Continuing
life is lame right now. i miss my boy. i miss marc. people are getting in touch with me like madness right now. and i feel like i've got too much to deal with. but, honestly, i don't think i'm dealing with much. just feeling ashamed. my arms are gross. Veronica knows what i'm talking about. i don't think it's okay to work and not wear long sleeves. i might buy a tee with long sleeves tomorrow. under a tank top. under a sweater. i dunno.
i couldn't stop scratching tonight. i just wanted to shower and wash my clothes. cal. fresh was closed and it's like it just made things worse. what is wrong with me? i took my pills today. anyway, i only got to spend about 20 mins with shawn tonight. i couldn't stop crying on the way home. i miss him. god, i love him. and he makes me so happy. when i don't think about how little i see him. he's good to me. heh, he's my favorite boyfriend.
i really wish people would make up their minds when it comes to me. either you keep talking to me, keep being my friend -and i'm not demanding [not even asking!!] that you be as good to me as i am to you- or just leave me the fuck alone.uuugggghhhhh. sometimes i don't like being that way. but other times, i'm R E A L L Y that way. i do miss my friends. i do. it was fun ... while it lasted. but i'm just not one of those people that .other people can really cling on to and love to be around for very long. i think the only reason that veronica is still my friend is b/c our friendship would die every other year. but then we'd pick up. never any hard feelings. never any big arguements or drama.
speaking of washing clothes ... it's time to dry them.
gina .... i love you!
i couldn't stop scratching tonight. i just wanted to shower and wash my clothes. cal. fresh was closed and it's like it just made things worse. what is wrong with me? i took my pills today. anyway, i only got to spend about 20 mins with shawn tonight. i couldn't stop crying on the way home. i miss him. god, i love him. and he makes me so happy. when i don't think about how little i see him. he's good to me. heh, he's my favorite boyfriend.
i really wish people would make up their minds when it comes to me. either you keep talking to me, keep being my friend -and i'm not demanding [not even asking!!] that you be as good to me as i am to you- or just leave me the fuck alone.uuugggghhhhh. sometimes i don't like being that way. but other times, i'm R E A L L Y that way. i do miss my friends. i do. it was fun ... while it lasted. but i'm just not one of those people that .other people can really cling on to and love to be around for very long. i think the only reason that veronica is still my friend is b/c our friendship would die every other year. but then we'd pick up. never any hard feelings. never any big arguements or drama.
speaking of washing clothes ... it's time to dry them.
gina .... i love you!