Heart maker( Let my heart be heard)
I couldn't sleep at night and i couldn't forget the look he made when he stared into the gleaming crystal heart necklace. "Why did she left him for?" i murmured to myself. I tossed and turned on my bed, and had to give up. I slowly open my door with little creak and saw the room Heven is in still lighted. "I bet he can't sleep either", i thought to myself and plumped on my bed back again. I don't know what to do and i am still on diet from eating the sweets. I sighed and grabbed my earpiece, listening to songs and jumped or dance as much as so that i can lose my weight. I stopped when i remembered about Avan, "hei at the first place, Avan is someone i loved is with his girlfriend" i whispered to myself and dropped to the wooden floor. I cried again when i think about the scene and how i still let him go off from my hand too easily.
i lay down on the floor and looked up the blank ceiling, i stared and my tears rolled down my flushed cheeks.
I felt suffocated and needed the fresh air , i covered myself with some warm clothes and walked out of Emiline. I preemptively stands a foot behind my gate and decisively playing my decision in my head. I looked by the gate and my blurry visions just keep making my tears flow endlessly.I turned my back to the gate and walked to the porch and sat by the stairs. I looked up to the skies and looked at how the beautiful moon can actually drown the existence of the stars where on its own look like the glitters of the sun that has been dispersed. I looked by the streets and see how darkly a street can be at night. I leaned over the stairs support and stared into the grasses of my yard. The greeness encouraged the growth of my jealousy and pain , the gentle wind that seems to embrace me in the afternoon turned into a sharp cold daggers to my skin. I tugged my clothes tigher for warmth and i heaved warm air into the cold atmosphere. I wanted something , a turning point and event to change but i felt that i am more of a sore loser that forget things in the day and remembers them at night.
I barged out from my whining gate and walked into nearby stores. All shops are closed until i saw this cat, her eyes are blue like Heven's and ignorance that is so compatible to Heven. I smiled while the cat stared at me beyond the window. I stared at the cat and saw shadows and backed away from it. The owner opened the door and smiled, " You want the cat?" he asked cheerfully. I stared at him , puzzled and stunned. The fur of the cat compliments its eyes just like how the tanned skin compliments Heven's eyes. I am so in love with the cat and thought i should try to touch her and her delicate figure. Like the mimosa , she hid her away but i just hold my hand leave it that way hanging until she came on her own and stroke her head on my hand. I carried her onto my body and she lay perfectly on my shoulders, her purrs and the vibrations from her makes me excited. I paid the owner for all her things and brought her to Emiline. She seems to like Emiline and the way she stroke herself at every corner of the house.
I smiled and admiringly staring at her, her moves and her stares, her mischief and her silence. I didn't realise Heven was standing behind me, so i decisively called out to her. "Heaven, Heaven come here" I gestured her gently over to me and she obediently comes to me. She still young and so with much mischief , she pounced on me. I laughed and kissed Heaven. I played with her until i fell asleep with Heaven on the couch, exhaustion and stress free for a moment. After a blissful closure, i woke up and so does Heaven. She nudged me on my body while she massaged me , i woke up tickled and flushed pink. I carried Heaven and brought her over to kitchen for her breakfast.She meowwed and stroked my legs and then rushed over to her breakfast hungrily gobbled down the food. I kneeled over at my new cute friend and looked at her animal's instinct when she ate the food.
I stood up and bumped into Heven, i looked up to him and he looked at me as if i am some kind of weirdo. I avoided his facial expressions and greeted him without looking over to him. "Good morning" i said cheerfully as i convinced myself to be normal. He just grunted and i got even more flustered. " He's no help" I murmured to myself and went on to get dressed for work. I put my manuscripts and other necessary materials into my briefcase and kneeled over to Heaven, " Dear Heaven, please take care of the house and protect the house from naughty things. Sweet Heaven that brought upon sweetness to my life may you bring love to other" i told you. I then whisked away when Heven hold onto me, " Where are you going? " he asked me softly and i was flushing red over his strong grip on me. " Er, i ..i am going to work. I have a deadline to meet" I stuttered clumsily. "Get a grip, felana" I thought to myself and he let go of me gently. He then like nothing happened ignored me and at the same time confused at his behaviour. As i walked to work, i wondered at his behaviour. "Was he worried for me or is he afraid i might leave him behind?" I shook my head vigorously and concentrated on my work. I focused so hard on my stories and realised that Avan was standing in front of me.
" So you are still here and here i thought you would resign" he said casually while looking at me
"Haha, What for? I just moved that's all" i said complacently , " why is he here? wrong timing seriously" i thought while i gave such an annoyed face when i saw the lady who is with him. "Is she working with Avan? Is the world really this small? Can it ever be smaller? " i stared at her and smiled , i was trying to escaped from the weird situations but ended up bmping into Heven. I can't figured out how God can be so cruel to me and i completely speechless,i don't know whether to smile or cry or even hide. I just really down on bad luck, i am trying no more to escape when my boss, Mr Harold called me.
" Felana, have your story completed?" he asked across the office. I looked at him and nodded. He then gently gestured,at which i rushed over my desk and grabbed my stories and manuscripts while i rushed over to Mr Harold. God finally cared for the poor me but i wonder why Heven is here. I never recalled he being here or having Avan's girlfriend near my premises. What do they want ? i sighed and entered Mr Harold . "Thank you, Mr Harold that was one awkward situation that i need to relieve myself from" I said gratefully.
" Is she working here , Harold because i never seen her before and i thought strangers are not allowed...." when i got cut off.
" She is my daughter, Sophia and he is not stranger, he is the carpenter in this company" He calmly answered. i made the "Oh i see" gesture and was preparing to continue.
" Avan used to be your boyfriend right? " ....................i went white . Even he knows , when in the other parts of the world is telling him and i am freaking out but i can never say anything but nodded obediently.
" I am so sorry if she and Avan have hurt you" he said softly. I looked over to Mr Harold and just smiled over to him. " You know Mr Harold, i am wishing them all the best" i smiled but in th depth of my heart , it has broken even more. I lied to myself and to everyone but it is the best for all of them.
I actively settled my story and i was about to walk off when i turned to Mr Harold and asked, "can i write another story ?" He looked surprised and nodded while smiling. "Up to you, what it is to be?" he casually answered and concentrated on his computer again. This way i won't be in the office and meeting all of them but i didn't realise they were waiting for me.
" So you are felana, the one who act as my boyfriend's sister?" she said snobbishly , i just looked up on her and answered " Well, since me and Avan is history, i don't wish to create a commotion over spilled milk" I walked over to my desk and grabbed my bag. Before, Avan hold me back, " You cared for me that much?" he asked with a worried look.
I shook my head and turned my back, Heven saw me has yet to speak to me but i turned over and called " Heven, come on . Work is over and i will be cooking dinner today. Heaven must be starving " I smiled over to him as he ran towards me. I left Avan and Sophia stranded in the meaningless conversation. "I am moving on, i just have to " i convinced myself. Heven just quietly follow me. He didn't say anything but i bet he wanted to beat Avan so hard. Or so i felt about it.
Will i ever know what he is ever thinking? I thought as i looked at him with much sadness from the dark depth of my heart. Is he the one who make a new heart for me? "Heart maker" i whispered
i lay down on the floor and looked up the blank ceiling, i stared and my tears rolled down my flushed cheeks.
I felt suffocated and needed the fresh air , i covered myself with some warm clothes and walked out of Emiline. I preemptively stands a foot behind my gate and decisively playing my decision in my head. I looked by the gate and my blurry visions just keep making my tears flow endlessly.I turned my back to the gate and walked to the porch and sat by the stairs. I looked up to the skies and looked at how the beautiful moon can actually drown the existence of the stars where on its own look like the glitters of the sun that has been dispersed. I looked by the streets and see how darkly a street can be at night. I leaned over the stairs support and stared into the grasses of my yard. The greeness encouraged the growth of my jealousy and pain , the gentle wind that seems to embrace me in the afternoon turned into a sharp cold daggers to my skin. I tugged my clothes tigher for warmth and i heaved warm air into the cold atmosphere. I wanted something , a turning point and event to change but i felt that i am more of a sore loser that forget things in the day and remembers them at night.
I barged out from my whining gate and walked into nearby stores. All shops are closed until i saw this cat, her eyes are blue like Heven's and ignorance that is so compatible to Heven. I smiled while the cat stared at me beyond the window. I stared at the cat and saw shadows and backed away from it. The owner opened the door and smiled, " You want the cat?" he asked cheerfully. I stared at him , puzzled and stunned. The fur of the cat compliments its eyes just like how the tanned skin compliments Heven's eyes. I am so in love with the cat and thought i should try to touch her and her delicate figure. Like the mimosa , she hid her away but i just hold my hand leave it that way hanging until she came on her own and stroke her head on my hand. I carried her onto my body and she lay perfectly on my shoulders, her purrs and the vibrations from her makes me excited. I paid the owner for all her things and brought her to Emiline. She seems to like Emiline and the way she stroke herself at every corner of the house.
I smiled and admiringly staring at her, her moves and her stares, her mischief and her silence. I didn't realise Heven was standing behind me, so i decisively called out to her. "Heaven, Heaven come here" I gestured her gently over to me and she obediently comes to me. She still young and so with much mischief , she pounced on me. I laughed and kissed Heaven. I played with her until i fell asleep with Heaven on the couch, exhaustion and stress free for a moment. After a blissful closure, i woke up and so does Heaven. She nudged me on my body while she massaged me , i woke up tickled and flushed pink. I carried Heaven and brought her over to kitchen for her breakfast.She meowwed and stroked my legs and then rushed over to her breakfast hungrily gobbled down the food. I kneeled over at my new cute friend and looked at her animal's instinct when she ate the food.
I stood up and bumped into Heven, i looked up to him and he looked at me as if i am some kind of weirdo. I avoided his facial expressions and greeted him without looking over to him. "Good morning" i said cheerfully as i convinced myself to be normal. He just grunted and i got even more flustered. " He's no help" I murmured to myself and went on to get dressed for work. I put my manuscripts and other necessary materials into my briefcase and kneeled over to Heaven, " Dear Heaven, please take care of the house and protect the house from naughty things. Sweet Heaven that brought upon sweetness to my life may you bring love to other" i told you. I then whisked away when Heven hold onto me, " Where are you going? " he asked me softly and i was flushing red over his strong grip on me. " Er, i ..i am going to work. I have a deadline to meet" I stuttered clumsily. "Get a grip, felana" I thought to myself and he let go of me gently. He then like nothing happened ignored me and at the same time confused at his behaviour. As i walked to work, i wondered at his behaviour. "Was he worried for me or is he afraid i might leave him behind?" I shook my head vigorously and concentrated on my work. I focused so hard on my stories and realised that Avan was standing in front of me.
" So you are still here and here i thought you would resign" he said casually while looking at me
"Haha, What for? I just moved that's all" i said complacently , " why is he here? wrong timing seriously" i thought while i gave such an annoyed face when i saw the lady who is with him. "Is she working with Avan? Is the world really this small? Can it ever be smaller? " i stared at her and smiled , i was trying to escaped from the weird situations but ended up bmping into Heven. I can't figured out how God can be so cruel to me and i completely speechless,i don't know whether to smile or cry or even hide. I just really down on bad luck, i am trying no more to escape when my boss, Mr Harold called me.
" Felana, have your story completed?" he asked across the office. I looked at him and nodded. He then gently gestured,at which i rushed over my desk and grabbed my stories and manuscripts while i rushed over to Mr Harold. God finally cared for the poor me but i wonder why Heven is here. I never recalled he being here or having Avan's girlfriend near my premises. What do they want ? i sighed and entered Mr Harold . "Thank you, Mr Harold that was one awkward situation that i need to relieve myself from" I said gratefully.
" Is she working here , Harold because i never seen her before and i thought strangers are not allowed...." when i got cut off.
" She is my daughter, Sophia and he is not stranger, he is the carpenter in this company" He calmly answered. i made the "Oh i see" gesture and was preparing to continue.
" Avan used to be your boyfriend right? " ....................i went white . Even he knows , when in the other parts of the world is telling him and i am freaking out but i can never say anything but nodded obediently.
" I am so sorry if she and Avan have hurt you" he said softly. I looked over to Mr Harold and just smiled over to him. " You know Mr Harold, i am wishing them all the best" i smiled but in th depth of my heart , it has broken even more. I lied to myself and to everyone but it is the best for all of them.
I actively settled my story and i was about to walk off when i turned to Mr Harold and asked, "can i write another story ?" He looked surprised and nodded while smiling. "Up to you, what it is to be?" he casually answered and concentrated on his computer again. This way i won't be in the office and meeting all of them but i didn't realise they were waiting for me.
" So you are felana, the one who act as my boyfriend's sister?" she said snobbishly , i just looked up on her and answered " Well, since me and Avan is history, i don't wish to create a commotion over spilled milk" I walked over to my desk and grabbed my bag. Before, Avan hold me back, " You cared for me that much?" he asked with a worried look.
I shook my head and turned my back, Heven saw me has yet to speak to me but i turned over and called " Heven, come on . Work is over and i will be cooking dinner today. Heaven must be starving " I smiled over to him as he ran towards me. I left Avan and Sophia stranded in the meaningless conversation. "I am moving on, i just have to " i convinced myself. Heven just quietly follow me. He didn't say anything but i bet he wanted to beat Avan so hard. Or so i felt about it.
Will i ever know what he is ever thinking? I thought as i looked at him with much sadness from the dark depth of my heart. Is he the one who make a new heart for me? "Heart maker" i whispered