[fic] What you mean to me - Yugioh, YnYxYugi, general/serious, G, theme 044 (100_chances)
Theme: 044- What you mean to me; for 100_chances
Author: Chey (duelist_gurl163)
Rating: G
Genre: General/serious
Pairings: Yami no YugixYugi implied
Archive: Here
Warnings: None
Spoilers: None.
Summary: It was too late to go back to a normal life, but Yugi wouldn't even if he could.
Disclaimer: Still not mine.
---
Despite how exhausted Yugi should have been, he couldn’t fall asleep. Every time he closed his eyes, visions of the evening would flash across his eyelids. The semi-finals of the Battle City tournament had left Bakura, Mai, and Rishid unconscious, Jounouchi had barely escaped serious injury, and Marik had lost control of himself to some sinister alter personality.
It was too much for someone to take and accept without question. Yugi worried sometimes how much more he could take. It didn’t matter who was counting on him, the human mind had a breaking point. What if someday he just shut down? What if a time came when he couldn’t handle these things anymore? He was just a kid, really. Almost all of them were, yet their lives had been stained by darkness and madness that any normal person wouldn’t even believe could exist.
Yugi had been normal, once. He could barely remember a time like that now, a life without magic or danger or…
A strange chill swept his body for a moment, startling him.
Aibou? A disembodied voice floated over. Yugi sat up and saw his other self’s projection appear on the side of the bed.
“What is it mou hitori no boku?”
His other self was careful not to meet his eyes, sending up warning flags in Yugi’s mind already. “Why aren’t you asleep?” he asked. “You need rest.”
“I know, it’s just that so much has happened today…” Yugi said, getting the feeling that wasn’t what the spirit had intended to say. He peered at the misty form. His other self hadn’t said much to him this evening either. Yugi assumed he had a lot on his mind, too. Maybe he wanted to talk about what had happened.
“You’re probably tired too, aren’t you?” he said, scrunching the blankets in his fingers. “You went through a lot today, used a lot of your power. You should be resting, too.”
“I’m fine.” The spirit still wasn’t meeting his eyes, which both puzzled and worried Yugi. He decided to bite the bullet and ask straight out:
“Is there something you want to talk about?”
His other self hesitated. “I…I guess there is…one thing.”
“What’s that?”
The spirit’s projection appeared to shift its weight, whatever weight a ghost had. “It’s not a big deal,” he said quickly, his appearance fading a little, before Yugi reached out and touched his hand lightly to his arm. It always felt odd, touching the spirit, who felt like neither solid nor air, but a sort of mutable substance that he could feel, but not hold too tightly.
“If it’s something that’s been bothering you, you can tell me. It’s okay. I want to know.”
His other self swallowed. “I have…been wondering…do you regret solving the puzzle?”
Yugi was stunned, unable to speak, leaving the spirit the opportunity to say in a rush, “If you had not, if we had never merged, you wouldn’t be here right now. Your friends wouldn’t be in the hospital, your lives wouldn’t be in danger. You could be…normal.”
Yugi realized suddenly that the spirit must have sensed his unprotected thoughts earlier.
“Oh, mou hitori-”
“I’m sorry, aibou,” he continued, looking down at his hands. “I’m sorry I couldn’t prevent your possession, that I couldn’t have vanished somehow-”
“Mou hitori no boku, stop!” Yugi said, tightening his grip, his fingers suddenly sliding through the projection in his agitation. “How long have you been thinking this?”
The spirit’s eyes widened. “I…not for very long.”
The lie was so blatant that Yugi didn’t even bother to try to believe it. He slumped slightly, bringing his hands to his head. “Mou hitori no boku…how could I have let you continue to believe that?”
“I didn’t bring it up before,” the spirit said, alarmed, reaching out for him now. “You couldn’t have been expected to magically know…”
“But I’ve seen you feel guilty before, over what your presence caused. I should have known, should have thought…” Yugi shook his head. “You should never have to wonder about this!”
“Aibou…?”
He seemed to compose himself for a moment, then lowered his hands and met the spirit’s eyes before the spirit could look away. “I want you to tell me the truth, mou hitori no boku. Tell me, what am I to you? Am I just your host?”
The spirit drew in a breath. “No, of course not. I cannot see you as just a host. Aibou…you are…my friend, my family…you are everything. You mean everything to me.”
“Exactly,” Yugi said, ignoring the flutter in his heart that the words caused. “So don’t you see? That’s how I feel about you. You aren’t another personality or a responsibility to me, you’re a person. You’re a friend. I could never…never regret you. I never want you to think that I could.”
“But…but your life-”
“I don’t want that normal life,” Yugi interrupted. “I made my choice to keep on this path with you. It’s human to wonder about what I gave up, but I knew what I was doing when I chose not to just disassemble the Puzzle and give up. I don’t regret it. You mean too much, you…”
You mean more than anything.
Even though he refrained from saying the words, he made no attempt to block the thought. Something in the spirit’s eyes gentled, and the corners of his lips tugged upwards.
“I understand,” he said softly.
X - X - X
Notes: Ah, the discussion-in-the-middle-of-the-night scene. I’ve done several, and I’m destined to write several more. It’s a staple of Puzzleshippers, I think.
Based on a scene from volume 10 of Silver Diamond. x3
The new Yugioh movie came out in Japan today. Rejoice!
Author: Chey (duelist_gurl163)
Rating: G
Genre: General/serious
Pairings: Yami no YugixYugi implied
Archive: Here
Warnings: None
Spoilers: None.
Summary: It was too late to go back to a normal life, but Yugi wouldn't even if he could.
Disclaimer: Still not mine.
---
Despite how exhausted Yugi should have been, he couldn’t fall asleep. Every time he closed his eyes, visions of the evening would flash across his eyelids. The semi-finals of the Battle City tournament had left Bakura, Mai, and Rishid unconscious, Jounouchi had barely escaped serious injury, and Marik had lost control of himself to some sinister alter personality.
It was too much for someone to take and accept without question. Yugi worried sometimes how much more he could take. It didn’t matter who was counting on him, the human mind had a breaking point. What if someday he just shut down? What if a time came when he couldn’t handle these things anymore? He was just a kid, really. Almost all of them were, yet their lives had been stained by darkness and madness that any normal person wouldn’t even believe could exist.
Yugi had been normal, once. He could barely remember a time like that now, a life without magic or danger or…
A strange chill swept his body for a moment, startling him.
Aibou? A disembodied voice floated over. Yugi sat up and saw his other self’s projection appear on the side of the bed.
“What is it mou hitori no boku?”
His other self was careful not to meet his eyes, sending up warning flags in Yugi’s mind already. “Why aren’t you asleep?” he asked. “You need rest.”
“I know, it’s just that so much has happened today…” Yugi said, getting the feeling that wasn’t what the spirit had intended to say. He peered at the misty form. His other self hadn’t said much to him this evening either. Yugi assumed he had a lot on his mind, too. Maybe he wanted to talk about what had happened.
“You’re probably tired too, aren’t you?” he said, scrunching the blankets in his fingers. “You went through a lot today, used a lot of your power. You should be resting, too.”
“I’m fine.” The spirit still wasn’t meeting his eyes, which both puzzled and worried Yugi. He decided to bite the bullet and ask straight out:
“Is there something you want to talk about?”
His other self hesitated. “I…I guess there is…one thing.”
“What’s that?”
The spirit’s projection appeared to shift its weight, whatever weight a ghost had. “It’s not a big deal,” he said quickly, his appearance fading a little, before Yugi reached out and touched his hand lightly to his arm. It always felt odd, touching the spirit, who felt like neither solid nor air, but a sort of mutable substance that he could feel, but not hold too tightly.
“If it’s something that’s been bothering you, you can tell me. It’s okay. I want to know.”
His other self swallowed. “I have…been wondering…do you regret solving the puzzle?”
Yugi was stunned, unable to speak, leaving the spirit the opportunity to say in a rush, “If you had not, if we had never merged, you wouldn’t be here right now. Your friends wouldn’t be in the hospital, your lives wouldn’t be in danger. You could be…normal.”
Yugi realized suddenly that the spirit must have sensed his unprotected thoughts earlier.
“Oh, mou hitori-”
“I’m sorry, aibou,” he continued, looking down at his hands. “I’m sorry I couldn’t prevent your possession, that I couldn’t have vanished somehow-”
“Mou hitori no boku, stop!” Yugi said, tightening his grip, his fingers suddenly sliding through the projection in his agitation. “How long have you been thinking this?”
The spirit’s eyes widened. “I…not for very long.”
The lie was so blatant that Yugi didn’t even bother to try to believe it. He slumped slightly, bringing his hands to his head. “Mou hitori no boku…how could I have let you continue to believe that?”
“I didn’t bring it up before,” the spirit said, alarmed, reaching out for him now. “You couldn’t have been expected to magically know…”
“But I’ve seen you feel guilty before, over what your presence caused. I should have known, should have thought…” Yugi shook his head. “You should never have to wonder about this!”
“Aibou…?”
He seemed to compose himself for a moment, then lowered his hands and met the spirit’s eyes before the spirit could look away. “I want you to tell me the truth, mou hitori no boku. Tell me, what am I to you? Am I just your host?”
The spirit drew in a breath. “No, of course not. I cannot see you as just a host. Aibou…you are…my friend, my family…you are everything. You mean everything to me.”
“Exactly,” Yugi said, ignoring the flutter in his heart that the words caused. “So don’t you see? That’s how I feel about you. You aren’t another personality or a responsibility to me, you’re a person. You’re a friend. I could never…never regret you. I never want you to think that I could.”
“But…but your life-”
“I don’t want that normal life,” Yugi interrupted. “I made my choice to keep on this path with you. It’s human to wonder about what I gave up, but I knew what I was doing when I chose not to just disassemble the Puzzle and give up. I don’t regret it. You mean too much, you…”
You mean more than anything.
Even though he refrained from saying the words, he made no attempt to block the thought. Something in the spirit’s eyes gentled, and the corners of his lips tugged upwards.
“I understand,” he said softly.
X - X - X
Notes: Ah, the discussion-in-the-middle-of-the-night scene. I’ve done several, and I’m destined to write several more. It’s a staple of Puzzleshippers, I think.
Based on a scene from volume 10 of Silver Diamond. x3
The new Yugioh movie came out in Japan today. Rejoice!