farmers don't need resumes
Yesterday I applied to intern at a local farm. Why...?
L is having a very difficult time dealing with being back in his hometown, his mom's death, his broken hand, the home renovations, planning or scheduling anything, maintaining a relationship, starting a business... essentially: everything. Depression has hit him hard. And while I am very sympathetic to his plight and want to do my very best to help him pull through, I've got to take care of myself too. That, and I'm a little pissed. I came here for a job. I moved here to start a farm and a life with this guy. What the fuck am I supposed to do with myself when the guy with the farm says that he doesn't want to be a farmer? Or that I'm great and sweet and wonderful but he feels like he's treating me poorly and isn't there for me?
So I'm going to farm, damn it, even if it's somewhere else. I'm even willing to live on this other farm for the six-month internship. I don't want to abandon L, but living here and being his sole confidant is starting to crush the joy out of me. He's never been to therapy and is afraid/reluctant/refusing to go. I don't have the qualifications to handle this, and I'm a bit concerned I'm enabling him. If he thinks he can get though this with time, so be it I guess. But that doesn't mean my life has to stop.
L is having a very difficult time dealing with being back in his hometown, his mom's death, his broken hand, the home renovations, planning or scheduling anything, maintaining a relationship, starting a business... essentially: everything. Depression has hit him hard. And while I am very sympathetic to his plight and want to do my very best to help him pull through, I've got to take care of myself too. That, and I'm a little pissed. I came here for a job. I moved here to start a farm and a life with this guy. What the fuck am I supposed to do with myself when the guy with the farm says that he doesn't want to be a farmer? Or that I'm great and sweet and wonderful but he feels like he's treating me poorly and isn't there for me?
So I'm going to farm, damn it, even if it's somewhere else. I'm even willing to live on this other farm for the six-month internship. I don't want to abandon L, but living here and being his sole confidant is starting to crush the joy out of me. He's never been to therapy and is afraid/reluctant/refusing to go. I don't have the qualifications to handle this, and I'm a bit concerned I'm enabling him. If he thinks he can get though this with time, so be it I guess. But that doesn't mean my life has to stop.