My paranoia is yet again fucking things up. I should be able to say this is happening and it’s good, but no I think this is happening and it’s good but what happens if this does, or they say something, or the rumors start up again, or no one talks ( Read more... )

Its amazing how one sentence can fuck everything up.

Oh yer…I have my rouge hair back! Soon to be green or blue

School- I want to quit, I know that I only have about 3 months left but the days I go are truly agonizing. The work’s hard- which normally would appeal to me but for some reason I’m finding it incredibly hard to get motivated. I think this is because I know that I won’t get a good enter score and won’t be able to go onto uni like my friends did ( Read more... )

My ex boyfriend has is going to have a new girlfriend, this is a good thing I guess. Friendships change when people start going out with new people, it brings in others who normally wouldn’t hang around each other, it also means that time has to be spread even thinner between the people and this is where the problem begins. My ex boyfriend, Mark, ( Read more... )

I like to know when people are talking behind my back but god it hurts.

what is it with me and rockabilly guys named Saun, granted i only spoke to this one for like 5 mintues but still. evil evil name

I think it’s only when you need friends you understand how little you have. I’ve had a lot of people saying that they don’t care when they lose a friend because they really weren’t there to start with but sadly I don’t think like that. I understand that I have done things wrong but that’s me, being too honest and trying to send hints. I want them ( Read more... )

I'm feeling really stupid at the moment, I've spent that last week caring for and looking after my father for him to repay me as treating me as his verbal punching bag. Because mum is so stressed and pissed off he is 'helping her' by taking me to school, it just so happens that the 20 minute car ride is a great way to tell me what a awful bitch I ( Read more... )

I was fine a mintute ago, thinking of what to write. That I had been to the doctors and he put me on more pain medication and that whenever my family has a problem I fell abandoned. I start with my old habits again, drugs and cutting.
When I was 12/13 my brother run a way, we thought he was dead, it was the first time that I had a major addication ( Read more... )

I try so hard to become well, to not relapse into the half dead stick. Telling myself that what I see is wrong, that no one else sees me the way I do. And I was right, they don’t, they could never handle the ugliness inside of me.

Do I hate him or praise him for telling me the truth, telling me how I look, not to eat, what’s wrong with me.

I can ( Read more... )