SPART
All too rarely is creativity found in the most common corners of life. Most would agree that, of all places to find anything remotely engaging, SPAM is the last place you'd think of.
And so it is, that today, shortly after 2am, from some quiet lonely server in the depths of the internet, ixh@kitaabun.co.uk sent me the first piece of SPAM I have ever been glad to receive. Thus:
Do not let him guess that I am here or thatyou know me.
The beast saw that the gate hungslightly ajar upon its hinges.
He must remain herewith you, for really my long absences are more dangerous toyou than to me.
And,outside, Tarzan of the Apes drained his cup to the lastdrop. Ah, you are Tarzan of the Apes, exclaimed Kraski. Yet from time immemorial aguard had always remained upon the summit of the outer wall. And now Flora Hawkes saw all her well-laid plans upon theverge of destruction. Whatever punishment the Big Bwana inflicts I will accept asa man should. Get him to drink coffee and thenyou will know what to do with this.
He does not drink wine or anything withalcohol in it, but I know that he likes coffee. You know that only in fairfight, as one bull fights another, have I ever killed aMangani. The ape-man eyed Kraski as he had eyed the others. He could not distinguish the words, but thetones of one seemed quite distinctly feminine. And so it befell that Tarzan of the Apes set out once moreupon the long trail that leads to Opar.
I am Tarzan of the Apes, replied the ape-man. Thesewere in the nature of footprints that filled him with quiteas much surprise as had the arrow. You are mad, Flora, replied the man, it cannot be he. And so it befell that Tarzan of the Apes set out once moreupon the long trail that leads to Opar.
The ape-man eyed the speaker in silence for a moment.
Get him to drink coffee and thenyou will know what to do with this.
I have oftenserved it to him in his room late at night upon his returnfrom the theater or a ball. Oh, vait, vait, Miss Flora, cried Bluber, risinghurriedly. He must remain herewith you, for really my long absences are more dangerous toyou than to me.
Not since the greatTarmangani came among us last have there been strangerswithin Opar.
God, Carl, she whispered, in trembling tones, look!
Often the tworoamed the plain and the jungle hunting together. If you dothat again, damn me if I dont break your neck. If he did suspect what horrible punishment would bemeted to them all for their temerity?
I am Tarzan of the Apes, replied the ape-man.
The last timeWerper dogged my footsteps, and between him and theearthquake I was nearly done for.
We know you, growled one of the old bulls; yesterday wesaw you when you killed Gobu.
Youre not angels, either, Bluber, any of you, retorted thegirl.
And now Flora Hawkes saw all her well-laid plans upon theverge of destruction.
Now I am sure that you can tell uswhere we are and direct us upon our proper course.
Correct - Edgar Rice Burrough's Tarzan of the Apes (with some words joined together, no idea wy) - ultimately leading to the same advert for Viagra have received for months. How nice of "Trudy Fulton" to send me this, to throw a handful of literature in with the usual Fare.
I think we should all write to Trudy Fulton at ixh@kitaabun.co.uk and personally thank her for her efforts.
And so it is, that today, shortly after 2am, from some quiet lonely server in the depths of the internet, ixh@kitaabun.co.uk sent me the first piece of SPAM I have ever been glad to receive. Thus:
Do not let him guess that I am here or thatyou know me.
The beast saw that the gate hungslightly ajar upon its hinges.
He must remain herewith you, for really my long absences are more dangerous toyou than to me.
And,outside, Tarzan of the Apes drained his cup to the lastdrop. Ah, you are Tarzan of the Apes, exclaimed Kraski. Yet from time immemorial aguard had always remained upon the summit of the outer wall. And now Flora Hawkes saw all her well-laid plans upon theverge of destruction. Whatever punishment the Big Bwana inflicts I will accept asa man should. Get him to drink coffee and thenyou will know what to do with this.
He does not drink wine or anything withalcohol in it, but I know that he likes coffee. You know that only in fairfight, as one bull fights another, have I ever killed aMangani. The ape-man eyed Kraski as he had eyed the others. He could not distinguish the words, but thetones of one seemed quite distinctly feminine. And so it befell that Tarzan of the Apes set out once moreupon the long trail that leads to Opar.
I am Tarzan of the Apes, replied the ape-man. Thesewere in the nature of footprints that filled him with quiteas much surprise as had the arrow. You are mad, Flora, replied the man, it cannot be he. And so it befell that Tarzan of the Apes set out once moreupon the long trail that leads to Opar.
The ape-man eyed the speaker in silence for a moment.
Get him to drink coffee and thenyou will know what to do with this.
I have oftenserved it to him in his room late at night upon his returnfrom the theater or a ball. Oh, vait, vait, Miss Flora, cried Bluber, risinghurriedly. He must remain herewith you, for really my long absences are more dangerous toyou than to me.
Not since the greatTarmangani came among us last have there been strangerswithin Opar.
God, Carl, she whispered, in trembling tones, look!
Often the tworoamed the plain and the jungle hunting together. If you dothat again, damn me if I dont break your neck. If he did suspect what horrible punishment would bemeted to them all for their temerity?
I am Tarzan of the Apes, replied the ape-man.
The last timeWerper dogged my footsteps, and between him and theearthquake I was nearly done for.
We know you, growled one of the old bulls; yesterday wesaw you when you killed Gobu.
Youre not angels, either, Bluber, any of you, retorted thegirl.
And now Flora Hawkes saw all her well-laid plans upon theverge of destruction.
Now I am sure that you can tell uswhere we are and direct us upon our proper course.
Correct - Edgar Rice Burrough's Tarzan of the Apes (with some words joined together, no idea wy) - ultimately leading to the same advert for Viagra have received for months. How nice of "Trudy Fulton" to send me this, to throw a handful of literature in with the usual Fare.
I think we should all write to Trudy Fulton at ixh@kitaabun.co.uk and personally thank her for her efforts.