(no subject)
I know its very early in the year to be making this kind of decision and I also know that it is possible that I could change my mind in the future, but I've made a decision. I am almost positive I am moving to Charleston and going to college and the College of Charleston. I've thought it over the last couple of days (procrastination of writing papers allows more time for thought) and I decided I really want to do this. There are so many reasons why not to (I'll miss my mom, I'll miss KP, I'll miss my Nana, It's far away, What if my dog dies) but there are so many better reasons to go(I'll be able to reach my potential, I can became this better person, growing up doesn't mean growing apart, I will be home every so often). Maybe they aren't overruling in numbers but they definately are in quality.
I talked to KP today about my decision. We both got sad and went into our probably weekly talks about phone calls and being best friends and things like that. She told me everything will work out, we just need faith. I know it's the truth, but I don't know if I could handle missing her. I brought up the concept of the future, the after college life, and she said that we could live next door to each other. It was never concluded where since she wants the cold and I want the heat, but we both knew we couldn't live without the other. I know four years is nothing, but through everything we have the most amazing bond. I told her today I would only be coming home four times a year. She kinda freaked out a little bit (which I understand), but I told her I would come home every summer and we'd just lock ourselves up in my room for a week and just talk about EVERYTHING. I was even reminded that I had to call her a minute after I had sex. Just because I'd need that minute to think of how to break it to her.
I'm really excited and nervous about this. More then anything in my entire life. Because from this moment on, the decisions I make will inevitably effect my future. There is no turning back, only looking forward and putting my life in the the hands of those who decide to be involved in it.
I think I'm just looking for some support from people that it's gonna be ok. And that this decision is ok.
In other random last minute news, I went to a wake tonight and saw some cousins I haven't seen in a while: one who's mom compared her to Elvira, my oriental cousin, these brothers who were checking me out, my cousin Amanda, and my other cousin who has cancer. It was an ok time.
I talked to KP today about my decision. We both got sad and went into our probably weekly talks about phone calls and being best friends and things like that. She told me everything will work out, we just need faith. I know it's the truth, but I don't know if I could handle missing her. I brought up the concept of the future, the after college life, and she said that we could live next door to each other. It was never concluded where since she wants the cold and I want the heat, but we both knew we couldn't live without the other. I know four years is nothing, but through everything we have the most amazing bond. I told her today I would only be coming home four times a year. She kinda freaked out a little bit (which I understand), but I told her I would come home every summer and we'd just lock ourselves up in my room for a week and just talk about EVERYTHING. I was even reminded that I had to call her a minute after I had sex. Just because I'd need that minute to think of how to break it to her.
I'm really excited and nervous about this. More then anything in my entire life. Because from this moment on, the decisions I make will inevitably effect my future. There is no turning back, only looking forward and putting my life in the the hands of those who decide to be involved in it.
I think I'm just looking for some support from people that it's gonna be ok. And that this decision is ok.
In other random last minute news, I went to a wake tonight and saw some cousins I haven't seen in a while: one who's mom compared her to Elvira, my oriental cousin, these brothers who were checking me out, my cousin Amanda, and my other cousin who has cancer. It was an ok time.