some more scattered thoughts
Steroids are evil and I’m glad I’m almost done them. They didn’t help anything and they’ve made me ridiculously sensitive to sunlight. I was already pale enough to get close to setting on fire when I walked outside but it’s actually gotten a lot worse and I got two mega sunburns in two days and a bit of heat stroke, again. And I’m getting pudgy. Not fat, it’s a special sort of water retention in the cheeks mostly that my mom refers to as ‘Moon Face’, but since most people don’t know I’m on some drugs causing it, I just look like I’m really letting myself go.
Also, my internet keeps going down, like ten times a day. What the fuck Shaw? It’s at the point of being down literally half the time now!!
I’m really confused about Sarah right now because I can’t sort out my own feelings and I’m too scared to talk about it with her until I’ve got myself figured out. The bottom line is that yes I want to be friends, but I also want more than that and I don’t know if I can get over that while staying so close to her. I thought it would be a more complicated, longer transition for her and not that we would go from girlfriends to best friends in a handful of days. It just feels weird. I don’t know if it’s bad, but it’s strange. And I don’t know what I want to change, if anything. It’s all just odd and I don’t know what to do about it.
So I made myself a profile on Plenty of Fish. Why did I do that?
Anyways, I should really stop complaining. Things are pretty exciting right now, pride is coming up soon and I’ve been confirmed to host the Pride Awards, so yay to that! There are some cool events coming up like the film nights, parade, etc and I’m looking forward to it all. I’m also excited for camp and finishing up my program to start a new job, whatever that might be. And I’ve been meeting lots of new bands and checking out awesome concerts, which has been great. I’m also working on some cool video projects and am really into uploading to YouTube right now. My boss has asked me to lead two special workshops about sexual diversity and homophobia with the people in my program and also a younger group in a connected program. I also have a plan to detox somewhere away from the city and get the fuck off my meds sometime in August or September, which is really exciting! I really hope my health improves a bit soon so I can enjoy the summer. Oh and maybe go to Vancouver. Busy busy!
Also, my internet keeps going down, like ten times a day. What the fuck Shaw? It’s at the point of being down literally half the time now!!
I’m really confused about Sarah right now because I can’t sort out my own feelings and I’m too scared to talk about it with her until I’ve got myself figured out. The bottom line is that yes I want to be friends, but I also want more than that and I don’t know if I can get over that while staying so close to her. I thought it would be a more complicated, longer transition for her and not that we would go from girlfriends to best friends in a handful of days. It just feels weird. I don’t know if it’s bad, but it’s strange. And I don’t know what I want to change, if anything. It’s all just odd and I don’t know what to do about it.
So I made myself a profile on Plenty of Fish. Why did I do that?
Anyways, I should really stop complaining. Things are pretty exciting right now, pride is coming up soon and I’ve been confirmed to host the Pride Awards, so yay to that! There are some cool events coming up like the film nights, parade, etc and I’m looking forward to it all. I’m also excited for camp and finishing up my program to start a new job, whatever that might be. And I’ve been meeting lots of new bands and checking out awesome concerts, which has been great. I’m also working on some cool video projects and am really into uploading to YouTube right now. My boss has asked me to lead two special workshops about sexual diversity and homophobia with the people in my program and also a younger group in a connected program. I also have a plan to detox somewhere away from the city and get the fuck off my meds sometime in August or September, which is really exciting! I really hope my health improves a bit soon so I can enjoy the summer. Oh and maybe go to Vancouver. Busy busy!