A lesson in, um, accounting?
Mark and I went to do our taxes last week. Now we have used this accountant for three years, but I had never met her. Mark just always went and took care of everything. But I had to go this time to set everything up for my extra contract income for 2010.
Having been to an accountant before, I assumed it would be somewhat long and boring, but to the point. Boy was I wrong.
I knew things weren't going to go how I expected when we pulled up to a little ramshackle building. When we walked in, the entire place was decorated with floral prints, angels, doilies and unicorns. Imagine Dolores Umbridge's decorating tastes.
So we go in and sit down. I make the mistake of asking about a photo of a little kid she has pinned up, (you know, to be nice) and she proceeds to tell us a 15 minute long story about that child and all her baby daddy woes. Seriously.
The entire meeting continued in this fashion. In fact, here is the text message transcript that took place between me and Susan over the course of the two hours we were there:
Me: At the tax lady's office and she is talking to us in baby talk. seriously.
Susan: Um, have you used her before.
Me: Mark has. This is my first time to come with him. I may pull my hair out... or hers.
And there are floral prints and bunnies and angels and dolls all over her office. I'm frightened.
Susan: Oh Lord.
Me: Oh my and a 60-year-old woman in green dasy dukes and tie die just walked in. Lol at least it's entertaining.
Susan: How did Mark find this lady?
Me: His mom uses her. This is his third year to use her.
But she is a gambler and is trying to get us a couple free Goo Goo Doll tix...
Now we are getting a lecture on Revelations and Right Wing politics. Help me!
Susan: Ahahahaha! Stay calm. The rapture is coming!
Me: Now we are getting the rapture lecture. Digging fingernails in.
And now it's expensive restaurant food and how salt makes her swell up. Let it be done already!
Surprisingly though, she was actually fantastic with mine and Mark's taxes, despite her frequent ADD breaks to say things like "you two will have beautiful children, I love your eyes," and "This guy (Mark) is just one of these guys that feel like my sons. I just love them. I love them so much I'm going to take $25 off your tax prep fee" (which was hella expensive, btw).
I later asked Mark if she always talked like this. He said no, that it was particularly worse because I was there.
Of course it was.
Having been to an accountant before, I assumed it would be somewhat long and boring, but to the point. Boy was I wrong.
I knew things weren't going to go how I expected when we pulled up to a little ramshackle building. When we walked in, the entire place was decorated with floral prints, angels, doilies and unicorns. Imagine Dolores Umbridge's decorating tastes.
So we go in and sit down. I make the mistake of asking about a photo of a little kid she has pinned up, (you know, to be nice) and she proceeds to tell us a 15 minute long story about that child and all her baby daddy woes. Seriously.
The entire meeting continued in this fashion. In fact, here is the text message transcript that took place between me and Susan over the course of the two hours we were there:
Me: At the tax lady's office and she is talking to us in baby talk. seriously.
Susan: Um, have you used her before.
Me: Mark has. This is my first time to come with him. I may pull my hair out... or hers.
And there are floral prints and bunnies and angels and dolls all over her office. I'm frightened.
Susan: Oh Lord.
Me: Oh my and a 60-year-old woman in green dasy dukes and tie die just walked in. Lol at least it's entertaining.
Susan: How did Mark find this lady?
Me: His mom uses her. This is his third year to use her.
But she is a gambler and is trying to get us a couple free Goo Goo Doll tix...
Now we are getting a lecture on Revelations and Right Wing politics. Help me!
Susan: Ahahahaha! Stay calm. The rapture is coming!
Me: Now we are getting the rapture lecture. Digging fingernails in.
And now it's expensive restaurant food and how salt makes her swell up. Let it be done already!
Surprisingly though, she was actually fantastic with mine and Mark's taxes, despite her frequent ADD breaks to say things like "you two will have beautiful children, I love your eyes," and "This guy (Mark) is just one of these guys that feel like my sons. I just love them. I love them so much I'm going to take $25 off your tax prep fee" (which was hella expensive, btw).
I later asked Mark if she always talked like this. He said no, that it was particularly worse because I was there.
Of course it was.