This is going to be a long process
Wow, it's like she is trying to erase me from her life.
I read all of the letters she gave me, today. I figured I would eventually have to do that, so I may as well have gotten around to it.
I don't understand how... How it's possible to tell someone they will always have a shoulder to lean on, and that you will love them always and forever and then just eradicate them like this. Doesn't she have any feelings or emotions? What did I do to deserve this? What did I do???
I'm really shaken up right now. I'm having a really down state. I remember when I asked for time apart from her, and I was so much more sympathetic than this. I would still go see her, and I was very considerate of her feelings. How am I ever going to be able to trust someone again after this?
What the fuck am I supposed to do? Keep listening to deep trance songs, or writing in this fucking online journal to fight these feelings and make myself alright?
I guess so.
That's all I really have, along with friends and family and my own mind. Oh my God, this hurts so much. But what else can I do, but push through and make myself feel better. I'm a strong motherfuckin' person and I have to pull my pants up and move on with life.
But I really don't want to. I want to be with Ceejay again. I want to be able to show her how much I love her and how much I care for her. I was such a good boyfriend. Why...?
Yo, I didn't know what else to do, so I figured I would just vent before I went to work. I can't do a 10 hour shift this depressed. By the time I leave, hopefully I will be ok.
Ant
I read all of the letters she gave me, today. I figured I would eventually have to do that, so I may as well have gotten around to it.
I don't understand how... How it's possible to tell someone they will always have a shoulder to lean on, and that you will love them always and forever and then just eradicate them like this. Doesn't she have any feelings or emotions? What did I do to deserve this? What did I do???
I'm really shaken up right now. I'm having a really down state. I remember when I asked for time apart from her, and I was so much more sympathetic than this. I would still go see her, and I was very considerate of her feelings. How am I ever going to be able to trust someone again after this?
What the fuck am I supposed to do? Keep listening to deep trance songs, or writing in this fucking online journal to fight these feelings and make myself alright?
I guess so.
That's all I really have, along with friends and family and my own mind. Oh my God, this hurts so much. But what else can I do, but push through and make myself feel better. I'm a strong motherfuckin' person and I have to pull my pants up and move on with life.
But I really don't want to. I want to be with Ceejay again. I want to be able to show her how much I love her and how much I care for her. I was such a good boyfriend. Why...?
Yo, I didn't know what else to do, so I figured I would just vent before I went to work. I can't do a 10 hour shift this depressed. By the time I leave, hopefully I will be ok.
Ant