(no subject)
First of all, my name is Paige and I'm 20. I have a fiance who is 24.
On January 25th, (my fiance's birthday) we found out that I was pregnant. It was an accident. I have many health problems and my doctor had taken me off my birth control pill because it was counteracting with my other meds and triggering my seizures and making them more violent. So, we did use protection and the condom didn't break or anything. Maybe the condom had a tiny hole in it or something? Not too sure. But it happened.
I didn't know at first how to feel about it. It just wasn't the right time. As soon as I found out that I was pregnant, I started having major problems. I got off all of my meds as soon as I found out I was pregnant and started taking vitamins just in case we were going to keep it. But a few days went by and with not being on my meds that I need to function...I was not doing well at all. I got to the point where I couldn't even move. Between my illnesses flaring up and the most intense cramps I've ever had in my life...I called my doctor that diagnosed my illnesses and he was so upset with the situation. He told me that most women who have what I have (Dysautonomia and other illnesses along with that) that they usually miscarry and there have been cases where the female doesn't make it through the pregnancy. On top of that, we found out my bloodtype is O Negative and that people with that blood type have difficulties with their pregnancies because your body sees the baby as a threat to the body and basically tries to rid it from your body causing miscarriages most of the time. So, all of the odds were against us. Plus, our financial situation is really horrible. If everything would've been perfect health-wise for me to go through with it, I don't think that we could've financially made it and I didn't want that to happen either.
So, my doctor said I had two choices: A) Stay in the hospital for nine months and risk my life and/or the baby's. B) Go to Planned Parenthood while it was still really early.
After hours of talking about it we finally decided on getting an abortion. We didn't want to but it really was the only choice. So, I was at peace with it.
I had gone to my family doctor to get blood tests done to see how far along I was and the hormone levels showed maybe 3 wks or 4 at the most. I was more at ease with that because I had done so much research about when the baby starts developing the brain and the heart and it hadn't started that yet at 3 wks or so.
Well, we get to Planned Parenthood and filled out a bunch of paperwork first. They took me and a bunch of other ladies back to this room where they played a film about abortion and showed the procedure and everything. We all had the choice of taking a pill which will basically make you miscarry at home but I don't think I could've done that. Plus, it's not 100% effective. And there's only a small chance with the vaccuum aspiration that they will leave anything in there. If that happens, when you come for your check up, they will see that and they'll get it out but that is rare.
Everyone had to talk to a counselor first. She just asked me a bunch of questions and made sure I was sure this was what I wanted to do and that nobody put me up to doing this. It didn't last too long at all.
Then, I went and got my finger pricked (I forget why they did that), got my blood pressure and temp taken. Afterwards, I had to go tinkle in a cup. Then, it was back to waiting in the room where the film was playing.
My name gets called again and this is it. They did an ultra-sound and found out I was 6 wks along. Looking at the ultra-sound did make me sad and I probably shouldn't have looked but it was a big circle and I was just filled with emotion. The nurse gave me a Rhogam (sp?) shot because of my bloodtype and it's good for a year. If I were to get pregnant I would have to get those shots every so often. Then, she gave me to Ativans to get me really relaxed. I really wanted to be put to sleep but they couldn't do that because the procedure is only 3-5 minutes. So, I go in there and get prepped and ready. I can't remember anything the doctor said or what he even looked like. There was a nurse there that was supposed to hold my hand but she left the room. But I was okay. When he started it did kind of hurt....like major cramps. I cried a little. The sound was hard to deal with for me. But it was over pretty fast and they take you to the recovery room.
The recovery room had recliners, heating pads, and blankets. They kept me there for about thirty minutes and told me to check my pad. They gave me some anti-biotics and some information papers on aftercare. And out the door I went.
For me, I was sad for a while. I still think about it and have my cries.
When I went for my check up, I got told some bad news. I have HPV and I had never been vaccinated against it so, she gave me some cream for the bumps and told me I had to make an appointment with an OBGYN. I haven't been to an OBGYN in years. Basically, because when I was younger, before I was sexually active, I had maybe two done and they both hurt me SO bad that I just never went back. So, long story short, they found out that my cervix is covered in dysplasia and it's borderline cancer. I had one surgery to get a lot of my cervix removed but I lost so much blood he couldn't get the rest of it. I have to wait atleast four months for that to heal and the stitches to dissolve so he can do another papsmear and do another surgery. We're hoping it doesn't turn into cancer but the rest of my cervix will have to be taken out I believe. Pretty much, I won't be able to have a baby unless my illnesses are ever cured and I won't have to be on so many meds. Plus, my OBGYN was talking about if this turns into cancer, they will have to do a more invasive hysterectomy where they take the uterus and certain parts of the vagina and so on.
So, it's been a crazy past few months but that is my abortion story. I hope some of that information will be helpful for those who have never got it done. I know everyone's experience is different. But if you have any questions or want to add me to your friends list, I would be glad to get to know you guys and make some friends who have been through this as well. I have felt alone because I don't know anyone who has had it done before and I haven't really talked to anyone about it outside of my parents and my fiance.
*also posted to abortioninfo*