Bones Fanfic: The Sun Will Rise (2/6)
Title: The Sun Will Rise
Author: biba79
Disclaimer: Characters aren’t mine, they belong to Hart Hanson.
Pairings/Characters: Booth/Brennan
Rating: M
Summary: The jolting waves of pleasure, the utter acknowledgement of what they had denied themselves hit them like the sun was suddenly peaking through the clouds after hundreds of cold gray days. Season Six! Booth/Brennan.
Word Count: 3,192
Spoiler: This fic was written before ‘The Blackout in the Blizzard’ even aired. So, they didn’t have that heart to heart conversation at his apartment with the dates, and Vincent isn’t dead either. Just wanted to clarify that. But it is during the sniper arc.
Author's Note: Thanks to Jen (jsq) and Hannah (brainysmurt6) for the lovely help with this fic. Thank you Hannah for helping me with the title, that was the first time I ever had a problem with finding the perfect title. Song ‘The Sun Will Rise by Brendan James’
This is a birthday fic to my lovely and awesome friend Ren (sunsetdreamer). She requested a fluffly fic, and she knows how hard that is for me, and I did my best with it, so I hope she likes it. So, it might be a bit angsty at first, but it will be too fluffy by the end. I hope you have a wonderful birthday Ren, with lots of love, hugs and presents. Remember, the mob loves you!
A/N: Thanks for the alerts, reviews and favorites. Hope you guys are
enjoying it.
Song “Feel It Now” by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club.
And all my sorrows awaken
And all my fear’s run down
I turn myself into an angel
I run myself into the ground
Chapter 2
Booth didn’t give a damn what Brennan was saying or doing. The only thing he wanted now was an answer. His arm reached out like a greedy claw plucking her away from the party guests.
“Hey,” she protested as he purposefully steered her into a somewhat secluded corner near her office. “Hey,” she said again, totally befuddled by his sudden urgent demand of her time.
Booth found himself at a loss for words now that he had her, using his best inconsiderate partner technique. He felt the deathly fear of expressing his emotions; it paralyzed him again.
Brennan glared at him perplexed at first and then caught completely off guard by what she saw in his eyes; it literally took her breath away. She backed up a little from him, further into the corner. Why did he look so angry, yet so hurt? What caused the
betrayal she saw in his eyes?
She couldn’t imagine what could have changed his mood. She was delighted that they solved their case in record time. Now he looked like he had lost his last best friend. What could have happened? Why did trouble seem to follow Booth wherever he went; when would he ever get a break?
“What’s wrong?” She asked suddenly forgetting the annoyance she felt at his unmannerly interruption of her conversation. Any irritation was replaced by the familiar care and concern she reserved just for him - anytime, anywhere.
“We need to talk!” He stated emphatically. Damn her, how could she leave him? Why would she do that? How in the hell would they ever work on their problems if she ran away? No, he wouldn't just let her run, not without confronting her. She was one to judge
him. He could never be the one to take her away from this, he could never be that guy. The hell he couldn’t. He wasn’t giving her up without finding out why. He was enough, he could take her away from it all, he could better than anyone. He had to.
“Booth, we are in the middle of a party, don’t tell me you expect me to work on Christ...?” Brennan stopped as she saw it in his eyes. This was about them, it was not a business thing. That was not what she saw, this was totally and completely personal, and the idea that he was going there again sent a familiar fear up her spine. The goose bumps popping up all over her skin were a red alert. But maybe she had read more into it; maybe this was just his way of letting her down gently. Oh, when was this torture going to end? When was she going to be able to stop giving a damn about Booth? Why couldn’t she just forget Booth, she talked a good game, and that was all it would ever be. She had played dodge Booth so long she didn't know how to stop. It was time to stop. Whatever this was about, she needed to stop it once and for all.
She couldn’t do this now, it was Christmas, the most sentimental time and the most lonely time. The Booth she knew didn’t put himself out there to be hurt again and again.
She couldn’t do this, not tonight, not now. She wasn’t feeling strong enough; she felt the true loneliness bred by the holiday. She had nowhere to go. Max was spending time with Russ and his family this year. She had no familiar surroundings to bask in but her apartment. Even Angela was deserting her to go to her dad’s with Hodgins. If she couldn’t be with her own family then it was better to be alone; besides a weekend with Angela and her dad would be more than she could take. They were fun but they were almost too much fun. And it would be Angela’s mission to make sure Brennan had a bevy of gorgeous men to reject when they went Night clubbing. She had skillfully resisted their attempts the last time, but this time she felt too out of sorts to stand her ground, besides knowing Angela, she knew that if she refused to go to all the parties she had no doubt the parties would come to her.
Brennan didn’t feel that strong. Not this Christmas. So much was up in the air in her life. About the only thing she could count on now was her professional life. And she wasn’t too sure about that either at the moment. They had closed their latest case, which
was tough; she was thrilled on one hand and confused on the other. Maybe she should leave just as she told Angela she was thinking of doing. She should leave now while the getting away was good. After the conversations she and Booth had earlier, she wasn’t sure what to do. It would be awkward for a while, no doubt, but the job tended to encompass so much of their lives that maybe it would be fine to stay. She loved the job in so many ways. But in truth she also loved Booth in many ways too and that might never go away if she stayed... and she needed it to go away if nothing was ever going to happen. She sensed he wasn’t going to make it any easier now than he ever had. His pursuit of her had her totally bewildered. She hadn’t expected anything to happen between them since he had gotten with Hannah, she was sure he was into her but then the break up happened. The first time he told her he wanted to give them a chance, her heart sang but her antenna rose too, how could she trust risk losing him forever? Maybe Booth was just reacting to his own loneliness and was desperate to satisfy that. She didn’t know what to think or to feel. And she would never settle for being a temporary solution to his isolation, at least not anymore, there was too much at stake. She could never be only that to him anymore.
He seemed as confused as she was. The labyrinth of words they exchanged did nothing to alleviate the perplexing hidden signals and mixed metaphors.
“Booth, whatever you want to talk about, can it wait till after the holidays?” Brennan asked hopefully.
“No, it can’t.” He looked around feeling like everyone in the Jeffersonian could hear them, and for sure, at least half of the party gatherers were staring at them. He didn’t want this moment to happen on a stage for all the ears to hear and eyes to see. He wanted her alone. His arm propelled her towards her office gently. She walked in clutching her glass of punch then just as quickly setting it down deciding she was too old for a security blanket.
“So we’re still the most efficient partners the FBI has ever seen, huh?” She asked, trying to stave off the nervous apprehension that was stimulating her legs to shake and her heart to beat like crazy.
“Yeah, they are quite proud. So, we are still partners, right? Unless you are thinking of leaving...” Booth couldn't handle pretending anymore. This was it. Damn it, enough time had been wasted, whatever she said, today was it. If she was leaving, then fine. If not,
then she damn well better tell him where he stood. And he damn well better be standing when she got through!
“What?” Brennan couldn’t believe it. Sure there were times they seem to almost have a physic link with each other, but this? “Why, who said that?”
Booth wondered if Brennan was shocked because he knew, or because she wasn’t thinking of going anywhere? He also wondered why they never seemed to get anything straight with each other. Nothing about the way they communicate had ever become clear. Okay that was for sure in part his fault, so now he wouldn’t keep her in suspense.
“Angela said something.” He didn’t find it easy to tell her what Angela said since most of it was insults about him.
Brennan shook her head and rolled her eyes. Leave it to Angela to rat her out. “I’m not going anywhere. I should be honest about...” Her hands trembled now, and her legs felt like cooked noodles. What does this mean? Why was he... she could see why by the
vulnerability in his eyes. Why now after all this time, after all the times she had convinced herself to stop loving him because he had loved someone else. Why did he choose this night? She had given up all hope.
Booth felt like he could afford to breathe again, the knot that had formed in his throat since Angela had taken his moment of false security away was unraveling slightly.
He nodded a little saying nothing.
Did Angela have a death wish? Well, she must of because Brennan was going to kill her when she found her. “I... I don’t mean to be cold.”
Booth could see how nervous she was, and a part of him just wanted to take her in his arms and tell her everything - tell her he couldn’t live like this anymore, tell her he wanted her, that he needed her, and he had to have her.
"It's not that I didn't consider it. I was sorely tempted but... in the end I knew it was not right.” Her hands gestured apologetically.
“I’m going with my heart on this...”
Her last words wilted his expectations and sent his heart scurrying for cover. She was doing it again. He was pissed, and he was hurt, and he was mostly just so damn tired. He wanted so much more than this mess they had created. Why didn’t they ever seem to want it at the same time? She told him she loved him that stormy night when he saved her, he knew she did. He knew that some part of her always had held back from him because of her fear of losing him forever. Declarations were almost like recriminations to her. If she loved him then she was going to be losing him eventually, that was what she thought anyway. She couldn’t be more wrong. He felt that more than anything the dysfunctional stuff made him so angry, because he knew it was also his fault. She went with her head with him before, and now she could go with her heart? It was about time she took a risk on him.
“Oh yeah, Bones. You and your heart have been so out of control.” The way he said it sent guilt pangs riveting through her again. She was doing it again, maybe it was the way it was meant to be all along, maybe she would never be the one to make him happy no matter how much she wanted; all she seemed to ever do was hurt him.
Booth said it more sarcastically than he meant to, or did he even think before saying it? No, all he could do was feel, all he had ever been able to do around her was feel and knowing that she wouldn’t even let her heart into the fray hurt. She wouldn't give him her heart before. All she would do was let her head rule everything. His heart ached for her, for the possibility of her.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Brennan asked a little defensively, knowing he was attacking her in some way. Her voice rose a little, while trying to maintain a calm almost jovial front.
Booth gave up. He had put himself out there enough. She was rejecting him all over again. Fine, she didn't think he was worth the trouble then maybe he wasn’t. It hurt like hell, but maybe she was right, maybe this was why it never really happened the way it
could have. Maybe he was not what she needed. And God knew she deserved everything. If he couldn’t be that, then he has no business making declarations or screwing up her life. So for once he wouldn’t be selfish, he would finally and completely let this go. They got a reprieve today; they were still here and able to work at the job they both loved.
Maybe that would be all it will ever be, and that had to be enough. So his heart gave in, and his head took over too.
“Nothing. It means you are right. I’m going with my head too,” he said sadly, forcing a wan smile.
“Good.” Brennan saw the pain in his eyes. She saw the look of surrender on his face. And her heart melted. How could she do this? She was denying herself what she wanted the most. And it was the defeat on his face that killed her inside. This man was the man she wanted to see get everything his heart desired, Booth deserved to be happy. How many times had her heart broken with his? How many times had she watched him struggle and writhe in pain? How much more would he take before he gave up and stopped fighting, or before he lost his spirit and his will? Was she really causing the look in his eyes? All this was going through her head as she made the decision that caused her heart to ache interminably.
How could she let herself hurt him? But she knew she was right, this was for the best. It would only end badly and the mere thought of it ever ending once it began nearly killed her. She continued to fool herself that it would ever end. She wouldn’t be honest
about it because to face that would mean that now this very moment she was putting an end to it.
Putting away her dreams, her heart’s deepest wishes with this one last act, she was disposing of her life. Denying herself her only chance for absolute happiness was harder than she thought. She didn’t really give any thought to this as she reacted on impulse.
She took the few steps to close the distance between them.
Booth saw her advancing towards him, his heart stopped for those brief moments. Maybe she was changing her mind. He stood perfectly still, waiting.
She reached him, looking up into his eyes. She would always love those eyes. He was going with her decision and even though it was painful, maybe in a way it guaranteed a lifetime friendship that would never be subjected to ruin and rubble the way deeper relationships went. She felt relieved that things were so nice and tidy between them.
“Merry Christmas, Booth.” She rose on her toes to give him the kiss - a gesture of the friendship they had both surrendered to.
His response was somewhat cut off as her face neared his. His eyes glimmered like diamonds as he felt her body brush against his. The pent up emotions were bursting to the surface, every feeling he ever had for her exploded inside of him like a bunch of tiny sparklers going off in every cell. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t say what he was feeling, but before a word could get out edgewise her lips made contact with his. The mere brush of her lips intended to be a light gesture of friendship, but she fooled herself into thinking any touch or any contact could ever be anything but what it had always been. The kiss wasn’t enough, one kiss
was never enough. Didn’t they know that yet? Yes they knew it. They could read it in each other’s eyes as their lips impatient with the delays and false starts and stops decided enough was enough.
The jolting waves of pleasure, the utter acknowledgement of what they had denied themselves hit them like the sun was suddenly peaking through the clouds after hundreds of cold gray days. They saw and felt the heat permeating through their beings. The
blinding light of revelation enfolded them together in a warm protective dome when at last the walls they held around them separated them, safeguarding them suddenly. They saw, they felt and they heard each other without the words.
Vibrations of undeniable love created an aura of beauty around them. Nothing had ever felt like this. The freedom to love and be loved was there. It had always been there waiting. Waiting patiently until they were matured and honed and ready.
They were ready, so very prepared for this. Yet so surprised and bewitched all at the same time. He opened his mouth to tell her. He felt it so strongly he had to say it.
But Brennan’s eyes told him she knew. They both knew. They had always known what they had forever been denying. Her hand caressed his cheek as they both magnetically reach out for each other, all the pretenses were gone. Their lips were welded together. Their arms were entwined around each other. Their embrace was so close, so overdue that nothing could pry them apart. Not a jury coming back to give the verdict, not an ounce of doubt or a shred of denial. This was it. They both felt it so strongly and there was no way in hell they would let this pass them by again. They had made it back to each other, and no one and nothing would tear them apart.
Everything was in that one kiss.
Every emotion, every fear, every hope, every desire they felt was in that kiss. Lips told what mouths had refused so stubbornly to admit for months. Bodies confirmed what each cell inside them had always known - they were meant to be. They were to be now and forever. This was a lifetime. This was life. At last they were living. The couple that was no longer in waiting was oblivious to anything material around them because they were the only two people anywhere. They were living the dream. They were grasping the brass ring. They were totally alive for the first time in their lives, they had found love, real love tested by fire. And the symmetry of them together in love was perfect for once, their timing was on. Their pretense was gone and they were living their dream. They were each other’s dream.
They didn’t see the peeping Daisy, they didn’t hear the envious remarks she made, nor did they see the angel in disguise, granted a really well disguised Angela taking Daisy away so they could be alone. They didn’t see the shimmering happiness Angela felt that
she had done a good deed.
Booth and Brennan finally parted, long enough to speak for once. It was Booth who said it all with just one word. “Whoa.” His smiling eyes took her breath away.
“Horse.” She agreed whole-heartedly.
Tbc...