Fic: Someone Who Loves Me 2/3 (T)
Title: Someone Who Loves Me (part 2 of 3)
Rating: T
Universe: movieverse
Genre: angst
Summary: Sam feels empty and anguishes over his life and his apparent lack of purpose. As he realizes the extent of Bee's inexhaustible love, and his own feelings toward the bot, can he find happiness and fulfillment after all? angst, holo!bee, yaoi
A/N: this was supposed to be a oneshot; I'm travelling so I don't have a lot of time to edit during the day so the story was cut into three. I tried to put a lot into this middle section; I donno if it all works, just hope it doesn't bore. the payoff's really in the last chapter.
"Someone Who Loves Me" by Abraxas (2009-09-05)
Sam was sitting at the wheel when he got the call. He beamed from ear to ear recognizing that ringtone - it was Mikaela. They had not spoken since the events of Egypt. The Fallen and all of that...it seemed like the vagaries of another lifetime ago lost and forgotten.
The boy answered while Bumblebee silenced the radio.
Sam did not get as much as a word beyond 'hello'. The only sounds within the cabin were the echoes of Mikaela's voice coming out of the telephone. Bumblebee tried not to eavesdrop - humans, and their notions of privacy, were not always easy to understand - it became impossible, though, as he sensed his friend's stress.
The last trace of smile evaporated. One final attempt to speak was thwarted. The call was dead. The telephone slipped through his grip.
Sam was silent, just sitting and gazing into space.
Bumblebee was silent, too, while gathering what to do. The girl did not want to be with the boy anymore. He did not know what to say. And there was so much he wanted to do. He tightened the seatbelt around the boy - who clung onto it as if it were a tether to life.
The engine revved.
Bumblebee drove with Sam still dazed. The familiar urban landscape, with its maze of lights, faded away. The road itself narrowed then pavement slipped into gravel under the tread of the wheels.
When Sam snapped out of it he realized Bumblebee stopped in the middle of a forest by a river.
He stepped out of the Camaro and sulked toward the water. He sat at the edge with his feet within its current. Above, the sky was dotted with stars. Below, the water shimmered with their lights. It was like a painting of what the night ought to be. The time and space had been chosen perfectly.
Sam heard the crackling of stone - it was Bumblebee, exposed, walking toward the river.
The boy leaned against the autobot.
* * *
Nothing was said between them but Sam remembered thinking everything would be OK as long as Bumblebee was by his side.
Maybe, because Bumblebee was alien, Sam was unafraid to be naked with his feelings. Maybe it was like that, too, going the other way - with the autobot shedding its defenses in front of the boy. They were of two different worlds therefore between each other escaped the judgements that could have been with others of their kind.
Truth was that Sam loved Bumblebee since the start of their relationship when they were simply driver and car. The transformer, in any shape or form, was beautiful and the boy was not ashamed to express it. It was true - and he could not help but smile at the image of his friend - yellow and black and sleek, sexy lines.
A car could be a very sexy thing, he always knew that, and there was no difficulty extending that awe onto the autobot.
Yes - god, yes - there was something sexy about Bumblebee - was it wrong to think of it that way?
Sam hoped not.
Beyond though there was a slew of physical touches here and there that seemed spurred by the subconscious. He did not think much of the contact until the emptiness emerged and forced a thorough re-evaluation of life. Little, covert touches like the way his fingers drifted along the stripes on the Camaro's hood. Or the edges of the door. Or the rim of the wheel.
And the attention to detail given during their regular backyard washing! The time they spent together, it was bonding, a way to pass the time with a friend. Of course, caged within the body of a Camaro, his friend got dirty a lot. Now, now with eyes wide, the whole affair took on the shade of another character.
Mikaela. His other male friends. He was close with those people and they got dirty but he did not bathe them. He did not crawl throughout their bodies. He did not reach into secret and hidden areas.
The autobot was not like any friend or like anyone yet the way he washed his friend was it not akin to an act of love?
Other affectionate flourishes could not be excused as habits learned through years of driving. Because he did it and he knew he did it - it was on purpose. Tracing the autobot's insignia. Stroking the vehicle's leather. Holding onto its shift-stick too long to be casual.
Sam was hit by a reality he did not consider - to Bumblebee, who would have felt all of it, was it indeed interpreted as love? Was it satisfying a need particular to autobots? Particular to Bumblebee?
With all of the surprises that changed his life that year the biggest shock were not the possibilities that his friend could be interested, romantically, with him, that he too could be infatuated with him, it was that he was not afraid of what it meant and where it would have lead.
Bumblebee was the most beautiful and awesome thing of all time, ever, but Sam's worship of the transformer was deeper than that. As a guardian he was selfless and willing to protect at the cost of his life. As a friend he was forgiving, understanding, patient and in infinite quantity. Sam question his ability to be as flawless but just the thought of Bumblebee crawling with legs broken, and the anguish it invoked, it brought to surface a strength he did not fathom he possessed.
* * *
They returned to the river - it was their place where they could be free to be just a man and a machine.
"Oh," Sam said, suddenly reminded of the package he got through the mail that afternoon. "Yeah, speaking of anime, I got you something, Bee."
"Something?" Bumblebee revved the engine. "A present kind of something?"
The boy chuckled as the Camarao shook about.
"Since you keep watching it I thought you'd like it."
He rummaged through a sack and removed the envelope. It was visibly, almost comically overstuffed. He sliced it and revealed its content.
"It's Sesshoumaru, from Inuyasha, a nice, little plushie."
"Sweet! You got me Fluffy-Sama," Bumblebee said while Sam raised an eyebrow - Fluffy-Sama? he mouthed. "Put it on!"
Sam attached the end of the plushie onto the ever growing and expanding cluster of objects that dangled off of Bumblebee's rear view mirror. A honey-scented 'Beeotch' freshener. A dreamcatcher. A pair of jade dolphins. And a chibi Sesshoumaru with sword.
"Awesome! And, I got you something, too," the autobot announced.
"Buying off the internet again?" the boy teased.
"I plead the fifth! Well, I downloaded it, actually." The windshield flashed like a monitor. The speakers echoed the voice of Witney Houston. "It's called 'The Bodyguard'."
TBC
Rating: T
Universe: movieverse
Genre: angst
Summary: Sam feels empty and anguishes over his life and his apparent lack of purpose. As he realizes the extent of Bee's inexhaustible love, and his own feelings toward the bot, can he find happiness and fulfillment after all? angst, holo!bee, yaoi
A/N: this was supposed to be a oneshot; I'm travelling so I don't have a lot of time to edit during the day so the story was cut into three. I tried to put a lot into this middle section; I donno if it all works, just hope it doesn't bore. the payoff's really in the last chapter.
"Someone Who Loves Me" by Abraxas (2009-09-05)
Sam was sitting at the wheel when he got the call. He beamed from ear to ear recognizing that ringtone - it was Mikaela. They had not spoken since the events of Egypt. The Fallen and all of that...it seemed like the vagaries of another lifetime ago lost and forgotten.
The boy answered while Bumblebee silenced the radio.
Sam did not get as much as a word beyond 'hello'. The only sounds within the cabin were the echoes of Mikaela's voice coming out of the telephone. Bumblebee tried not to eavesdrop - humans, and their notions of privacy, were not always easy to understand - it became impossible, though, as he sensed his friend's stress.
The last trace of smile evaporated. One final attempt to speak was thwarted. The call was dead. The telephone slipped through his grip.
Sam was silent, just sitting and gazing into space.
Bumblebee was silent, too, while gathering what to do. The girl did not want to be with the boy anymore. He did not know what to say. And there was so much he wanted to do. He tightened the seatbelt around the boy - who clung onto it as if it were a tether to life.
The engine revved.
Bumblebee drove with Sam still dazed. The familiar urban landscape, with its maze of lights, faded away. The road itself narrowed then pavement slipped into gravel under the tread of the wheels.
When Sam snapped out of it he realized Bumblebee stopped in the middle of a forest by a river.
He stepped out of the Camaro and sulked toward the water. He sat at the edge with his feet within its current. Above, the sky was dotted with stars. Below, the water shimmered with their lights. It was like a painting of what the night ought to be. The time and space had been chosen perfectly.
Sam heard the crackling of stone - it was Bumblebee, exposed, walking toward the river.
The boy leaned against the autobot.
* * *
Nothing was said between them but Sam remembered thinking everything would be OK as long as Bumblebee was by his side.
Maybe, because Bumblebee was alien, Sam was unafraid to be naked with his feelings. Maybe it was like that, too, going the other way - with the autobot shedding its defenses in front of the boy. They were of two different worlds therefore between each other escaped the judgements that could have been with others of their kind.
Truth was that Sam loved Bumblebee since the start of their relationship when they were simply driver and car. The transformer, in any shape or form, was beautiful and the boy was not ashamed to express it. It was true - and he could not help but smile at the image of his friend - yellow and black and sleek, sexy lines.
A car could be a very sexy thing, he always knew that, and there was no difficulty extending that awe onto the autobot.
Yes - god, yes - there was something sexy about Bumblebee - was it wrong to think of it that way?
Sam hoped not.
Beyond though there was a slew of physical touches here and there that seemed spurred by the subconscious. He did not think much of the contact until the emptiness emerged and forced a thorough re-evaluation of life. Little, covert touches like the way his fingers drifted along the stripes on the Camaro's hood. Or the edges of the door. Or the rim of the wheel.
And the attention to detail given during their regular backyard washing! The time they spent together, it was bonding, a way to pass the time with a friend. Of course, caged within the body of a Camaro, his friend got dirty a lot. Now, now with eyes wide, the whole affair took on the shade of another character.
Mikaela. His other male friends. He was close with those people and they got dirty but he did not bathe them. He did not crawl throughout their bodies. He did not reach into secret and hidden areas.
The autobot was not like any friend or like anyone yet the way he washed his friend was it not akin to an act of love?
Other affectionate flourishes could not be excused as habits learned through years of driving. Because he did it and he knew he did it - it was on purpose. Tracing the autobot's insignia. Stroking the vehicle's leather. Holding onto its shift-stick too long to be casual.
Sam was hit by a reality he did not consider - to Bumblebee, who would have felt all of it, was it indeed interpreted as love? Was it satisfying a need particular to autobots? Particular to Bumblebee?
With all of the surprises that changed his life that year the biggest shock were not the possibilities that his friend could be interested, romantically, with him, that he too could be infatuated with him, it was that he was not afraid of what it meant and where it would have lead.
Bumblebee was the most beautiful and awesome thing of all time, ever, but Sam's worship of the transformer was deeper than that. As a guardian he was selfless and willing to protect at the cost of his life. As a friend he was forgiving, understanding, patient and in infinite quantity. Sam question his ability to be as flawless but just the thought of Bumblebee crawling with legs broken, and the anguish it invoked, it brought to surface a strength he did not fathom he possessed.
* * *
They returned to the river - it was their place where they could be free to be just a man and a machine.
"Oh," Sam said, suddenly reminded of the package he got through the mail that afternoon. "Yeah, speaking of anime, I got you something, Bee."
"Something?" Bumblebee revved the engine. "A present kind of something?"
The boy chuckled as the Camarao shook about.
"Since you keep watching it I thought you'd like it."
He rummaged through a sack and removed the envelope. It was visibly, almost comically overstuffed. He sliced it and revealed its content.
"It's Sesshoumaru, from Inuyasha, a nice, little plushie."
"Sweet! You got me Fluffy-Sama," Bumblebee said while Sam raised an eyebrow - Fluffy-Sama? he mouthed. "Put it on!"
Sam attached the end of the plushie onto the ever growing and expanding cluster of objects that dangled off of Bumblebee's rear view mirror. A honey-scented 'Beeotch' freshener. A dreamcatcher. A pair of jade dolphins. And a chibi Sesshoumaru with sword.
"Awesome! And, I got you something, too," the autobot announced.
"Buying off the internet again?" the boy teased.
"I plead the fifth! Well, I downloaded it, actually." The windshield flashed like a monitor. The speakers echoed the voice of Witney Houston. "It's called 'The Bodyguard'."
TBC