a lil before i go....
just a lil entry before i go...i am going to ind a dress today with a couple friends of mine ....had a rough day today,....dont quite know how to explain it...... just rough....i do so much for so many people in my life yet i never seem to get the same thing in return....i hate it so much it hurts.....MY life revolves around everyone elses issues.....when will the descending flight end? ......i dont know...but till then i will survive...i will survive thru the horror and torture that god consistentlu throws my way...i will survive thru the ins and outs of my daily accord...i will luv and lose the rest of my life...yet i will only love the one im with and nothing more..... i have lost best friends and close friends....most are meaningless to me....one in particular hurts like a knife in my back...best friends for 20 yrs....always talking...always there for eachother no matter what...turned in to me growing up and him refusing to....miss the laughter and fun...the talks and so on...but i guess its best this way...i guess its something that not even the utmost trust in someone can cure...adolescence is inevitable in his life....as a mother and wife i just can turn back the clock like that...i will soon be taking care of them on my own and i must survive....for them...for keith...for me...cannot perish in the enless sea...i refuse to....tata sweets....Bubblez