in anticipation of halloween...
jack skellington, from the nightmare before christmas.. one of my favorite movies ever!
emily the strange..
i'm so excited for halloween! where i can dress up, play, be silly, eat candy (but hopefully not the hershey and snickers kind), dance until midnight (if i can make it that far), watch tim burton movies (with natalie!), and all that wonderful stuff that comes along with this holiday. and really, it is a special, sacred holiday to the pagans.. a celebration of autumn and the harvest. and i have lots of harvested goodies from the garden! lots of tomatos and flowers.
i had a doctor's appointment today. i heard onyx's heartbeat, which was beautiful, and had my doctor look over my birth plan. he agreed with all of it and was very open and kind.. i'm so glad to have him as my doctor! he is a wonderful person as well, completely aside from what he does as his profession. i'm so super lucky! although.. is luck even real? i think not! i'm so thankful to the universe, myself, and onyx for co-creating this health care provider!
and i have been reading, reading, reading.. i just finished 'vampireville' this morning. such a silly, cheesy, not-so-well written story. but i still enjoyed it and read it like crazy. i think i liked the picture on the front so much that it motivated me to read it all through :) i'm going to start 'wings' next.. it's about fairies and i have been wanting to read it ever since i discovered its existence. and a few days ago, it popped up at the library! it was a very exciting moment for me. how easily entertained and pleased i am.. and it was silly because there was a man behind me, sitting at the library table. he was talking to himself while looking at the newspapers. saying things like, "these newspapers are just a bunch of scams, can't believe everything that's said in them." and "pretty soon, before you know it, they will be coming to get us." but it was all jumbled and random and i actually was very entertained while looking for books, just listening to him.
and... another silly thing happened today. it may not sound all that funny, but to me it was the funniest thing ever and i laughed and laughed out loud. i was on the phone to sam at the time, and he was laughing with me but wasn't sure what was even so funny.. i was driving and i saw an old man standing on the sidewalk, looking like he was about to step into the crosswalk. so i stopped for him so he could walk across, and he got very flustered and started waving his arms back and forth, as if to say 'don't even look at me or even think of stopping for me!' i almost expected him to yell something at me.. it was the strangest thing, and it seemed to be the funniest thing ever!
it seems that something wonderful happens every day.. and maybe seems is not the best word, because these wonderful things truly do happen, and i am so thankful for them. maybe they are small things in others' eyes, but to me they mean a lot and have their own beauty. like i will get a loving comment from a friend, or someone will tell me how happy they are to see me, or a new and exciting idea will pop up in my head, or the beautiful autumn wind will feel so cool and good against my skin.. these things make life wonderful and beautiful and inspiring and lovely!
so here's a list of things i am forever and magically thankful for~
*getting asked if i would like help carrying things, even if i don't take the offers..
*mango licorice! it's from the brand darrell lee.. please try some! it's so yummy, more than any licorice i have ever tasted, and i am a big licorice-coinneseur
*black clothing. i love the color black, and i have a lot of garments that are black and dark.. something about the color black is very protective and comforting to me. in 8th grade i began to love black and feel safe and beautiful in black, and i have ever since then.. i will never give up my dark roots. and how can i anyway? i am a human being
*library books. i love libraries.. i love the concept of them. free books to read! for everyone! all you have to do is get a card!
*anticipation for halloween and all the wonderful celebrations of autumn. there is a witch's ball at the dance center where i had the natural birth class, and a music show at the theatre in town that hasn't been played in for ages, and the dressing up, and the pumpkins and pumpkin patches, and pumpkin pie! too many wonderful things.. and onyx will be celebrating with me for the first time :) that makes it even better of course!
*the fall weather.. the gold, brown, orange, red leaves.. the dusky blue sky.. the wind that makes the trees dance.. and the sun that is still warm
*people doing silly things that bring massive laughter! as well as.. me doing silly things that provoke laughter in others!
*the new prenatal yoga video that a lovely lady let me borrow.. i love it! it's an amazing workout and brings out such feelings of health and balance within me
*the nightmare before christmas, emily the strange, skelanimals
*the deer that come down to eat behind my house.. they like to eat the sweet pea that grows, and it's beautiful to watch them. it's usually two does and a baby.. the baby is slowly losing his spots.
*showing my doctor my birth plan and having him be completely open and responsive to it. yes, yay!
*my wonderful, determined, generous, silly mama.. she's inspiring in so many ways. she definitely chooses to tough it out, even if life feels very uncomfortable and unstable at times.
*sam, always sam.. he's beautiful. in too many ways to write or say or think or know.
*onyx! i have such a sweet and perfect little family! i wouldn't want life any other way..
*people i know who are taking risks.. heidi and her 3-month trip through guatemala, brazil, and central america.. natalie moving away to go to art school in about a month.. serenity auditioning for what she truly loves, which is singing. all of these girls are doing things that are scary to them, but they are creating beautiful, new opportunities and experiences along the way! it inspires me to take more risks.. do things that are potentially scary for me. to step up in life and truly figure out where my passions lie and what i can do with them.. first thing is first, and i would like to focus on being a mama to onyx, but i might also like to go to school, or take some kind of classes, or.. or.. a million things..
*my garden. it's so beautiful as it's slowly preparing itself for sleep. i am still getting lots of yummy tomatos and beautiful flowers!
*my family, friends, pets, baby! they are all such important, vital, amazing parts of my life and experience.. i'm so glad to have them in my life!
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