Happy Birthday Queen Elizabeth Please Don't Read This

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Bugger bugger bugger!

GWEN. RHYS. I need festive Welsh dishes and fairy cakes! Rhys, I know you can do amazing things with snacks. I'm on my knees and not in the fun way!

HART, drag yourself in and bathe. I will hose you down if I must and you won't enjoy it as much as it sounds like you will

Comments

[neifile7]

If Myfanwy has refrained to date from eating Max, she's not likely to find the corgis more appetizing. Although I suppose you could always trot out the beagle armor and have the Doctor do some sonic mods.

Teaching Max to curtsey is likely to prove more of a training challenge, I should think.

[xtricks]

Doesn't he just have to bow?

[ask_captainjack]

THERESA CAN'T BOW! He's still learning SHAKE PAW.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

HRH WILL HAVE TO BE SATISFIED WITH A HIGH FIVE. He's good at those!

[gwen_e_cooper]

Oh FFS. There goes my day off.

Welsh dishes. Right. Leek soup. Meat and... potatoes. Wait, is this brunch? Heart-shaped crempogs?

Fairy cakes! I'll have them done with little coronets on.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Tea! No meat and potatoes, but leek soup would probably be welcome, it's supposed to be wet tomorrow. (Rain? in Cardiff? OH SURELY NOT.)

Don't forget candles!

[ask_arealdoctor]

I'll pick up candles along with the flowers and bunting and tea. Serviettes? Finger sandwiches? What else do we need?

Oh my God, I have to go clean out the morgue.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

I've got Rhys on snacks, he'll be brilliant. Serviettes! Yes!

I'll help you with the morgue. I may be stuffing a few things in one of the unoccupied drawers.

[ask_arealdoctor]

I'm on it! We'll need lots of bunting and little flags and such. And flowers. She likes flowers. And I'll grab as many different types of tea as I can find in the shops.

I don't have to wear my UNIT uniform, do I? I hope not.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Shout TORCHWOOD if anyone bothers you!

I don't think you need to wear the uniform, you're seconded to Torchwood now. Though I'm sure you look jaunty in the beret --

No time for that! I have to prepare for the inevitability of John Hart.

[ask_arealdoctor]

No one expects the inevitability of John Hart! His chief weapon is surprise... and fear... and body odour!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Don't forget the guns, swords, and grenades!

[askfor_bananas]

Martha doesn't need to pick out teas if we're pressed for time, the TARDIS has plenty.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Are we sure none of them will poison humans? Can we pick those out and leave them behind?

[askfor_bananas]

No, we can't. I'm secretly trying to poison the Queen. Of course we can! The ones that are poisonous for humans are kept in the green kitchen. Anything in the yellow kitchen- the one where the coffeemaker used to be- is safe for humans.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Well, I don't know, I'm sure, you're an alien, maybe you don't think of these things!

Right, I'm raiding the yellow kitchen, don't let the TARDIS think I'm stealing.

[woman_of_]

Calm Ianto, Calm! I've heard she is very nice and polite, shaking your hand before moving on to the next person.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

I am calm! I am brilliant at last-minute birthdays. We do at least three a year for Jack (linear, non-linear, and surprise).

[timeagency]

My sister (yes THAT sister) met the Queen whilst on assignment int the 20th. She says she's a delightful lady, so long as you don't insult any of her family. She apparently thinks Charles is quite the handsome lad. So ban that line of conversation and you should be just fine.

My sister also says that Jack's uniform was already showing some wear in the elbows then but that a quick dose of Camoshielding will hide that. There will be some in the pouch you get last week. It won't be marketed until the 22nd but I think in this case the timestream can give a little bit, don't you?

[ask_aboutcoffee]

I don't see the harm, it's only to make his elbows look nice for the Queen, and who doesn't want to have nice elbows for the Queen?

We all have our blind spots. I suppose children are the biggest...