You Found Me - YouFoundMe!Verse Chapter 7/7 + Epilogue
Title: You found Me
Author:
rupie88
Pairing: Jensen/Jared and others.
Verse: YouFoundMe!Verse
Summary: Jared's had it tough and its even tougher out on his own, especially when you carry a few emotional scars from your past.
Warning: I would say graphic Suicide attempt, emotional abuse, swearing, mentions of past physical violence and schmoop.
Rating: PG 13 for this chapter.
Disclaimer: Its all lies people
Beta: Thanks to
deanbear25 for the incredible beta work, I'm pretty sure I didn't make the job easy. *hugs* And I fiddled with this chapter after so any mistakes are my own.
A/N Title stolen from Kelly Clarkson, obviously.
Thank you to every one that has commented and read this fic. You guys are awesome and I'm sad this is the last part.
Previous: Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Interlude - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6
You found me
When no one else was lookin'
How did you know just where I would be?
Yeah, you broke through
All of my confusion
The ups and the downs
And you still didn't leave
I guess that you saw what nobody could see
You found me
You found me
"You Found Me" - Kelly Clarkson
Jared was discharged from hospital a few hours after his psych evaluation. He was given a list of instructions to help mend his arm and prevent infection as well as a scheduled time for a therapy session. The first appointment was for Jared only so that way the counselor could have an understanding of Jared and what was best for him.
When they got back to Jared's flat Jensen helped Jared onto the couch not that he really needed it.
“Jen I’m fine really. It’s only my arm and I can still walk and talk all by myself thanks”.
“I know that Jay but I want to help you ok. Do you want something to eat; you must be hungry by now.”
“Yeah I could really go some food.”
“What do you want, peanut butter and Jelly sandwich or a peanut butter sandwich?”
“Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich sounds good” Jared said chuckling.
While Jensen got busy making Jared his sandwich, Jared got himself comfortable on the couch. He stuffed a pillow behind his back propping his back against the side of the couch. He was just pulling a blanket over his legs when Jensen walked into the room with his sandwich.
“You comfy Jay?” Jensen asked softly.
“Yeah I will be.” Jared said as he lifted the blanket up and spread his legs, signaling for Jensen to sit between them. Jensen did as Jared asked.
"Thanks Jen.” Jared took the plate from Jensen and proceeded to stuff his mouth.
“It’s ok really.” Jensen said as he ran his hand up and down Jared’s leg.
When Jared finished he passed the plate to Jensen to place on the table before he began softly kissing the older mans neck. “I love you, Jen”.
Jensen reached around for Jared’s hand. “I love you too babe”.
Epilogue
2 Months Later
Jared and Jensen attended counseling sessions three times a week for nearly two months. Their counselor was an elderly woman by the name of Lauren. She was in her late 50's and short with no dress sense. She didn't judge the boys, she helped them talk about everything and their relationship blossomed because of her help and understanding. She helped Jared find his place in the world; accepting who he was and learning to open up to others and trust people more.
Jared's confidence grew in leaps and bounds and the day he finally told Jensen what he was feeling was the day Lauren said he had one final step to make and then he would be free.
The one final step Jared needed to make would be to rid him of any doubt, fear and anger. It was to finally let his family go. It had been well over a year and his family had still not accepted their son.
So that was why Jared dialed a number he never thought he would again. He tried to remember what he wanted to say, what he needed to say. He felt so much stronger with Jensen by his side holding his hand. The phone only rang a couple of times before he heard that familiar voice say hello.
“It’s me Jared, don’t hang up please there’s some stuff I need to say.” Jared said rushed.
Jared’s mother showed no emotion in her voice, just a cold and flat “go on then.”
Jared breathed a heavy sigh before he began. Right now was the beginning of his forever.
“Mom" Jared started, "I’m letting go. I’m letting go of all the bitterness, the disappointment, the anger, all of it. I don’t need it in my life. I’m finally happy, I’ve met someone and I love him, so I’ve just rung to say goodbye. You obviously still hate me and are upset with my decision and if you can’t accept me being gay then I can’t accept you being my family. I have a new family now, one I share with Jen, Ma, Chad, Mac and Josh. I’ll be up after Christmas to get the rest of my belongings then I’ll no longer be an issue for you to deal with.”
God it felt good to get it all out, even if she simply hung up, the air felt clear and he felt relieved knowing that it was their choice not to have contact with him, not his fault.
“If that’s what you want Jared.” Jared’s mom said coldly.
That made Jared so angry. “It’s not what I want; it’s what you want. This isn’t my fault, you said goodbye first and now I finally have to courage to say it back. I’ll see you in a few weeks. Goodbye.” Jared hung up before she could say anything.
He immediately fell into Jensen’s waiting arms. He clung to him tight and buried his head in Jensen’s neck.
“It’s ok Jared I got you; just let it all out babe”. Jensen said soothingly rubbing his hand up and down Jared’s back.
“I’m not sad, I’m just relieved. My head finally doesn’t feel as cloudy and my shoulders don’t feel as heavy. I don't feel guily anymore.”
Jensen smiled “I’m so proud of you. You did so well and Jared I have something to tell you.”
Jared looked up, his eyes bright, “What is it?”
“I know its three weeks till Christmas and I know it’s going to be hard for you with out your family.”
Jared sighed, “You’re my family now Jen. You, Ma, Chad, Mac and Josh.”
“Yeah I know babe but its still not the same is it? That’s why this Christmas should be special. It should be at home, our home.”
Jared looked into Jensen's eye confused. “What are you talking about Jen?”
Jensen handed Jared a small box.
“What’s this Jen?” Jared looking from the box in his hand back to Jensen then to the box again.
“Open it.”
Jared opened it carefully only to find a key engraved Home and a silver ring.
“What’s this mean Jensen?” Jared asked in awe.
“That key is to our new home, our own little apartment and the ring is to say I’m committed to you, it’s a promise ring.” Jensen said blushing
“Jen.” Jared whispered before he gasped. “I don’t have one for you though".
Jensen pulled another ring from his pocket. “I got one in case you said yes.”
“Of course I’d say yes.” Jared took the ring from Jensen’s palm and placed it on Jensen's finger, Jensen then did the same with Jared.
Jared looked down at the key in his hand, the engraving shimmering with light. “I can’t believe we have our own place. God I love you so damn much all the fuckin time.”
“Love you too babe, always.” Jensen said before he lent forward and placed a kiss to Jared's warm lips.
“Jensen this is going to sound so gay and sappy but" he paused for a moment "I promise you my mind, body and soul forever and always.” Jared mumbled against Jensen's lips.
Jensen pulled back to look into Jared's eyes. “I promise you my friendship, my love and my heart to you forever and always Jared”
Jared didn't want to cry but it didn't stop the single tear from rolling down his cheek as he fiddled with the ring on his finger.
“Come one I wanna go tell Ma” Jared said as he grabbed Jensen’s hand and threaded their fingers together. He snatched the keys off the table and pulled Jensen out the door. As they walked down the street the sun on their backs, their joined hands swinging between them, Jared looked down and saw the flicker of light from his ring. He may have just closed one door forever but at least he’ll walk through the next one along side his partner for life.
I'll be doing a little music post in the next few days. It will have the title tracks as well as some other songs that helped me write this fic. ♥♥♥
Author:
rupie88
Pairing: Jensen/Jared and others.
Verse: YouFoundMe!Verse
Summary: Jared's had it tough and its even tougher out on his own, especially when you carry a few emotional scars from your past.
Warning: I would say graphic Suicide attempt, emotional abuse, swearing, mentions of past physical violence and schmoop.
Rating: PG 13 for this chapter.
Disclaimer: Its all lies people
Beta: Thanks to
deanbear25 for the incredible beta work, I'm pretty sure I didn't make the job easy. *hugs* And I fiddled with this chapter after so any mistakes are my own.
A/N Title stolen from Kelly Clarkson, obviously.
Thank you to every one that has commented and read this fic. You guys are awesome and I'm sad this is the last part.
Previous: Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Interlude - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6
You found me
When no one else was lookin'
How did you know just where I would be?
Yeah, you broke through
All of my confusion
The ups and the downs
And you still didn't leave
I guess that you saw what nobody could see
You found me
You found me
"You Found Me" - Kelly Clarkson
Jared was discharged from hospital a few hours after his psych evaluation. He was given a list of instructions to help mend his arm and prevent infection as well as a scheduled time for a therapy session. The first appointment was for Jared only so that way the counselor could have an understanding of Jared and what was best for him.
When they got back to Jared's flat Jensen helped Jared onto the couch not that he really needed it.
“Jen I’m fine really. It’s only my arm and I can still walk and talk all by myself thanks”.
“I know that Jay but I want to help you ok. Do you want something to eat; you must be hungry by now.”
“Yeah I could really go some food.”
“What do you want, peanut butter and Jelly sandwich or a peanut butter sandwich?”
“Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich sounds good” Jared said chuckling.
While Jensen got busy making Jared his sandwich, Jared got himself comfortable on the couch. He stuffed a pillow behind his back propping his back against the side of the couch. He was just pulling a blanket over his legs when Jensen walked into the room with his sandwich.
“You comfy Jay?” Jensen asked softly.
“Yeah I will be.” Jared said as he lifted the blanket up and spread his legs, signaling for Jensen to sit between them. Jensen did as Jared asked.
"Thanks Jen.” Jared took the plate from Jensen and proceeded to stuff his mouth.
“It’s ok really.” Jensen said as he ran his hand up and down Jared’s leg.
When Jared finished he passed the plate to Jensen to place on the table before he began softly kissing the older mans neck. “I love you, Jen”.
Jensen reached around for Jared’s hand. “I love you too babe”.
Epilogue
2 Months Later
Jared and Jensen attended counseling sessions three times a week for nearly two months. Their counselor was an elderly woman by the name of Lauren. She was in her late 50's and short with no dress sense. She didn't judge the boys, she helped them talk about everything and their relationship blossomed because of her help and understanding. She helped Jared find his place in the world; accepting who he was and learning to open up to others and trust people more.
Jared's confidence grew in leaps and bounds and the day he finally told Jensen what he was feeling was the day Lauren said he had one final step to make and then he would be free.
The one final step Jared needed to make would be to rid him of any doubt, fear and anger. It was to finally let his family go. It had been well over a year and his family had still not accepted their son.
So that was why Jared dialed a number he never thought he would again. He tried to remember what he wanted to say, what he needed to say. He felt so much stronger with Jensen by his side holding his hand. The phone only rang a couple of times before he heard that familiar voice say hello.
“It’s me Jared, don’t hang up please there’s some stuff I need to say.” Jared said rushed.
Jared’s mother showed no emotion in her voice, just a cold and flat “go on then.”
Jared breathed a heavy sigh before he began. Right now was the beginning of his forever.
“Mom" Jared started, "I’m letting go. I’m letting go of all the bitterness, the disappointment, the anger, all of it. I don’t need it in my life. I’m finally happy, I’ve met someone and I love him, so I’ve just rung to say goodbye. You obviously still hate me and are upset with my decision and if you can’t accept me being gay then I can’t accept you being my family. I have a new family now, one I share with Jen, Ma, Chad, Mac and Josh. I’ll be up after Christmas to get the rest of my belongings then I’ll no longer be an issue for you to deal with.”
God it felt good to get it all out, even if she simply hung up, the air felt clear and he felt relieved knowing that it was their choice not to have contact with him, not his fault.
“If that’s what you want Jared.” Jared’s mom said coldly.
That made Jared so angry. “It’s not what I want; it’s what you want. This isn’t my fault, you said goodbye first and now I finally have to courage to say it back. I’ll see you in a few weeks. Goodbye.” Jared hung up before she could say anything.
He immediately fell into Jensen’s waiting arms. He clung to him tight and buried his head in Jensen’s neck.
“It’s ok Jared I got you; just let it all out babe”. Jensen said soothingly rubbing his hand up and down Jared’s back.
“I’m not sad, I’m just relieved. My head finally doesn’t feel as cloudy and my shoulders don’t feel as heavy. I don't feel guily anymore.”
Jensen smiled “I’m so proud of you. You did so well and Jared I have something to tell you.”
Jared looked up, his eyes bright, “What is it?”
“I know its three weeks till Christmas and I know it’s going to be hard for you with out your family.”
Jared sighed, “You’re my family now Jen. You, Ma, Chad, Mac and Josh.”
“Yeah I know babe but its still not the same is it? That’s why this Christmas should be special. It should be at home, our home.”
Jared looked into Jensen's eye confused. “What are you talking about Jen?”
Jensen handed Jared a small box.
“What’s this Jen?” Jared looking from the box in his hand back to Jensen then to the box again.
“Open it.”
Jared opened it carefully only to find a key engraved Home and a silver ring.
“What’s this mean Jensen?” Jared asked in awe.
“That key is to our new home, our own little apartment and the ring is to say I’m committed to you, it’s a promise ring.” Jensen said blushing
“Jen.” Jared whispered before he gasped. “I don’t have one for you though".
Jensen pulled another ring from his pocket. “I got one in case you said yes.”
“Of course I’d say yes.” Jared took the ring from Jensen’s palm and placed it on Jensen's finger, Jensen then did the same with Jared.
Jared looked down at the key in his hand, the engraving shimmering with light. “I can’t believe we have our own place. God I love you so damn much all the fuckin time.”
“Love you too babe, always.” Jensen said before he lent forward and placed a kiss to Jared's warm lips.
“Jensen this is going to sound so gay and sappy but" he paused for a moment "I promise you my mind, body and soul forever and always.” Jared mumbled against Jensen's lips.
Jensen pulled back to look into Jared's eyes. “I promise you my friendship, my love and my heart to you forever and always Jared”
Jared didn't want to cry but it didn't stop the single tear from rolling down his cheek as he fiddled with the ring on his finger.
“Come one I wanna go tell Ma” Jared said as he grabbed Jensen’s hand and threaded their fingers together. He snatched the keys off the table and pulled Jensen out the door. As they walked down the street the sun on their backs, their joined hands swinging between them, Jared looked down and saw the flicker of light from his ring. He may have just closed one door forever but at least he’ll walk through the next one along side his partner for life.
I'll be doing a little music post in the next few days. It will have the title tracks as well as some other songs that helped me write this fic. ♥♥♥