Miserable...
As probably evident from the title, i'm not feeling too great today, so please feel free to move on and skip this one. I don't usually write when i'm down, as i'd hate for people to think i was fishing for sympathy, but i want to write today, as it may help get it out of my system.
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I'm just fed up because at the moment everything seems to be a big effort, and nothing seems to get done without encountering a disproportionate amount of hassle first.
The computer order is the first thing, as although the revised order is going through okay (as far as i can tell) the finance people from the previous order are still bugging me by email. I can't get in touch with them ever and no one seems prepared to say or put in writing that that order is cancelled. Also, i want a receipt for the second order, but that seems to be asking the earth. Plus i've not had anything in the post yet, and its been 3 days.
Also, they have tried to call me 3 times, but i have been away from the phone every time, though i know this is not their fault, i can never get in touch with them when i call back - so i'm frustrated as i have no idea who hs called me or about what.
I just want someone to be able to tell me that the first order is gone and the second one is fine.
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Then the second thing, and this is key to why my mood has just plummetted, is that when i got home today from my first day's training at Sainsbury's, i opened my uniform pack, to find that the trousers do not fit and that they had given me the polo shirts instead of the girls blouse. The whole effect just made me feel really frumpy.
The trousers are a size 14, and though all my other clothes are this size, these are like, needing 4 inches extra on the waist. Although i know this means they are probably cut quite small, its knocked me for six.
I know i have put on some weight, and i have recently been trying to exercise more, and i'm ashamed at the state i've got my body into, but this is such an emotional setback. I just want to cry, because i look so awful, then i feel bad for being that occupied with how i look. But i can't help it. Girls out there, you know how much we attach to the little number written inside our clothes, and it makes it hard to be rational about it. But the uniform is likely to make me a size 18, which although anomalous to everything else i wear, is not going to help me feel able to lose weight.
Oh, i really can't put this into words properly. I can't explain how i feel. It seems so shallow in writing.
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The other things are just the normal things like fretting about exam results, and Alan living so far away. They just seem worse than usual, because of everything else getting on top of me.
Sorry for not noting anyone today, i've read you all, but its been such an effort just to write this.
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I'm just fed up because at the moment everything seems to be a big effort, and nothing seems to get done without encountering a disproportionate amount of hassle first.
The computer order is the first thing, as although the revised order is going through okay (as far as i can tell) the finance people from the previous order are still bugging me by email. I can't get in touch with them ever and no one seems prepared to say or put in writing that that order is cancelled. Also, i want a receipt for the second order, but that seems to be asking the earth. Plus i've not had anything in the post yet, and its been 3 days.
Also, they have tried to call me 3 times, but i have been away from the phone every time, though i know this is not their fault, i can never get in touch with them when i call back - so i'm frustrated as i have no idea who hs called me or about what.
I just want someone to be able to tell me that the first order is gone and the second one is fine.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Then the second thing, and this is key to why my mood has just plummetted, is that when i got home today from my first day's training at Sainsbury's, i opened my uniform pack, to find that the trousers do not fit and that they had given me the polo shirts instead of the girls blouse. The whole effect just made me feel really frumpy.
The trousers are a size 14, and though all my other clothes are this size, these are like, needing 4 inches extra on the waist. Although i know this means they are probably cut quite small, its knocked me for six.
I know i have put on some weight, and i have recently been trying to exercise more, and i'm ashamed at the state i've got my body into, but this is such an emotional setback. I just want to cry, because i look so awful, then i feel bad for being that occupied with how i look. But i can't help it. Girls out there, you know how much we attach to the little number written inside our clothes, and it makes it hard to be rational about it. But the uniform is likely to make me a size 18, which although anomalous to everything else i wear, is not going to help me feel able to lose weight.
Oh, i really can't put this into words properly. I can't explain how i feel. It seems so shallow in writing.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The other things are just the normal things like fretting about exam results, and Alan living so far away. They just seem worse than usual, because of everything else getting on top of me.
Sorry for not noting anyone today, i've read you all, but its been such an effort just to write this.