Crossovers = Automatic fail (usually)
I like crossovers more than I care to admit, despite how awful many of them tend to be. I make sure to approach them cautiously and ready for some lulz. Today, I searched for “crossovers” in the Fullmetal Alchemist section of the Pit and found these delightful summaries.
Sporking in bold
Blood Red
Crossover with Naruto. Edward Elric is a young State Alchemist leading as normal a life as a vampire hunter can. When he falls in love for the first time, he never imagined it would be with a vampire, especially one that he was out to kill. Yaoi, SasuEd
“How was your day, brother?”
“Oh, the usual. I was out hunting when I fell in love with an emo ninja vampire.”
“So...Normal day?”
“Yeah, pretty much.”
A Sense Of Loss
Crossover with Naruto. Oneshot. “He’s dead.” Sasuke said the words nobody wanted to believe were true. Especially not him. He took a shaky breath and stood up. “Oh, God,” He said under his breath quietly and left, slamming the waiting room door shut.
He’s dead, Jim! Seeing as how this one is by the same author as the SasuEd fic, I’m guessing that Ed dies and Sasuke will be attempting a human transmutation...I bet I'm right.
In His Own World
Crossover XMen: Evolution. After Ed goes through the gate he finds himself in a new world. He has no alchemic powers just his automail. 2yrs later he's discovered by the XMen alone & his mind SEEMS to be shut down. Story up for adoption.
It MUST be bad when the writer doesn’t want their own fic. (And I thought Ed came out of the Gate in WWI-era London?)
Oreta Tsubasa De
Crossover with an original unposted fiction. Ed, Al, and Roy find themselves hurled into a wild new adventure as worlds collide and the sacred barriers are broken. The trio of alchemists must team up with two new faces to stop the all consuming darkness.
Most badfic!writers will put their OCs in the FMA world. This writer makes a point of saying that the FMA characters are in their original story. Anyone else reminded of the Reese’s Cup commercials?
The fanfic that should never have been
FMA HP crossover, Ed is harry's body guard for his first year, how do you think that Harry survived all through his first year? well, it sure as hell wasn't dumb luck, ED: You can say that again... feh... maybe some Yaoi?
You know what? That title does the sporking for me.
Back in Time
Diana and Alex are singing. Scary, I know. Well somehow they get transported Back in time and all that and meet characters from FMA i don't own FMA o how i wish... later in chappies it becomes a naruto crossover, maybe O.o
Who are Diana and Alex? Moreover, what does any of this have to do with FMA or crossovers?
Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori
A FMA Final Fantasy crossover that got stuck in my head. Read at your own risk. Warning for obscure mythology references, and yaoi. SephirothxZack SephirothxCloudxZack TsengxReno EdwardxRoy VincentxCid CloudxReno RufusxTseng RufusxTsengxReno ScarxAlphons
I love these summaries that say “read at your own risk.’ I get all excited thinking that, maybe when I click it, a giant pit bull or an old guy with a shotgun will jump out and try to scare me off. Sadly, I'm usually disappointed.
All Too Typical
Crossover with Naruto. Ed is found half-dead in an abandoned building. He doesn't remember how he got there. With the help of criminal investigator Neji Hyuuga, can he help stop a mass murderer before he strikes again? KakaRoy, possible SasuEd
That’s like...Naruto, Fullmetal Alchemist, and CSI all in one fell swoop. I’m not sure if I should applaud or cry.
Alchemy and Magic Don't Mix
Well, I'm back! Ch. 1 and 2 redone! My hiatus has ended. Summary: Ed steps onto a strange transmutation circle and finds himself at Hogwarts! Can he find a way to get to his brother and return home? FMAxHP crossover. 10x better than before!
Yes, some portals to alternate dimensions have been known to masquerade as perfectly innocent transmutation circles on occasion. If you happen to see one just sitting around, I recommend that you don’t step in it. There’s a decent chance you could end up in a badfic.
Life's Worth?
this is for all those angst fans out there. it's not really happy...at times. not for minors, at all. full and better summary inside. This is an HPxFMA crossover
...Okay, I’ll bite. Somehow, the stress on how angst-filled and inappropriate for children this is draws me in like a fly to a bug zapper...
Full Summary: Al’s killed by the homunculi (sry Al fans), Ed is trying to cope and to for protection, is sent to Hogwarts. While there, he will learn magic. The rest of the military gang will join him there for extra protection and Roy will teach Alchemy. This story takes place during Harry’s fifth year.
Aw, not poor Al...So while Ed tries to cope, he is sent to Hogwarts “to for protection” and the rest of the “military gang” will join him for extra protection.
I gotta say, I’d read this last one just for the image of Roy’s subordinates relocating to Hogwarts and going about business as usual. Hawkeye would shoot things, Havok would threaten to eat someone's cat, all sorts of crazy things.
...I’d read it if it weren’t so awful, that is.
Sporking in bold
Blood Red
Crossover with Naruto. Edward Elric is a young State Alchemist leading as normal a life as a vampire hunter can. When he falls in love for the first time, he never imagined it would be with a vampire, especially one that he was out to kill. Yaoi, SasuEd
“How was your day, brother?”
“Oh, the usual. I was out hunting when I fell in love with an emo ninja vampire.”
“So...Normal day?”
“Yeah, pretty much.”
A Sense Of Loss
Crossover with Naruto. Oneshot. “He’s dead.” Sasuke said the words nobody wanted to believe were true. Especially not him. He took a shaky breath and stood up. “Oh, God,” He said under his breath quietly and left, slamming the waiting room door shut.
He’s dead, Jim! Seeing as how this one is by the same author as the SasuEd fic, I’m guessing that Ed dies and Sasuke will be attempting a human transmutation...I bet I'm right.
In His Own World
Crossover XMen: Evolution. After Ed goes through the gate he finds himself in a new world. He has no alchemic powers just his automail. 2yrs later he's discovered by the XMen alone & his mind SEEMS to be shut down. Story up for adoption.
It MUST be bad when the writer doesn’t want their own fic. (And I thought Ed came out of the Gate in WWI-era London?)
Oreta Tsubasa De
Crossover with an original unposted fiction. Ed, Al, and Roy find themselves hurled into a wild new adventure as worlds collide and the sacred barriers are broken. The trio of alchemists must team up with two new faces to stop the all consuming darkness.
Most badfic!writers will put their OCs in the FMA world. This writer makes a point of saying that the FMA characters are in their original story. Anyone else reminded of the Reese’s Cup commercials?
The fanfic that should never have been
FMA HP crossover, Ed is harry's body guard for his first year, how do you think that Harry survived all through his first year? well, it sure as hell wasn't dumb luck, ED: You can say that again... feh... maybe some Yaoi?
You know what? That title does the sporking for me.
Back in Time
Diana and Alex are singing. Scary, I know. Well somehow they get transported Back in time and all that and meet characters from FMA i don't own FMA o how i wish... later in chappies it becomes a naruto crossover, maybe O.o
Who are Diana and Alex? Moreover, what does any of this have to do with FMA or crossovers?
Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori
A FMA Final Fantasy crossover that got stuck in my head. Read at your own risk. Warning for obscure mythology references, and yaoi. SephirothxZack SephirothxCloudxZack TsengxReno EdwardxRoy VincentxCid CloudxReno RufusxTseng RufusxTsengxReno ScarxAlphons
I love these summaries that say “read at your own risk.’ I get all excited thinking that, maybe when I click it, a giant pit bull or an old guy with a shotgun will jump out and try to scare me off. Sadly, I'm usually disappointed.
All Too Typical
Crossover with Naruto. Ed is found half-dead in an abandoned building. He doesn't remember how he got there. With the help of criminal investigator Neji Hyuuga, can he help stop a mass murderer before he strikes again? KakaRoy, possible SasuEd
That’s like...Naruto, Fullmetal Alchemist, and CSI all in one fell swoop. I’m not sure if I should applaud or cry.
Alchemy and Magic Don't Mix
Well, I'm back! Ch. 1 and 2 redone! My hiatus has ended. Summary: Ed steps onto a strange transmutation circle and finds himself at Hogwarts! Can he find a way to get to his brother and return home? FMAxHP crossover. 10x better than before!
Yes, some portals to alternate dimensions have been known to masquerade as perfectly innocent transmutation circles on occasion. If you happen to see one just sitting around, I recommend that you don’t step in it. There’s a decent chance you could end up in a badfic.
Life's Worth?
this is for all those angst fans out there. it's not really happy...at times. not for minors, at all. full and better summary inside. This is an HPxFMA crossover
...Okay, I’ll bite. Somehow, the stress on how angst-filled and inappropriate for children this is draws me in like a fly to a bug zapper...
Full Summary: Al’s killed by the homunculi (sry Al fans), Ed is trying to cope and to for protection, is sent to Hogwarts. While there, he will learn magic. The rest of the military gang will join him there for extra protection and Roy will teach Alchemy. This story takes place during Harry’s fifth year.
Aw, not poor Al...So while Ed tries to cope, he is sent to Hogwarts “to for protection” and the rest of the “military gang” will join him for extra protection.
I gotta say, I’d read this last one just for the image of Roy’s subordinates relocating to Hogwarts and going about business as usual. Hawkeye would shoot things, Havok would threaten to eat someone's cat, all sorts of crazy things.
...I’d read it if it weren’t so awful, that is.