Harmful Stimming Strategies?
Hey guys! Just letting you all know I'm doing alright in my family situation, and asking a question about stimming.
I haven't attempted to accurately assess how often I stim, but as a guess I'd say at least forty percent of my day, more if I'm experiencing an emotional influx of any sort. Most of it, clapping, hand flapping,foot tapping/swinging, wringing hands and rocking I don't mind, they can even be calming. But I have one stimming behavior that's really starting to scare me.
That's pacing. I'll get up and take off, in intricate patterns at speeds from a walk to a full out run without any input visual or audio alerting me to the fact that I've moved at all. While this has caused me to slip and fall, run into people or things moved into my path and on one memorable occasion run straight into a wall and generally gives me a sense of disorientation, I can deal. the problem is I've taken to going OUTSIDE the house when I do this and that scares the heck out of me; I become aware that I've lost time and am not where I thought I was, instead I'm standing at the end of our driveway staring into the street.
Like I said, I don't mind/enjoy most stimming behavior, but this one holds the possibility of physical harm. Locking the door doesn't work consistently, neither does post it notes (I have no visual input during these times, it's kind of like a blackout you don't realize you've had until it's over), rigorous exercise to tire myself out, or changes in location (I will pace in other people's houses, or public places). If I tie myself to the object I'm sitting/lying in/on I come out of it if it trips me, or I knock the object over, but this is destructive and doesn't do anything if the knot doesn't hold. I've also become aware halfway through untying myself, or several steps after I tripped and got up, so that probably won't work at all for long since apparently I can learn when I'm not in my conscious mind. Pain seems to work, but it takes a good 10 to 40 seconds (by estimation, and deduction of where I fell since I usually I have no remembrance of it) for me to realize I'm in pain. Startling me works sometimes, so putting a joy buzzer or something on the doorknob might work though I'm not crazy about trying it, seeing as it puts me in an upset mood.
I don't like asking others to stop me, it gets them irritated and snappy and sparks the whole "you're making it up/exaggerating/ attention seeking" discussion, and I HATE that discussion.
Does this happen to anyone else? Does anyone have any ideas of how I can keep myself safely indoors independently, or is this something I'm just going to have to ask and put up with the attitude over? Thanks.
I haven't attempted to accurately assess how often I stim, but as a guess I'd say at least forty percent of my day, more if I'm experiencing an emotional influx of any sort. Most of it, clapping, hand flapping,foot tapping/swinging, wringing hands and rocking I don't mind, they can even be calming. But I have one stimming behavior that's really starting to scare me.
That's pacing. I'll get up and take off, in intricate patterns at speeds from a walk to a full out run without any input visual or audio alerting me to the fact that I've moved at all. While this has caused me to slip and fall, run into people or things moved into my path and on one memorable occasion run straight into a wall and generally gives me a sense of disorientation, I can deal. the problem is I've taken to going OUTSIDE the house when I do this and that scares the heck out of me; I become aware that I've lost time and am not where I thought I was, instead I'm standing at the end of our driveway staring into the street.
Like I said, I don't mind/enjoy most stimming behavior, but this one holds the possibility of physical harm. Locking the door doesn't work consistently, neither does post it notes (I have no visual input during these times, it's kind of like a blackout you don't realize you've had until it's over), rigorous exercise to tire myself out, or changes in location (I will pace in other people's houses, or public places). If I tie myself to the object I'm sitting/lying in/on I come out of it if it trips me, or I knock the object over, but this is destructive and doesn't do anything if the knot doesn't hold. I've also become aware halfway through untying myself, or several steps after I tripped and got up, so that probably won't work at all for long since apparently I can learn when I'm not in my conscious mind. Pain seems to work, but it takes a good 10 to 40 seconds (by estimation, and deduction of where I fell since I usually I have no remembrance of it) for me to realize I'm in pain. Startling me works sometimes, so putting a joy buzzer or something on the doorknob might work though I'm not crazy about trying it, seeing as it puts me in an upset mood.
I don't like asking others to stop me, it gets them irritated and snappy and sparks the whole "you're making it up/exaggerating/ attention seeking" discussion, and I HATE that discussion.
Does this happen to anyone else? Does anyone have any ideas of how I can keep myself safely indoors independently, or is this something I'm just going to have to ask and put up with the attitude over? Thanks.