INSPIRATION IS DEATH
Dear Mr Genitals,
Lately, I am paranoid about my phone trying to kill me. It beeps as loud
as possible, and vibrates! Like, a vibrating... machete!!!
AGH!!! IT'S GETTING ME NOW!!
*BEEP*
Dear *BEEP*,
I find it hard to believe that a human being who speaks English could possibly be killed by a mobile phone. However, HTML is surprisingly easy, so be careful when it is possible for you to swallow small objects.
Machetes usually won't vibrate unless particularly inspired to try their best. Have you got any inspirational pictures lying about the home? Many people often first suspect the boiling water with high scalding potential, the rabid dog with 3 inch fangs, etc, when the actual culprit is more often than not a seemingly harmless, and possibly inspirational poster or friendly fridge magnet. Scientists have found that up to 64% of all household accidents or stabbings are a direct or indirect result of inspirational posters*.
A definite NO.
An absolute YES YES.
However, vibrating things aren't always bad. Trust me, Genitals is my second name!
And remember, it's not about how small the vibrating object is, it's about how well you use it, or incidentally how much of a choking hazard it is.
Try not to die.
~Dr Genitals~
*This is a lie.*
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