Nobody's Home - YouFoundMe!Verse Chapter 2/7
His Momma could never say thank you enough for the ease that Jensen gave her growing up. He was always the polite one that would sneak around corners and have the occasional cigarette or a chug on the whiskey.
His Momma wasn't blind nor stupid so she new exactly what her son was up to. Just like the time he snuck his first boyfriend into his bedroom, after that she secretly placed condoms and lube in his top draw. He was 17 after all and he would do it anyway, at least this way she new he was safe. That was until she saw his eyes light up when she introduced Jared to him.
***
Jensen rarely went a day without thinking about Jared. Thinking about how Jared had his own place at sixteen and didn't have his parents nagging him all the time.
Jared rarely went a day without thinking about Jensen. Thinking about how Jensen had life so well, a home, a family who loved him and probably had heaps of friends.
What they both didn't realize was that things weren’t always as they seem.
After about 2 weeks of small chatter at the end of their shifts and because Jared's house was on the way to Jensen's they would sometimes walk home together, mostly for the sake of company on Jared's part and because Jensen just wanted to get to know Jared more.
Jensen was told by his Momma to ask Jared if he'd like to come over for dinner. Despite never really hanging they had become close friends. So one afternoon while walking home Jensen finally did.
"Hey Jared, are you doing anything tonight cos my Ma want's to know if you wanna come round for dinner? It's ok if you can't cos it's late notice or if you don't want to cos we haven't known each other very long or whatever." Jensen realized he was babbling, but he didn't care, he was nervous and a little freaked out.
Jared smiled, Jensen was nervous and it was written all over his face. Jared didn't remember the last time had eaten a home cooked meal, let alone eaten at somebody else's house because trust Jared, a person can only eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for so long before your taste buds become numb to the taste.
"Um yeah sure sounds good. What time does your Ma want me there?"
Jensen smiled, relieved, "Six."
"Well I'll see you at six tonight then." Jared turned and walked towards his front door leaving quickly before he said something stupid and put his foot in it.
***
Jared couldn't remember the last time he had smelt roast chicken and vegetables. It reminded him of summer at home. Hot sunlight heating the air, making him sweat, skin sticking to clothes, clothes sticking to chairs. The smell reminded him of a family he didn't have. It stung a little but he had coped before and he could do it again. Jared just plastered a huge smile and a twinkle in his eye and headed towards the kitchen to greet everyone.
Ms Ackles was standing in front of the stove turning the roasted potatoes; Josh was playing a video game while Mac was quietly reading at the dinner table.
"Ms Ackles, thank you for inviting me over for dinner." Jared said smiling.
"The pleasures all mine and please call me Donna."
Jared licked his lips as he breathed in the aroma. "It smells delicious, Donna."
"Thank you Jared, there's still a few minutes till it will be ready so Jensen why don't you show Jared around?"
"Yeah ok Momma. Come on I'll give you the complementary tour," Jensen said, turning to face Jared.
"Yeah ok," Jared said, grinning.
Their home was a three bedroom house with a kitchen, bathroom, lounge room and a laundry. Nothing too extraordinary or different to the home he once had. It had a homey feel, a lived in feeling, full of love and comfort. He only wished that his flat felt like that.
Dinner was delicious. It was the best meal he had in nearly a year. The meal was full of talk about the goings on in life and meaningless questions.
At first Jared was a little surprised that no one asked him about his family or why he was living here on his own, they had to be suspicious. He never talked about them, dodged questions about anything to do with family and why his family was never around. If they weren't going to ask he most definitely wasn't going to tell and certainly not spend his time questioning it.
Besides no one would really want to be friends with someone whose own family disowned him. Life was easier living in a reality of fake smiles, ignorance and half hearted hugs. At least people pretended to like him.
In the end he just figured if they were going to respect his privacy about his family, he would do the same and not bring up the fact that he had never seen or heard Jensen talk about his dad ever.
Desert was still the best part of the meal. Donna made a mean home made apple pie with ice cream and if Donna was going to offer Jared three or more servings who was Jared to say no.
After dinner the boys headed straight to Jensen's bedroom for the big show down. Apparently Jared told Jensen straight faced that he was going to set the new high score on Tony Hawk Two Underground.
It took just over an hour before Jensen could reclaim the high score, even if it was only by eight points. He was still number one so in the end that's all that really mattered.
They talked to each other like they were best friends since they were born, like it was the most natural thing in the world. Jensen kind of figured Jared would be wondering about his absent father so he decided to beat him too it, decided to get it all out in the open.
"You can ask me you know," Jensen said.
Jared looked at him confused, "Ask you what?"
"About my dad." Jensen said sighing.
"It’s not any of my business; you want me to know you'll tell me, it works both ways."
"Ok, well, I want to tell you."
"Ok shoot then, I'm all ears."
"My dad left when I was a few months old," Jensen started. "He came back about three years later, but left again before the twins were born, Mac and Josh. He's a dead beat, no good father who didn't do anything unless he benefited from it. I've never seen him since and I'm happy for that. Life is hard but I would never wish for the shit my Momma went through for him, he's not worth it. It's always going to be Ma, Mac, Josh and Me."
That was kinda what Jared had figured well not that Jensen's dad sounded like an ass but that his parents weren't together. "I'm sorry Jensen, that's sucks big time."
Jensen half chuckled, "Yeah, well, that's life I guess."
"Well you shouldn't have to live with such a heavy burden."
"Yeah well that's life I guess," Jensen said with a grin.
"You wanna go another round of Tony Hawk?" Jared asked trying to distract Jensen from the question that was written all over his face.
"So I take it you don't wanna talk about your family or should I say lack of it?"
Jard was hoping Jensen wouldn't go there but he did, the charade was over now. No more hiding, no more secrets, just back to being alone and cold.
"No." Jared answered coldly.
"You sure?" Jensen pushed.
"Yes."
"Just so you know when you do want to tell me, I'll be ready to listen."
Jared looked up at Jensen hesitantly, "Okay."
Jared knew it was coming. That was the question he hated with so much passion, that was the question that stopped him from making real friends. Except this was the first time somebody actually respected his answer and had not pushed the issue. It was the first time somebody had cared enough to let it slide.
Sure he had Chad, but Jensen was different. Chad had two loving parents, a roof over his head, friends, money and a promised collage education. Jensen was kind of broken like Jared. Life had dealt them both a shitty hand. He didn't have the expectation of people who have life handed to them on a silver platter. It was nice to feel in the same league for once.
With all being said about the issue they got back to the pressing issue of the night, Tony Hawke. They played the play station and drank hot chocolate before Jared decided it was time to head home, by then it was just after midnight.
Jensen yawned, "You can crash on the couch tonight, if you want."
"Um I don't think that's such a good idea, I'll just go home."
"Is this another one of those 'I don't want to talk about it subjects'?" Jensen asked
"Yes."
"Ok well at least let me walk you home."
"I'm not a baby," Jared said sternly.
"Come on you've seen inside my house let me see inside yours."
The silence gave Jensen enough time to think. Technically he had never seen Jared enter the house he always stopped in front of it. He walked up the path but he had never seen him actually open the door and walk inside.
"Do you even have a house; you're not living on the streets, are you?” Jensen asked seriously. That would explain a lot. It would explain why Jared was all skin and bones, why his parents weren't around and why his only friend was that guy he worked with.
Jared on the other hand was a little unsure on how to take someone who cared so much, so he just stared.
"…."
Jensen couldn't believe it, the thought had never crossed his mind before. "OMG you are living on the streets? That's it you're on the couch, I don't care what you say."
"Dude calm down." Jared mentally kicked himself for not answering sooner. "I have a flat near here ok? So take it easy. I know what you're thinking ok but I was embarrassed and the house I was supposedly living in is actually Chad's. I'm going home to sleep at my place because this is another one of those 'I don't want to talk about it subjects' ok?” Jared said hoping Jensen wouldn't push the issue further.
Jensen breathed a sigh of relief but by the look on Jared's face Jensen’s thinking face must had been showing.
Jensen straightened up, "You have a lot of those subjects don't you?"
Jared chuckled "Yeah maybe one day I'll fill you in on the rest. Night Jen, see you later."
"Night Jay," Jensen said closing the door behind him.
If anybody was to ask them, that was the moment they became best friends. After that they spent every waking moment together. Sometimes they would hang out at Jensen's house having dinner or just hanging out; sometimes it would be kicking a ball around the park. They were practically living out of each others back pockets. Jensen didn't mind and obviously neither did Jared.
They talked about everything from dreams, ideas and hopes. Jensen was happy with how much Jared had opened up to him even if he still hadn't told him about his parents. Jared never told him he was gay but you'd have to be blind Freddy not to notice him NOT checking out girls and giving a sneaking glance at boys.
If Jensen was a girl then most people would think they were dating. But he wasn't and the proof of that was his hard on tented in his pants. Jensen was2 a guy and he didn't even know if he wanted to push Jared that way or if Jared was that way to begn with.
Jared was oblivious or pretending to be oblivious. He thought maybe Jensen was gay but he wasn't sure. Chad told him about how Jensen was sucking some guy off while he still had a girlfriend. He wasn't sure what to believe, why somebody would say cruel things like that if they weren't true but why would Jensen have a girlfriend and a boyfriend? It was all so confusing for Jared. Even though he was sixteen and a half he had lived a sheltered life on somethings compared to people his age. He was still very much a virgin in every sense of the word. Never kissed, held hands or even cuddled a guy or anybody for that matter romantically, nor was he inclined too. Jared knew all about surviving on nothing and watching his own back, he knew how it felt to be alone and not feel loved but he didn't know what it felt like to part of something bigger, something whole and meaningful. It was his own fault for not trying to change and by doing that he didn't fit in anymore.
So that was why Jared couldn't work out whether Jensen was gay, straight, bi or what ever he was into. But Jared soon got his answers. It was about three weeks after Jensen had first invited Jared over for dinner.
The night started out like normal, home cooked meal and then video games.
When Jared and Jensen were playing around in Jensen's bedroom, things took a more physical side. What started out as shoulder bumps and elbow jabs soon turned into a wrestling match, pillows included. Jensen had Jared pinned and Jensen held his arms above his head while using his body weight to hold Jared still underneath him.
That was the moment both the boys got the answers they were after. Jensen leaned down and cautiously placed his lips on Jared's. His tongue swiping at Jared's bottom lip before trying to lick his way into his mouth. It only lasted about five seconds before Jared started shaking and squirming trying to buck Jensen off.
That was the moment Jensen found out Jared didn't want to go there and that was the moment Jared found out Jensen really did suck that guy off.
Jensen immediately started apologizing. "I'm sorry Jay, I'm really sorry."
Jared didn't hear him though, caught up in his own mind and just running on auto. "I can't do this, we can't do this."
"Wha… what? Why?"
"I can do this, we can't do this." Jared repeated like broken record.
"Jay calm down. Come on breathe for me."
"I… I'm sorry Jensen but it can’t happen ok. I…I um I don't want to be like that. I… you…we can't. I just want to be your friend. Can we just be friends please?"
"Jay its ok, if that's what you really want, well just pretend it never happened ok?"'
Jared breathed a sigh of relief, "Friends yeah, I'm sorry Jen."
"Don't be. So um you still wanna play the play station?"
Jared started looking down and scuffing his feet. "Um… nah if it's cool I'm thinking I might head home. Got some stuff I need to do is all."
"That's fine Jay, so I guess I'll see ya later."
"Yeah see ya Jen."
"Remember no hard feelings", Jensen said trying to smile.
Jared just nodded and walked home. He just wanted to close his eyes and forget today ever happened. He just wanted to sleep off all the guilt and regret, he just wanted one full night of sleep to do it though.
Interlude
His Momma wasn't blind nor stupid so she new exactly what her son was up to. Just like the time he snuck his first boyfriend into his bedroom, after that she secretly placed condoms and lube in his top draw. He was 17 after all and he would do it anyway, at least this way she new he was safe. That was until she saw his eyes light up when she introduced Jared to him.
***
Jensen rarely went a day without thinking about Jared. Thinking about how Jared had his own place at sixteen and didn't have his parents nagging him all the time.
Jared rarely went a day without thinking about Jensen. Thinking about how Jensen had life so well, a home, a family who loved him and probably had heaps of friends.
What they both didn't realize was that things weren’t always as they seem.
After about 2 weeks of small chatter at the end of their shifts and because Jared's house was on the way to Jensen's they would sometimes walk home together, mostly for the sake of company on Jared's part and because Jensen just wanted to get to know Jared more.
Jensen was told by his Momma to ask Jared if he'd like to come over for dinner. Despite never really hanging they had become close friends. So one afternoon while walking home Jensen finally did.
"Hey Jared, are you doing anything tonight cos my Ma want's to know if you wanna come round for dinner? It's ok if you can't cos it's late notice or if you don't want to cos we haven't known each other very long or whatever." Jensen realized he was babbling, but he didn't care, he was nervous and a little freaked out.
Jared smiled, Jensen was nervous and it was written all over his face. Jared didn't remember the last time had eaten a home cooked meal, let alone eaten at somebody else's house because trust Jared, a person can only eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for so long before your taste buds become numb to the taste.
"Um yeah sure sounds good. What time does your Ma want me there?"
Jensen smiled, relieved, "Six."
"Well I'll see you at six tonight then." Jared turned and walked towards his front door leaving quickly before he said something stupid and put his foot in it.
***
Jared couldn't remember the last time he had smelt roast chicken and vegetables. It reminded him of summer at home. Hot sunlight heating the air, making him sweat, skin sticking to clothes, clothes sticking to chairs. The smell reminded him of a family he didn't have. It stung a little but he had coped before and he could do it again. Jared just plastered a huge smile and a twinkle in his eye and headed towards the kitchen to greet everyone.
Ms Ackles was standing in front of the stove turning the roasted potatoes; Josh was playing a video game while Mac was quietly reading at the dinner table.
"Ms Ackles, thank you for inviting me over for dinner." Jared said smiling.
"The pleasures all mine and please call me Donna."
Jared licked his lips as he breathed in the aroma. "It smells delicious, Donna."
"Thank you Jared, there's still a few minutes till it will be ready so Jensen why don't you show Jared around?"
"Yeah ok Momma. Come on I'll give you the complementary tour," Jensen said, turning to face Jared.
"Yeah ok," Jared said, grinning.
Their home was a three bedroom house with a kitchen, bathroom, lounge room and a laundry. Nothing too extraordinary or different to the home he once had. It had a homey feel, a lived in feeling, full of love and comfort. He only wished that his flat felt like that.
Dinner was delicious. It was the best meal he had in nearly a year. The meal was full of talk about the goings on in life and meaningless questions.
At first Jared was a little surprised that no one asked him about his family or why he was living here on his own, they had to be suspicious. He never talked about them, dodged questions about anything to do with family and why his family was never around. If they weren't going to ask he most definitely wasn't going to tell and certainly not spend his time questioning it.
Besides no one would really want to be friends with someone whose own family disowned him. Life was easier living in a reality of fake smiles, ignorance and half hearted hugs. At least people pretended to like him.
In the end he just figured if they were going to respect his privacy about his family, he would do the same and not bring up the fact that he had never seen or heard Jensen talk about his dad ever.
Desert was still the best part of the meal. Donna made a mean home made apple pie with ice cream and if Donna was going to offer Jared three or more servings who was Jared to say no.
After dinner the boys headed straight to Jensen's bedroom for the big show down. Apparently Jared told Jensen straight faced that he was going to set the new high score on Tony Hawk Two Underground.
It took just over an hour before Jensen could reclaim the high score, even if it was only by eight points. He was still number one so in the end that's all that really mattered.
They talked to each other like they were best friends since they were born, like it was the most natural thing in the world. Jensen kind of figured Jared would be wondering about his absent father so he decided to beat him too it, decided to get it all out in the open.
"You can ask me you know," Jensen said.
Jared looked at him confused, "Ask you what?"
"About my dad." Jensen said sighing.
"It’s not any of my business; you want me to know you'll tell me, it works both ways."
"Ok, well, I want to tell you."
"Ok shoot then, I'm all ears."
"My dad left when I was a few months old," Jensen started. "He came back about three years later, but left again before the twins were born, Mac and Josh. He's a dead beat, no good father who didn't do anything unless he benefited from it. I've never seen him since and I'm happy for that. Life is hard but I would never wish for the shit my Momma went through for him, he's not worth it. It's always going to be Ma, Mac, Josh and Me."
That was kinda what Jared had figured well not that Jensen's dad sounded like an ass but that his parents weren't together. "I'm sorry Jensen, that's sucks big time."
Jensen half chuckled, "Yeah, well, that's life I guess."
"Well you shouldn't have to live with such a heavy burden."
"Yeah well that's life I guess," Jensen said with a grin.
"You wanna go another round of Tony Hawk?" Jared asked trying to distract Jensen from the question that was written all over his face.
"So I take it you don't wanna talk about your family or should I say lack of it?"
Jard was hoping Jensen wouldn't go there but he did, the charade was over now. No more hiding, no more secrets, just back to being alone and cold.
"No." Jared answered coldly.
"You sure?" Jensen pushed.
"Yes."
"Just so you know when you do want to tell me, I'll be ready to listen."
Jared looked up at Jensen hesitantly, "Okay."
Jared knew it was coming. That was the question he hated with so much passion, that was the question that stopped him from making real friends. Except this was the first time somebody actually respected his answer and had not pushed the issue. It was the first time somebody had cared enough to let it slide.
Sure he had Chad, but Jensen was different. Chad had two loving parents, a roof over his head, friends, money and a promised collage education. Jensen was kind of broken like Jared. Life had dealt them both a shitty hand. He didn't have the expectation of people who have life handed to them on a silver platter. It was nice to feel in the same league for once.
With all being said about the issue they got back to the pressing issue of the night, Tony Hawke. They played the play station and drank hot chocolate before Jared decided it was time to head home, by then it was just after midnight.
Jensen yawned, "You can crash on the couch tonight, if you want."
"Um I don't think that's such a good idea, I'll just go home."
"Is this another one of those 'I don't want to talk about it subjects'?" Jensen asked
"Yes."
"Ok well at least let me walk you home."
"I'm not a baby," Jared said sternly.
"Come on you've seen inside my house let me see inside yours."
The silence gave Jensen enough time to think. Technically he had never seen Jared enter the house he always stopped in front of it. He walked up the path but he had never seen him actually open the door and walk inside.
"Do you even have a house; you're not living on the streets, are you?” Jensen asked seriously. That would explain a lot. It would explain why Jared was all skin and bones, why his parents weren't around and why his only friend was that guy he worked with.
Jared on the other hand was a little unsure on how to take someone who cared so much, so he just stared.
"…."
Jensen couldn't believe it, the thought had never crossed his mind before. "OMG you are living on the streets? That's it you're on the couch, I don't care what you say."
"Dude calm down." Jared mentally kicked himself for not answering sooner. "I have a flat near here ok? So take it easy. I know what you're thinking ok but I was embarrassed and the house I was supposedly living in is actually Chad's. I'm going home to sleep at my place because this is another one of those 'I don't want to talk about it subjects' ok?” Jared said hoping Jensen wouldn't push the issue further.
Jensen breathed a sigh of relief but by the look on Jared's face Jensen’s thinking face must had been showing.
Jensen straightened up, "You have a lot of those subjects don't you?"
Jared chuckled "Yeah maybe one day I'll fill you in on the rest. Night Jen, see you later."
"Night Jay," Jensen said closing the door behind him.
If anybody was to ask them, that was the moment they became best friends. After that they spent every waking moment together. Sometimes they would hang out at Jensen's house having dinner or just hanging out; sometimes it would be kicking a ball around the park. They were practically living out of each others back pockets. Jensen didn't mind and obviously neither did Jared.
They talked about everything from dreams, ideas and hopes. Jensen was happy with how much Jared had opened up to him even if he still hadn't told him about his parents. Jared never told him he was gay but you'd have to be blind Freddy not to notice him NOT checking out girls and giving a sneaking glance at boys.
If Jensen was a girl then most people would think they were dating. But he wasn't and the proof of that was his hard on tented in his pants. Jensen was2 a guy and he didn't even know if he wanted to push Jared that way or if Jared was that way to begn with.
Jared was oblivious or pretending to be oblivious. He thought maybe Jensen was gay but he wasn't sure. Chad told him about how Jensen was sucking some guy off while he still had a girlfriend. He wasn't sure what to believe, why somebody would say cruel things like that if they weren't true but why would Jensen have a girlfriend and a boyfriend? It was all so confusing for Jared. Even though he was sixteen and a half he had lived a sheltered life on somethings compared to people his age. He was still very much a virgin in every sense of the word. Never kissed, held hands or even cuddled a guy or anybody for that matter romantically, nor was he inclined too. Jared knew all about surviving on nothing and watching his own back, he knew how it felt to be alone and not feel loved but he didn't know what it felt like to part of something bigger, something whole and meaningful. It was his own fault for not trying to change and by doing that he didn't fit in anymore.
So that was why Jared couldn't work out whether Jensen was gay, straight, bi or what ever he was into. But Jared soon got his answers. It was about three weeks after Jensen had first invited Jared over for dinner.
The night started out like normal, home cooked meal and then video games.
When Jared and Jensen were playing around in Jensen's bedroom, things took a more physical side. What started out as shoulder bumps and elbow jabs soon turned into a wrestling match, pillows included. Jensen had Jared pinned and Jensen held his arms above his head while using his body weight to hold Jared still underneath him.
That was the moment both the boys got the answers they were after. Jensen leaned down and cautiously placed his lips on Jared's. His tongue swiping at Jared's bottom lip before trying to lick his way into his mouth. It only lasted about five seconds before Jared started shaking and squirming trying to buck Jensen off.
That was the moment Jensen found out Jared didn't want to go there and that was the moment Jared found out Jensen really did suck that guy off.
Jensen immediately started apologizing. "I'm sorry Jay, I'm really sorry."
Jared didn't hear him though, caught up in his own mind and just running on auto. "I can't do this, we can't do this."
"Wha… what? Why?"
"I can do this, we can't do this." Jared repeated like broken record.
"Jay calm down. Come on breathe for me."
"I… I'm sorry Jensen but it can’t happen ok. I…I um I don't want to be like that. I… you…we can't. I just want to be your friend. Can we just be friends please?"
"Jay its ok, if that's what you really want, well just pretend it never happened ok?"'
Jared breathed a sigh of relief, "Friends yeah, I'm sorry Jen."
"Don't be. So um you still wanna play the play station?"
Jared started looking down and scuffing his feet. "Um… nah if it's cool I'm thinking I might head home. Got some stuff I need to do is all."
"That's fine Jay, so I guess I'll see ya later."
"Yeah see ya Jen."
"Remember no hard feelings", Jensen said trying to smile.
Jared just nodded and walked home. He just wanted to close his eyes and forget today ever happened. He just wanted to sleep off all the guilt and regret, he just wanted one full night of sleep to do it though.
Interlude