Time to Grow up or get the fuck out!
ok so as many of you know i am currently homeless...well thats an exaggeration.....I'm at my mom's house and i am moving in the with the wonderful Mar. Which should be interesting considering we have to share a bed and a room......not so much excited about sharing a room with a boy I am not intimate with. shit I am nto so excited about sharing a room with a boy I AM intimate with. And like ya so depression is definetly setting in. I even tried to have a hookup with a boy the other night and i COULDN"T even getoff and whats worse i COULDN"T GET MYSELF OFF!!! which is amazing cause i am the queen of self gratification. IT FUCKING SUKED SO BAD! He got off which was inportant i guess...NOT so much. I hate that. I hate it! men suck but I want one.I want to go to school...i want my bestfriend Shannon back in my life and for her to quit acting like a dumbass and leave her military jerk of a boyfriend alone!
I want sarah to grow up and face her family and say thats shes grown up, I want my dad to get a fucking grip and quit drinking and drugging. i want to have a job and lose ALL THE WEIGHT i put on which is ALOT. I want my face to clear up i want a hair cut i wan some new clothes i want some new friends...not that my new old ones aren't great...i just need straightness in my life.I want a boyfriend..not cause i have low selfesteem but because i miss phone calls adn i love yous and cuddling and just flat out affection. i am a great girlfriend and i know it...and with that i think i deserve someone whos up to my standards.And thats another thing...i ahve standards now...and i am NOT giving them up to anyone. I am not gonna sleep with people anymore on the first date cause frankly I NEVER get off anyways and its a waste of my time. well anywho i think my life is changing again dramatically...for the best. moving in with mar will be a push for me t grow up alttle and own up to my part of the bullshit. i am ridding my life of people that don't matter and of fake people and HALF ASS friends...you know who you are and i don't have to say anything other then shape up or ship out...there are a few exception cause i have a majority of the freetime...and then there are others who frankly have NO excuses and NO last chances your whipped out. So if anyone would like to leave me words of wisdom or like a bright message please do. I need all the postive energy I can get these days.
LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH
thanks for being there for me
especially ricky and mitch and nick and nick cause you are like godsends to me
I want sarah to grow up and face her family and say thats shes grown up, I want my dad to get a fucking grip and quit drinking and drugging. i want to have a job and lose ALL THE WEIGHT i put on which is ALOT. I want my face to clear up i want a hair cut i wan some new clothes i want some new friends...not that my new old ones aren't great...i just need straightness in my life.I want a boyfriend..not cause i have low selfesteem but because i miss phone calls adn i love yous and cuddling and just flat out affection. i am a great girlfriend and i know it...and with that i think i deserve someone whos up to my standards.And thats another thing...i ahve standards now...and i am NOT giving them up to anyone. I am not gonna sleep with people anymore on the first date cause frankly I NEVER get off anyways and its a waste of my time. well anywho i think my life is changing again dramatically...for the best. moving in with mar will be a push for me t grow up alttle and own up to my part of the bullshit. i am ridding my life of people that don't matter and of fake people and HALF ASS friends...you know who you are and i don't have to say anything other then shape up or ship out...there are a few exception cause i have a majority of the freetime...and then there are others who frankly have NO excuses and NO last chances your whipped out. So if anyone would like to leave me words of wisdom or like a bright message please do. I need all the postive energy I can get these days.
LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH
thanks for being there for me
especially ricky and mitch and nick and nick cause you are like godsends to me