[Redd turns his communicator on, beginning a video feed. The camera is pointed toward his face, and he makes a noisy show of clearing his throat to draw everyone's attention.]

Attention, attention, duckies, loveys, poppets and five legged schnoodle-pepper avayas! Captain Redd has a very, very important announcement to make.

[He pauses, staring ( Read more... )

Click to view

I hope you're all having a simply marvelous time!

[A rattling and a croaking in the background.]

My beautiful heron, you don't need a bikini, you have your gorgeous feathers to keep your modesty--

[Crash! Bang! Thunk! CROOOOAK, flap, flap. Redd's horrified screech.]

MY SWEET! Your exquisite legs tangled in the straps! I'll save you! That's my ( Read more... )