The Coach Rides Again!
Since I don't really have much to talk about right now, I decided to continue with the theme of my last post and talk more about Big Ten football. Tonight, I'm going to turn my attention to the school that I hate: Michigan.
After the 2007 season, Coach L(LLLLLLLL)loyd Carr turned the reigns of the Michigan football program over to West Virginia coach "Dick" Rodriguez ("DickRod"). DickRod brings with him the spread offense - something that Michigan is not familiar with. It will be interesting to see how a departure from the Bo Schembechler days will be handled in Ann Arbor, but as of right now there seem to be more pressing issues for the new coaching staff to deal with. 1.) Michigan doesn't have a quarterback. After Chad Henne graduated, most thought that the top dog position for the team's offense would be turned over to Ryan Mallett. Well, after DickRod fired Lloyd's QB coach, Mallett decided to transfer, as did most of the back up quarterbacks. Lately the buzz has been that Michigan is putting all their eggs in the Terrelle Pryor basket - however, if he decides to sign with another school, things may get a little warm in Schembechler Hall. 2.) Along with Mallett, most of Michigan's big-show receivers (as well as players on other key positions) have left - either transferred or gone to the draft. This shouldn't cause too much trouble, as Michigan should have no problem recruiting some big-time playmakers, but fielding an offense that is not battle hardened should make things a little interesting. Finally, 3.) DickRod. This guy just seems to be bad news - I hate Michigan and don't like to see them win, but they could seriously do better than this guy. At least I could respect Lloyd, even if I don't like his employer. Now, lets get started.
First game: vs. Utah - Utah is one of the big guns of the Mountain West Conference, finishing the 2007 season 9-4. Their key win of the 2007 season was a win against #11 UCLA...but then again, Notre Dame beat UCLA, too...maybe this isn't a huge accomplishment. However, don't expect Utah to come into this game just looking to have a learning experience - they'll be coming in trying to win. Utah's offense also runs a spread, so the defense will know how to defend against it. This game is going to swing on whether or not Michigan can come in with a good momentum and a quarterback. I'm going to assume they can come in with at least someone in the QB spot, so I'm going to go out on a limb and say that this will be a Michigan win, but a damn close one. This will send a signal to anyone sitting in the Big House: get ready, it's going to be a rocky ride (Record: 1-0, with a strong chance for an upset).
Second game: vs. Miami of Ohio: Thankfully for Michigan, this should be a chance for them to pad their stats a bit. Miami of Ohio finished the 2007 season 6-7, despite a trip to the MAC Championship game (which they lost to CMU). They managed to give Minnesota their only victory of the season, but surprisingly beat Bowling Green, which was a very tough team last year (don't get cocky Minnesota fans, they took your asses to overtime). After this game is over, you can expect to hear Michigan fans and ESPN commentators alike boasting about this being the year for a national title game after a stunning victory over Miami of Ohio. Deep down, they will just be trying to forget: 1.) the near miss with Utah the week before, 2.) the knowledge that Notre Dame is going to be welcoming them to South Bend the following week ("CHARLIE WEIS HUNGRY!!!!!"), 3.) the bucket of KFC they made love to after the near miss against Utah. (Record: 2-0 "ZOMG A RETURN TO GLORY!!!!!!!")
Third game: at Notre Dame - Notre Dame sucked last year...lets just get that out there right now. However, with Charlie out of the chocolate factory (but not willingly) and into the hot seat, look for the Irish to come out fightin' and looking to prove themselves early. Yes, Notre Dame will have only had one game against San Diego State before welcoming DickRod and his Wolverines, but you can bet that Charlie wants to make an example out of Michigan and send a message to their next opponent, Michigan State. Notre Dame will be ready for this game, whereas Michigan will be too busy getting their national championship gear ready to pay much attention. This is going to give Michigan fans a wake up call, as Notre Dame will have both the luck o' the Irish AND Jesus on their side for this one. Notre Dame win, but with a chance for a Michigan upset...c'mon, they may both be undefeated going into this one, but it'll always be a "pillow fight" in my eyes. (Record: 2-1)
Fourth game: Wisconsin - here begins the decline of the 2008 Michigan football program. Yes, Wisconsin had some near-misses and heartbreaking upsets last season, but they - like Ohio State - are consistently good. Michigan will still be looking for its identity while Wisconsin will be looking for lunch. Michigan may have the reputation, but Wisconsin has the talent and experience. Michigan will put up a fight, but the victors they will not be. This won't be a moral victory, this will be rape. Wisconsin will take this one and silence a cocky Big House crowd trying to forget last week's loss in South Bend. All will not be well in Mudville...err, Ann Arbor. (Record: 2-2 "It's gettin' hot in herr!")
Fifth game: vs. Illinois - Illinois managed to upset Ohio State and get to the Rose Bowl last year....HOW?! They went from a Big Ten bottom-feeder to the Rose Bowl in a year. Rick Moranis has been contacted, and a sequel to "Little Giants" is in the works. Illinois will have played Missouri and Penn State coming into this one - two good teams. Things are looking up for Illinois, and I expect them to have momentum at several points in this game. Maybe it's wishful thinking, maybe it's really inspiration, but I think Illinois is going to take this one. If they can take down the mighty Buckeye giant, they can certainly take down a struggling Michigan football team. (Record: 2-3, but with a good chance of a Michigan upset)
Sixth game: vs. Toledo - By this time, Michigan is going to be sweating. They are coming into the 6th week of the season with a losing record, which isn't something they are used to in Ann Arbor. Michigan fans that praised him at the beginning of the season will be calling for his head by the 6th week and DickRod will be feeling 100,000 eyes that don't like him as he paces the sideline. The 2007 Toledo football team was nothing special...so much so that I had a hard time finding out anything about them. I don't expect that this year will be any better. Michigan is going to come in desperate to remember what winning feels like and will try to make an example of Toledo. It's not going to be a blow-out, but Michigan will have their second string on the field by the end of the game. Look for the Michigan defense to come smashing through the Toledo O-line and have its way with the Toledo backfield. I'm praying for an Appalachian State-style upset, but I really don't think Toledo is the team to get that done. Michigan will win big and with that win the news will be flooded with exclamations of a ship being righted and national title dreams renewed. (Record: 3-3)
Seventh game: at Penn State - I think that this could very well be JoePa's last game on the Penn State sideline. His players and his fans love him, and would probably like nothing more than to send him off with a perfect season. It's been done before. Beaver Stadium is a tough place to play, and the Penn State defense has usually been pretty solid. Michigan may have been able to sneak past them before, but with a new offensive scheme and less talent than the year before, don't expect any miracles this year. If Lloyd were still on the sidelines, I'd predict a Michigan victory, but Lloyd knew how to win in the Big Ten. Penn State takes this one. (Record: 3-4, with Michigan fans complaining about a crowned field and stadium noise)
Eighth game: vs. Michigan State - I haven't seen Michigan State take down these bastards since 2001. I've sat through year after year of Michigan victories and scUM trash talking. I can't wear my band jacket to Wal-Mart in my home town without some camo-wearing Michigan fan putting my school down. If this is how a band member feels, imagine how our team must feel after years of being told they are Michigan's "little brother." After the loss in 2007, MSU fans, players, and coaches got pissed. Expect that energy and aggression to carry over onto the field. I expect this to be one of the toughest hard-hitting games of the season. Both teams hate eachother and dread the idea of losing to the other. If there was ever a year to turn this series around and take Michigan down, this is it. "Little Brother" will take down his big sister in a hard-fought game. Michigan will keep us on the edge of our seats, but will fall short in the end. After the game is over, I will boldly stand in a parking lot near the Big House, in sweaty clothing (nasty t-shirt, bike shorts, lucky boxers, knee-highs, marching shoes, etc.) waving a piece of cold KFC and boldly declaring divine punishment on the Michigan community...it will be a day I've waited for a long time. (Record: 3-5, and I will burn my room mate's couch to celebrate)
Ninth game: at Purdue - In the eyes of Michigan fans, all will not be right with the world. They just lost to a team they have dominated for the better part of a decade and once again are faced with a losing record. Now they get to hit the road and face off against another team that has a grudge against them, Purdue. Recently, DickRod made news for stealing a star Purdue recruit just hours before signing day. Joe Tiller called DickRod a "man wearing a wizard's hat and selling snake oil." This is going to be a game of emotion for Purdue, and one that they are going to want to win badly. The Purdue offense will play conservatively to decrease the chances of turning the ball over to the Michigan defense - the key will be to slow the pace of the Michigan game and then take it to the air to establish a good lead. The threat here will be the Michigan defense, which could potentially pick Purdue apart on a good day. This is going to be a heated game - since it is on the road and I think Purdue has a score to settle, I predict a Purdue victory, though I admit on this one that I could be wrong. (Record: 3-6..."it's the end of the world as we know it....and I feel fine)
Tenth game: at Minnesota - Michigan is now a beast backed against a wall. They don't just want to win, they NEED it. From here on out, they need to win the rest of their games to achieve a 6-6 record for bowl elegibility to play in a bowl game. Thankfully, Minnesota is a team that they shouldn't have any problems with. Yes, their team will be in shambles, but they are still Michigan and they should be able to still beat teams like Minnesota who, lets face it, just aren't good. Minnesota finished last season with only 1 win, and nothing can convince me that they are going to make a run for the Big Ten title in a year (though stranger things can happen). Could Minnesota win? Sure. But then again, I could also meet a guy in a Big Bird costume brandishing a shovel on my way to the bathroom - my point is, it's just not likely. Michigan will take this one, and they will probably take it "real big." (Record: 4-6...too little, too late.)
Eleventh game: vs. Northwestern - Northwestern can certainly pull off big surprises, and this might possibly be one of them. Northwestern has the talent and the ability to make this a very interesting game, and I fully expect that they will. However, this is senior day in Ann Arbor. There will be an energy on the field that not even DickRod can ruin. Michigan will sense that all is not lost and will pull it together for one last hoo-rah in the Big House. The Northwestern defense will keep the Michigan offense busy, and will probably be the reason for the score being as close as it probably will be. However, the Northwestern offense just won't be able to hold back an energized Michigan defense. The game will be hard-fought, and the score will be close, but Michigan will come out on top. Even now, you'll hear Michigan fans screaming about "Big Blue" being number one, and then the cashier at Wal-Mart will tell them how much they owe for their case of Bud Lite and their carton of smokes. (Record: 5-6)
Final game: at Ohio State - Let's not fool ourselves here. The chances that a struggling Michigan team will be able to come into Columbus and upset Ohio State are slim (though, of course, there is always a chance). These two teams hate eachother, but Tressel will show that just as he owned Lloyd's soul, he owns DickRod's too. Michigan will struggle to keep it close, but OSU will be too much for them. (Record: 5-7)
This was a tough one to call, and I admit that there is a good chance I could be way off on this one. I fully expect Michigan to struggle next year, and I expect that the highest bowl they can hope for would be the Insight Bowl or the Motor City bowl (PLEASE GOD, SEND THEM TO THIS ONE!). However, there is a chance that they could be much better than we think and that they could turn some heads. Only time will tell...
After the 2007 season, Coach L(LLLLLLLL)loyd Carr turned the reigns of the Michigan football program over to West Virginia coach "Dick" Rodriguez ("DickRod"). DickRod brings with him the spread offense - something that Michigan is not familiar with. It will be interesting to see how a departure from the Bo Schembechler days will be handled in Ann Arbor, but as of right now there seem to be more pressing issues for the new coaching staff to deal with. 1.) Michigan doesn't have a quarterback. After Chad Henne graduated, most thought that the top dog position for the team's offense would be turned over to Ryan Mallett. Well, after DickRod fired Lloyd's QB coach, Mallett decided to transfer, as did most of the back up quarterbacks. Lately the buzz has been that Michigan is putting all their eggs in the Terrelle Pryor basket - however, if he decides to sign with another school, things may get a little warm in Schembechler Hall. 2.) Along with Mallett, most of Michigan's big-show receivers (as well as players on other key positions) have left - either transferred or gone to the draft. This shouldn't cause too much trouble, as Michigan should have no problem recruiting some big-time playmakers, but fielding an offense that is not battle hardened should make things a little interesting. Finally, 3.) DickRod. This guy just seems to be bad news - I hate Michigan and don't like to see them win, but they could seriously do better than this guy. At least I could respect Lloyd, even if I don't like his employer. Now, lets get started.
First game: vs. Utah - Utah is one of the big guns of the Mountain West Conference, finishing the 2007 season 9-4. Their key win of the 2007 season was a win against #11 UCLA...but then again, Notre Dame beat UCLA, too...maybe this isn't a huge accomplishment. However, don't expect Utah to come into this game just looking to have a learning experience - they'll be coming in trying to win. Utah's offense also runs a spread, so the defense will know how to defend against it. This game is going to swing on whether or not Michigan can come in with a good momentum and a quarterback. I'm going to assume they can come in with at least someone in the QB spot, so I'm going to go out on a limb and say that this will be a Michigan win, but a damn close one. This will send a signal to anyone sitting in the Big House: get ready, it's going to be a rocky ride (Record: 1-0, with a strong chance for an upset).
Second game: vs. Miami of Ohio: Thankfully for Michigan, this should be a chance for them to pad their stats a bit. Miami of Ohio finished the 2007 season 6-7, despite a trip to the MAC Championship game (which they lost to CMU). They managed to give Minnesota their only victory of the season, but surprisingly beat Bowling Green, which was a very tough team last year (don't get cocky Minnesota fans, they took your asses to overtime). After this game is over, you can expect to hear Michigan fans and ESPN commentators alike boasting about this being the year for a national title game after a stunning victory over Miami of Ohio. Deep down, they will just be trying to forget: 1.) the near miss with Utah the week before, 2.) the knowledge that Notre Dame is going to be welcoming them to South Bend the following week ("CHARLIE WEIS HUNGRY!!!!!"), 3.) the bucket of KFC they made love to after the near miss against Utah. (Record: 2-0 "ZOMG A RETURN TO GLORY!!!!!!!")
Third game: at Notre Dame - Notre Dame sucked last year...lets just get that out there right now. However, with Charlie out of the chocolate factory (but not willingly) and into the hot seat, look for the Irish to come out fightin' and looking to prove themselves early. Yes, Notre Dame will have only had one game against San Diego State before welcoming DickRod and his Wolverines, but you can bet that Charlie wants to make an example out of Michigan and send a message to their next opponent, Michigan State. Notre Dame will be ready for this game, whereas Michigan will be too busy getting their national championship gear ready to pay much attention. This is going to give Michigan fans a wake up call, as Notre Dame will have both the luck o' the Irish AND Jesus on their side for this one. Notre Dame win, but with a chance for a Michigan upset...c'mon, they may both be undefeated going into this one, but it'll always be a "pillow fight" in my eyes. (Record: 2-1)
Fourth game: Wisconsin - here begins the decline of the 2008 Michigan football program. Yes, Wisconsin had some near-misses and heartbreaking upsets last season, but they - like Ohio State - are consistently good. Michigan will still be looking for its identity while Wisconsin will be looking for lunch. Michigan may have the reputation, but Wisconsin has the talent and experience. Michigan will put up a fight, but the victors they will not be. This won't be a moral victory, this will be rape. Wisconsin will take this one and silence a cocky Big House crowd trying to forget last week's loss in South Bend. All will not be well in Mudville...err, Ann Arbor. (Record: 2-2 "It's gettin' hot in herr!")
Fifth game: vs. Illinois - Illinois managed to upset Ohio State and get to the Rose Bowl last year....HOW?! They went from a Big Ten bottom-feeder to the Rose Bowl in a year. Rick Moranis has been contacted, and a sequel to "Little Giants" is in the works. Illinois will have played Missouri and Penn State coming into this one - two good teams. Things are looking up for Illinois, and I expect them to have momentum at several points in this game. Maybe it's wishful thinking, maybe it's really inspiration, but I think Illinois is going to take this one. If they can take down the mighty Buckeye giant, they can certainly take down a struggling Michigan football team. (Record: 2-3, but with a good chance of a Michigan upset)
Sixth game: vs. Toledo - By this time, Michigan is going to be sweating. They are coming into the 6th week of the season with a losing record, which isn't something they are used to in Ann Arbor. Michigan fans that praised him at the beginning of the season will be calling for his head by the 6th week and DickRod will be feeling 100,000 eyes that don't like him as he paces the sideline. The 2007 Toledo football team was nothing special...so much so that I had a hard time finding out anything about them. I don't expect that this year will be any better. Michigan is going to come in desperate to remember what winning feels like and will try to make an example of Toledo. It's not going to be a blow-out, but Michigan will have their second string on the field by the end of the game. Look for the Michigan defense to come smashing through the Toledo O-line and have its way with the Toledo backfield. I'm praying for an Appalachian State-style upset, but I really don't think Toledo is the team to get that done. Michigan will win big and with that win the news will be flooded with exclamations of a ship being righted and national title dreams renewed. (Record: 3-3)
Seventh game: at Penn State - I think that this could very well be JoePa's last game on the Penn State sideline. His players and his fans love him, and would probably like nothing more than to send him off with a perfect season. It's been done before. Beaver Stadium is a tough place to play, and the Penn State defense has usually been pretty solid. Michigan may have been able to sneak past them before, but with a new offensive scheme and less talent than the year before, don't expect any miracles this year. If Lloyd were still on the sidelines, I'd predict a Michigan victory, but Lloyd knew how to win in the Big Ten. Penn State takes this one. (Record: 3-4, with Michigan fans complaining about a crowned field and stadium noise)
Eighth game: vs. Michigan State - I haven't seen Michigan State take down these bastards since 2001. I've sat through year after year of Michigan victories and scUM trash talking. I can't wear my band jacket to Wal-Mart in my home town without some camo-wearing Michigan fan putting my school down. If this is how a band member feels, imagine how our team must feel after years of being told they are Michigan's "little brother." After the loss in 2007, MSU fans, players, and coaches got pissed. Expect that energy and aggression to carry over onto the field. I expect this to be one of the toughest hard-hitting games of the season. Both teams hate eachother and dread the idea of losing to the other. If there was ever a year to turn this series around and take Michigan down, this is it. "Little Brother" will take down his big sister in a hard-fought game. Michigan will keep us on the edge of our seats, but will fall short in the end. After the game is over, I will boldly stand in a parking lot near the Big House, in sweaty clothing (nasty t-shirt, bike shorts, lucky boxers, knee-highs, marching shoes, etc.) waving a piece of cold KFC and boldly declaring divine punishment on the Michigan community...it will be a day I've waited for a long time. (Record: 3-5, and I will burn my room mate's couch to celebrate)
Ninth game: at Purdue - In the eyes of Michigan fans, all will not be right with the world. They just lost to a team they have dominated for the better part of a decade and once again are faced with a losing record. Now they get to hit the road and face off against another team that has a grudge against them, Purdue. Recently, DickRod made news for stealing a star Purdue recruit just hours before signing day. Joe Tiller called DickRod a "man wearing a wizard's hat and selling snake oil." This is going to be a game of emotion for Purdue, and one that they are going to want to win badly. The Purdue offense will play conservatively to decrease the chances of turning the ball over to the Michigan defense - the key will be to slow the pace of the Michigan game and then take it to the air to establish a good lead. The threat here will be the Michigan defense, which could potentially pick Purdue apart on a good day. This is going to be a heated game - since it is on the road and I think Purdue has a score to settle, I predict a Purdue victory, though I admit on this one that I could be wrong. (Record: 3-6..."it's the end of the world as we know it....and I feel fine)
Tenth game: at Minnesota - Michigan is now a beast backed against a wall. They don't just want to win, they NEED it. From here on out, they need to win the rest of their games to achieve a 6-6 record for bowl elegibility to play in a bowl game. Thankfully, Minnesota is a team that they shouldn't have any problems with. Yes, their team will be in shambles, but they are still Michigan and they should be able to still beat teams like Minnesota who, lets face it, just aren't good. Minnesota finished last season with only 1 win, and nothing can convince me that they are going to make a run for the Big Ten title in a year (though stranger things can happen). Could Minnesota win? Sure. But then again, I could also meet a guy in a Big Bird costume brandishing a shovel on my way to the bathroom - my point is, it's just not likely. Michigan will take this one, and they will probably take it "real big." (Record: 4-6...too little, too late.)
Eleventh game: vs. Northwestern - Northwestern can certainly pull off big surprises, and this might possibly be one of them. Northwestern has the talent and the ability to make this a very interesting game, and I fully expect that they will. However, this is senior day in Ann Arbor. There will be an energy on the field that not even DickRod can ruin. Michigan will sense that all is not lost and will pull it together for one last hoo-rah in the Big House. The Northwestern defense will keep the Michigan offense busy, and will probably be the reason for the score being as close as it probably will be. However, the Northwestern offense just won't be able to hold back an energized Michigan defense. The game will be hard-fought, and the score will be close, but Michigan will come out on top. Even now, you'll hear Michigan fans screaming about "Big Blue" being number one, and then the cashier at Wal-Mart will tell them how much they owe for their case of Bud Lite and their carton of smokes. (Record: 5-6)
Final game: at Ohio State - Let's not fool ourselves here. The chances that a struggling Michigan team will be able to come into Columbus and upset Ohio State are slim (though, of course, there is always a chance). These two teams hate eachother, but Tressel will show that just as he owned Lloyd's soul, he owns DickRod's too. Michigan will struggle to keep it close, but OSU will be too much for them. (Record: 5-7)
This was a tough one to call, and I admit that there is a good chance I could be way off on this one. I fully expect Michigan to struggle next year, and I expect that the highest bowl they can hope for would be the Insight Bowl or the Motor City bowl (PLEASE GOD, SEND THEM TO THIS ONE!). However, there is a chance that they could be much better than we think and that they could turn some heads. Only time will tell...