Lent Project
First off, for those who celebrate-Happy Easter and Happy Passover!
Second off, for those who watch Doctor Who-I see y’all tryna get me to watch this new season. I see you…
Third off-I had lunch on Friday with a Harvard classmate from my year whom I’d never “met” while I was there. The really ridiculous thing about that is we’d gone to SC Governor’s School Summer Program during the same year; we were the same major; we knew the same people; we were 2 of only 5/6 people from SC in our year; and we lived next door to each other for two years (she was in Kirkland & I was in Eliot). Not only that, we both had similar not-so-great experiences at Harvard, although she was on the other end of the spectrum in terms of dealing with out (outgoing/extroverted while I was isolating/introverted). Yet, we both have plans to go to our 5th reunion this May because it’s going to be our therapy in Owning Our Awesome in a way we couldn’t do while we were there. She and I even had a mutual appreciation for a guy in my proctor group (yes, he was that gorg, & the best things about him is he’s also a really sweet/kind person. Oh, if only I’d been more aware of “signals” back then…). And speaking of the 5th reunion, Harvard sent out a 5th Reunion report book and I’d written something on it. My bosses liked what I’d written so much they made copies and put the copies in everyone’s mailbox at work. Embarrassing, humbling, and finally appreciative was the emotional gamut I’d swung. Another Lent lesson there-what’d been an off the cuff “f-it, I’mma write what I’d been doing and f-it if it’s not as glorious as some of the other reports in the book” turned out to be meaningful to someone. A+, that. So, I’m going, and will meet up with my new Harvard BFF from SC and maybe even take bosoxqt with me!
Fourth off-I was in a car accident yesterday. I rear-ended the vehicle in front of me while we were at the light. We’d all been stopped and I’d looked down to put my wallet in my purse (I’d just left the bank) and when I looked up again, the taillights of the car before me weren’t red anymore, so I thought it was time to drive (key because the vehicle in front of me was an SUV and I couldn’t see the lights from where I was behind him). Apparently, this was an erroneous thought because the SUV wasn’t going anywhere. By the time I slammed on the brakes I’d slammed into the back of him. Dude was understandably irate, especially since, apparently, there was a 4-months pregnant woman in the vehicle. He started accusing me of being on the phone (I wasn’t) and drifting from understandably upset to being a jerk. I called Gma and I called Uncle and they weren’t mad, which pleasantly surprised me. Also, the other passengers in the SUV were calm after the initial shock of the accident-they even asked if I were okay. Driver was still ranting and took pictures of the damage-he maybe had a scratch on his ride. Maybe. I couldn’t see. My damage…well…
I was supposed to meet a new friend and go shopping (I’m going on a cruise on Saturday, heading to Miami on Thursday-I said this, right?), but, obviously, that didn’t happen. So we pull into a parking lot and get all the information. The cop (who was cute) asked people if they were okay (but, yo, I thought three cop cars was a bit overkill, but this was my first accident in the 10 years I’ve been driving so what do I know?). He actually asked me several times; I assume I looked more shaken than I thought I was-too busy trying to be zen I guess. But one of the passengers was really nice and we talked a little. But I started my “God is good” mantra because everyone (save the other driver) was really kind and understanding. The cop who filed the police report didn’t take any points off my license and gave me the cheapest ticket I could. Outside from the front/hood damage, the car was fine. There was no airbag deployment or anything and no one was hurt (although my lower back is feeling is again-it’d been unhappy with me last week for some reason or another…). I was literally chanting “God is good” from the drive from the accident scene to my house. I then made the necessary insurance claims and drove two hours to Cola so I can drop the car off to the family’s preferred body shop and switch cars from the other idle one at home.
Gma isn’t feeling well :(. I’m avoiding what’s increasingly becoming the inevitable. Jesus, hold me to the light on that day. I don’t want to think about it…but it’s funny, because even a year ago I think she would’ve been upset, but she was also zen. She was glad I was fine. I was really nervous about Uncle, because, well, I don’t have the greatest of relationships and anytime I’d made a mistake before he became a mandate on my failings. But he was upset, but he didn’t start that whole mandate business. I told him about the accident and what I’d done and then we started talking about my upcoming cruise and he told me a family friend had read two of my books and enjoyed them and then the man gave me $.
God is good.
After that, he let me go shopping in the house (tissues and paper towels-holla!) I picked up the food I’d forgotten when I’d been here last week and I left to go back home. I made a detour at my Godma’s house. We talked for much longer than I thought we would and she gave me my early birthday pressie-more $. But she also gave me tips on what to do on the cruise and what to pack and I hope I have a fun experience like she did. She also encouraged me to not be afraid to ask for help and to accept it when it’s offered. I’ve always had a problem with that, but it’s tied into the self-esteem/worth thing because you don’t feel like you’re important enough for someone to go out of their way for you. But I am. As my Godma said-they wouldn’t offer if they didn’t mean it.
God is good.
I know Lent is over, but I can only imagine how I would’ve handled everything. Probably freaking out, high strung, thinking my parents will disown me for the accident & say what an imbecile I am. Yeah, that’s not where I went and if I were to have an accident in my life, this is the kind of accident I’d want to have.
Fifth off-Speaking of the cruise, it’s a writers/readers’ conference on a cruise, so work-related. I’ll make myself have fun as an extension of the Lent project even though Lent’s officially over now. I got me a snazzy new netbook (I’m typing on it now; it’s love. Even the keyboard I’m getting over the learning curve hump!) and my cabinmate seems really nice. We spoke on the phone yesterday after months of me not responding to her (Lent Project had the side effect of pulling back on some things-the cruise plans was one of them because of my anxiety of inadequacy as a writer, fretting about what books to sell, etc.). My plans are the cruise and then going up to Boston for my choir’s 40th reunion, which before the Lent project would’ve given me much angst because as much as I love that choir-talk about feelings of inadequacy! Full of it then, but now I’m better able to handle those and combat it when it starts to happen. I still need to write a post about my singing and how that affected my writing, but that’ll come. As for the writing, I had an interesting conversation with a woman who knows my godma while I was at work, and she asked me about my writing journey and I had to explain to her about self-publishing and a mutual author that I love and hopefully she’ll love as well. And I recognized the authority & confidence in my voice that hadn’t always been there when I’d spoken about my writing. I’m going to be a different Savannah than many of them had seen 2 years ago when I’d first done this conference (oh, I was beyond green then! I’d only had 1 book to my name and I was just getting settled). I may even do karaoke on the cruise. Still debating :p
Sixth off-in addition to the netbook, I got a digital camera. This is epically important because I didn’t own a camera at all and I avoided pictures like the plague. Now, I’m going to take some of the cruise for my writing and be present. If anyone had any memories of the last conference(s) I’d been to, I wasn’t in the pictures. Why do that to myself? I was there and I shouldn’t be ashamed of that. So the camera purchase is epic, for the cruise and for the choir’s 40th. Savannah was there and here are non-Photoshopped pics to prove it!
Seventh off-last week also spoke with my cousin, and it was such a great conversation. I told her about my Lent project and she started rattling off all the awesome/sexy things she saw about me even though the assignment was for me to name 5 things about my physical self I liked. She also admitted her first kiss was also by a white guy, but hers was >>>>>> mine! She’s married to a black man now for just over 15 years (& he’s stupid in love with her, it gets to the point sometimes I have to remind those 2 on their facebooks that chirens are watching!), but her revelation just gave me more encouragement to like who I like (because I can admit some wariness about bringing a nonblack man home. Some hurts still haven’t lessened to that point yet in some people). And the five things-my skin, my hair, my eyes, my smile, my walk. I’m supposed to add more, so I’ll go ahead and add my booty. My booty is legend, dammit.
The next two weeks are going to be beyond busy-this week is cruise prep and next week is cruise/choir 40th. I probably won’t be around much during the cruise (hetairai, I’ll get back with you on a possible meetup!) but I’ll try to have awesome pics for y’all to see me have fun! Y’all have an awesome day week!
Second off, for those who watch Doctor Who-I see y’all tryna get me to watch this new season. I see you…
Third off-I had lunch on Friday with a Harvard classmate from my year whom I’d never “met” while I was there. The really ridiculous thing about that is we’d gone to SC Governor’s School Summer Program during the same year; we were the same major; we knew the same people; we were 2 of only 5/6 people from SC in our year; and we lived next door to each other for two years (she was in Kirkland & I was in Eliot). Not only that, we both had similar not-so-great experiences at Harvard, although she was on the other end of the spectrum in terms of dealing with out (outgoing/extroverted while I was isolating/introverted). Yet, we both have plans to go to our 5th reunion this May because it’s going to be our therapy in Owning Our Awesome in a way we couldn’t do while we were there. She and I even had a mutual appreciation for a guy in my proctor group (yes, he was that gorg, & the best things about him is he’s also a really sweet/kind person. Oh, if only I’d been more aware of “signals” back then…). And speaking of the 5th reunion, Harvard sent out a 5th Reunion report book and I’d written something on it. My bosses liked what I’d written so much they made copies and put the copies in everyone’s mailbox at work. Embarrassing, humbling, and finally appreciative was the emotional gamut I’d swung. Another Lent lesson there-what’d been an off the cuff “f-it, I’mma write what I’d been doing and f-it if it’s not as glorious as some of the other reports in the book” turned out to be meaningful to someone. A+, that. So, I’m going, and will meet up with my new Harvard BFF from SC and maybe even take bosoxqt with me!
Fourth off-I was in a car accident yesterday. I rear-ended the vehicle in front of me while we were at the light. We’d all been stopped and I’d looked down to put my wallet in my purse (I’d just left the bank) and when I looked up again, the taillights of the car before me weren’t red anymore, so I thought it was time to drive (key because the vehicle in front of me was an SUV and I couldn’t see the lights from where I was behind him). Apparently, this was an erroneous thought because the SUV wasn’t going anywhere. By the time I slammed on the brakes I’d slammed into the back of him. Dude was understandably irate, especially since, apparently, there was a 4-months pregnant woman in the vehicle. He started accusing me of being on the phone (I wasn’t) and drifting from understandably upset to being a jerk. I called Gma and I called Uncle and they weren’t mad, which pleasantly surprised me. Also, the other passengers in the SUV were calm after the initial shock of the accident-they even asked if I were okay. Driver was still ranting and took pictures of the damage-he maybe had a scratch on his ride. Maybe. I couldn’t see. My damage…well…
I was supposed to meet a new friend and go shopping (I’m going on a cruise on Saturday, heading to Miami on Thursday-I said this, right?), but, obviously, that didn’t happen. So we pull into a parking lot and get all the information. The cop (who was cute) asked people if they were okay (but, yo, I thought three cop cars was a bit overkill, but this was my first accident in the 10 years I’ve been driving so what do I know?). He actually asked me several times; I assume I looked more shaken than I thought I was-too busy trying to be zen I guess. But one of the passengers was really nice and we talked a little. But I started my “God is good” mantra because everyone (save the other driver) was really kind and understanding. The cop who filed the police report didn’t take any points off my license and gave me the cheapest ticket I could. Outside from the front/hood damage, the car was fine. There was no airbag deployment or anything and no one was hurt (although my lower back is feeling is again-it’d been unhappy with me last week for some reason or another…). I was literally chanting “God is good” from the drive from the accident scene to my house. I then made the necessary insurance claims and drove two hours to Cola so I can drop the car off to the family’s preferred body shop and switch cars from the other idle one at home.
Gma isn’t feeling well :(. I’m avoiding what’s increasingly becoming the inevitable. Jesus, hold me to the light on that day. I don’t want to think about it…but it’s funny, because even a year ago I think she would’ve been upset, but she was also zen. She was glad I was fine. I was really nervous about Uncle, because, well, I don’t have the greatest of relationships and anytime I’d made a mistake before he became a mandate on my failings. But he was upset, but he didn’t start that whole mandate business. I told him about the accident and what I’d done and then we started talking about my upcoming cruise and he told me a family friend had read two of my books and enjoyed them and then the man gave me $.
God is good.
After that, he let me go shopping in the house (tissues and paper towels-holla!) I picked up the food I’d forgotten when I’d been here last week and I left to go back home. I made a detour at my Godma’s house. We talked for much longer than I thought we would and she gave me my early birthday pressie-more $. But she also gave me tips on what to do on the cruise and what to pack and I hope I have a fun experience like she did. She also encouraged me to not be afraid to ask for help and to accept it when it’s offered. I’ve always had a problem with that, but it’s tied into the self-esteem/worth thing because you don’t feel like you’re important enough for someone to go out of their way for you. But I am. As my Godma said-they wouldn’t offer if they didn’t mean it.
God is good.
I know Lent is over, but I can only imagine how I would’ve handled everything. Probably freaking out, high strung, thinking my parents will disown me for the accident & say what an imbecile I am. Yeah, that’s not where I went and if I were to have an accident in my life, this is the kind of accident I’d want to have.
Fifth off-Speaking of the cruise, it’s a writers/readers’ conference on a cruise, so work-related. I’ll make myself have fun as an extension of the Lent project even though Lent’s officially over now. I got me a snazzy new netbook (I’m typing on it now; it’s love. Even the keyboard I’m getting over the learning curve hump!) and my cabinmate seems really nice. We spoke on the phone yesterday after months of me not responding to her (Lent Project had the side effect of pulling back on some things-the cruise plans was one of them because of my anxiety of inadequacy as a writer, fretting about what books to sell, etc.). My plans are the cruise and then going up to Boston for my choir’s 40th reunion, which before the Lent project would’ve given me much angst because as much as I love that choir-talk about feelings of inadequacy! Full of it then, but now I’m better able to handle those and combat it when it starts to happen. I still need to write a post about my singing and how that affected my writing, but that’ll come. As for the writing, I had an interesting conversation with a woman who knows my godma while I was at work, and she asked me about my writing journey and I had to explain to her about self-publishing and a mutual author that I love and hopefully she’ll love as well. And I recognized the authority & confidence in my voice that hadn’t always been there when I’d spoken about my writing. I’m going to be a different Savannah than many of them had seen 2 years ago when I’d first done this conference (oh, I was beyond green then! I’d only had 1 book to my name and I was just getting settled). I may even do karaoke on the cruise. Still debating :p
Sixth off-in addition to the netbook, I got a digital camera. This is epically important because I didn’t own a camera at all and I avoided pictures like the plague. Now, I’m going to take some of the cruise for my writing and be present. If anyone had any memories of the last conference(s) I’d been to, I wasn’t in the pictures. Why do that to myself? I was there and I shouldn’t be ashamed of that. So the camera purchase is epic, for the cruise and for the choir’s 40th. Savannah was there and here are non-Photoshopped pics to prove it!
Seventh off-last week also spoke with my cousin, and it was such a great conversation. I told her about my Lent project and she started rattling off all the awesome/sexy things she saw about me even though the assignment was for me to name 5 things about my physical self I liked. She also admitted her first kiss was also by a white guy, but hers was >>>>>> mine! She’s married to a black man now for just over 15 years (& he’s stupid in love with her, it gets to the point sometimes I have to remind those 2 on their facebooks that chirens are watching!), but her revelation just gave me more encouragement to like who I like (because I can admit some wariness about bringing a nonblack man home. Some hurts still haven’t lessened to that point yet in some people). And the five things-my skin, my hair, my eyes, my smile, my walk. I’m supposed to add more, so I’ll go ahead and add my booty. My booty is legend, dammit.
The next two weeks are going to be beyond busy-this week is cruise prep and next week is cruise/choir 40th. I probably won’t be around much during the cruise (hetairai, I’ll get back with you on a possible meetup!) but I’ll try to have awesome pics for y’all to see me have fun! Y’all have an awesome day week!