Have you ever noticed that you always seem to get laid on the first of April?

Have you ever noticed that you never seem to get laid on Xmas Eve?

Not that I'd probably have the energy after work today anyway.

Have you ever noticed that you never seem to get laid on Easter weekend... unless you're an egg?

Have you noticed that you never seem to get laid on Friday the 13th? Just as well I guess. That Voorhees kid would probably sneak up on you while you were "in the act".

Have you ever noticed that you never seem to get laid when you turn 48?

Have you ever noticed you never seem to get laid on Thanksgiving? Probably because the cat is on the bed...


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Have you ever noticed that you never seem to get laid on Halloween?

Have you ever noticed that you never seem to get laid on the fourth of July?

Have you ever noticed that you never seem to get laid on Father's Day?

Have you ever noticed that you never seem to be off work OR get laid on Thanksgiving?

/double whammy!