I let the anger go...
Lately I've been finding it hard to be around myself. I've turned into a boring, cynical...well, bitch. And then Friday night when I was fighing with Adam for no reason, I had a revelation...why in the fuck am I so angry?? Then I got to thinking even more...about how if I keep going down this destructive path, I'm going to destroy my relationship not only with the single most important person in my life, but I'm going to end up hating myself too.
So how do I go about not being such a bitch? Well...I straightened myself up....I went back to my exercises I used to calm myself down when I have problems with my anxiety. I took a deep breath, looked at the situation ( but not overanylize it), "put it in my hot air balloon" and let it go...sounds so corny I know, but it really works. And then I thought about how my life really can't get any better right now...nothing's falling apart. I should be happy, so why wasn't I? I can't really explain my anger....but I let it all go. Now when I find myself getting overemotional about something so minute, I think about how my life is great. Seriously...I'm about to finish school (like 4 weeks left), I'm turning 21 in September, I'm going to find a job and get my life going, and I'm getting married in April.
I have a lot going for me. I have awesome people in my life.
SOOOOOO there's no reason to be angry.
(don't get me wrong, I'm still a cynic...people can't change overnight dammit!)
and now I'm going to sleep....because it's past midnight and I have class in the morning!!
So how do I go about not being such a bitch? Well...I straightened myself up....I went back to my exercises I used to calm myself down when I have problems with my anxiety. I took a deep breath, looked at the situation ( but not overanylize it), "put it in my hot air balloon" and let it go...sounds so corny I know, but it really works. And then I thought about how my life really can't get any better right now...nothing's falling apart. I should be happy, so why wasn't I? I can't really explain my anger....but I let it all go. Now when I find myself getting overemotional about something so minute, I think about how my life is great. Seriously...I'm about to finish school (like 4 weeks left), I'm turning 21 in September, I'm going to find a job and get my life going, and I'm getting married in April.
I have a lot going for me. I have awesome people in my life.
SOOOOOO there's no reason to be angry.
(don't get me wrong, I'm still a cynic...people can't change overnight dammit!)
and now I'm going to sleep....because it's past midnight and I have class in the morning!!