go any further.
Ain’t nobody willing to break the mold.
“I’m sorry, but… we can’t do this…”
“What?! But you’re the one that wanted to do me! You can’t leave me…”
No hint of bravery.
His vision went white, as everyone including his best friend disappeared from view. Everything from the music, the DJ, the people, the club itself, was all gone. Yosuke wasn’t even in the position he was prior; he was in the prescence of nothingness. He hadn’t felt so alone in quite a long time. Although, he mused on, it was probably all his fault. No, it was his fault.
~~~~
Sweat trickled down Yosuke’s forehead as he realized he was back in his room, with no Souji in sight. His blankets were on the floor and only one of his pillows actually remained on his bed. When he turned to get off, a rather bothersome discomfort had made itself known. Sadly, not even in his messed up dreams did he get the release he so desired.
Out of habit he turned to check his phone, and when he saw he had a missed call his heart skipped yet another beat. When did Souji call him? Everything was freaking him out immensely, and with a still disturbing dream fresh in mind he didn’t want to call Souji back. There was so way he could have a regular chit chatty conversation with him, knowing he could almost still feel his touch on his feverish skin.
He yearned for the body contact between them that his subconscious mind so confirmed. There was still a faint buzzing sound coming from his headset, letting Yosuke know he still had his mp3 player on. Wonderful, the song he was listening to before falling into that horrid vortex of God knows what was miraculous enough still playing.
His head plopped down onto the palms of his hands, “I think I’m gonna need another shower…”
For what it was worth, he was mighty grateful Teddie hadn’t woken up in the middle of Yosuke’s dream rendezvous with their leader. He was sound asleep, without a care in the world. Yosuke felt a pang of envy at the peaceful aura he had while he slept. Although, everyone knew Teddie had his own torments to deal with, so it wasn’t right of Yosuke to think such things. He couldn’t help it though.
Ignoring all the scattered useless emotions going through his head, he stood up and quietly left the room. Once he went into the bathroom, stripping himself of his clothes, the only thing that continued to linger was Souji’s last words.
We can’t do this…
He was right, they couldn’t. There were countless reasons as to why it wouldn’t be in their best interests, especially because… Partners, partners in crime they were. It would change everything, and that’s the last thing Yosuke wanted. No matter how much he truly longed to be Souji Seta’s special someone, it wasn’t meant to be. He had to continue on with the homophobe façade to protect himself from his bottled up emotions. Once everything was out in the open, there would be no false hope or expectation that one day, he would be accepted.
Even if there were times where he had a chance to seize the opportunity, as earlier that day, Yosuke couldn’t. What if he was being tested? How much could he hold back until, he couldn’t anymore?
The water soothed him once more, as he passed his hands down his body, stopping a couple of fingers away from his chest. He closed his eyes and a vivid image of a card formed in his mind’s eye. It was a boy around his age, holding within his grasp a fancy looking goblet. There seemed to be a fish leaping from it’s liquid contents, and on the bottom the words clearly said Page of Cups. Yosuke obviously knew about Tarot cards, but he never did study them. But somehow that card was trying to tell him something, and he couldn’t refuse anything or anyone at that point.
His message was a simple one as the water continued to drown his sorrows, a messenger from the realm of the heart. Yosuke knew he was shying away from his true feelings, and the Page looked into his eyes full of empathy for him. As if he knew all too well of the emotions welling up inside of Yosuke.
“You risk your life everyday fighting the unknown, why must you fear or shun away such a welcoming emotion such as love?”
“Bullshit… I don’t welcome it. I don’t want it.”
“It’s a shame though, for love has the potential to make you an even better person than you are now.”
“Heh,” Yosuke realized he was talking with himself, or so it seemed. He couldn’t believe he was arguing with an apparition; if it would only disappear.
“Open your heart, and risk loving… I guarantee you won’t regret it.”
That was the last he heard of the Page, as the card and the illusion of the young man disappeared from his consciousness. To risk loving… Even if that would leave him in a much vulnerable state, there was truth to his words. Yosuke had promised to be true to himself, and yet there he was running away from his genuine feelings.
Maybe there was more to that vision than he was giving it credit for…
~~~~
“Master, I have successfully delivered your message. I think there’s still hope for the kid yet,” The Page grinned as he bowed to his prince.
Only bright yellow amused eyes stared back at the darker haired brunet, “Good. Hopefully, I won’t have to pay him a visit personally, again. With any luck that Seta character would be there to witness his humiliation, and experience my encore.”
The other boy chuckled, “Why are humans so weak willed, master?”
“Because, without their pathetic nuisances we wouldn’t be able to manifest. So, I owe my human some gratitude.”
“Hmm,” The Page sadly looked over at the Tarot card he was summoned from, and dreaded what was to come next. But he knew that if he was obedient he would be summoned for another ordeal, making him anticipate the next message he was to deliver.
“You are dismissed.”
As the Page of cups faded away back into his card, the only other entity left in the room began to laugh maniacally.
“Until we meet again other! I know it’ll be soon enough, in time we’ll be face to face once more. Then, and only then… Heh, heh… will I… Not even he will be able to help you. I promise, you won’t be saved. Your next fuck up, will be your last.”
~~~~