#23 Vanadium- Chapter 1
Alright! It's November First, which means NaNoWriMo has just begun! Being me, I stayed up until midnight to crank out my wordcount for the day. It also means that I've used every spare moment to add a few more, but who really needs school anyway? :P Kidding, I'm actually starting homework right now. I just wanted to post this chapter first.
Also, heads up. I originally intended this story to be part of a series I want to write, but this story takes place before the others and contains strong language and expletives and mentions of sex. This is apparently not appropriate for anyone under high-school age, which was not my intention, but it's easier to write.
I you would like to read it anyway, click below.
Prologue
The first thing you should know is that he never set out to save the world. In fact, LArry Malloy wanted exactly the opposite. Ever since the time he was an elementary school science geek getting teased by the school bully (who happened to be more than twice his size), Larry wanted nothing more than to take over the world. The very notion of saving it had never crossed his mind.
Of course, that was before he became a middle school science teacher, and long before he became the president of the Knights of the Periodic Table. Nope, back in 2009 Larry Malloy had no idea what was in store for him. As far as he knew, he was going to bully his class full of college juniors seeking degrees in geology, fail a little less than half of them (but only because he would lose his job and thus his funding if he failed more than half the class... again...), and finish his 'Secret Device' to take over the world by the next presidential election. Oh, wouldn't that just be fun?
Nope. Larry had no idea. Instead, he walked into the classroom that fateful Septebeer morning just a little too full of himself.
CHAPTER ONE
The slamming of the door echoed loudly in the near empyt room. It was the first day of classes at the University, and Larry Malloy was Not Happy. Of all the days to have a six am class, it just had to be a Monday- the first day of classes no less!- and a group of freshmen. Was there any worse fate? Larry had not taught a freshman class since his first year working at The University, back before the Incident. Ever since then, the scheduling staff had learned that Larry and freshmen did not mix well. Not that he mixed well with any students, but the freshmen were easier to break than the seasoned juniors he usually taught and who had long since heard the horror stories. One of these horror stories told of a student who asked a stupid question before LArry ahd had a schance to finish his thrid cup of coffee. No one had seen him on campus since.
And so, it was this fateful norming that Larry stormed into the staff lounge to use the coffe pot because of all the days for his coffee maker to break, it just had to be thus one.
With a sneer on his face, Larry went about his morning coffee routine. He grabbed the pot and poured the gooey black liquid into his oversized mug, grimicing at the thought of drinking the gloop, but knowing that his caffeine addiction prevented him from turning up his noce. He then added a nice helping of creamer and more sugar than necessary (and twice as much as he normally used) just to make the goup halfway lpalateable. He slowly took a drink and swallowed befoer turning and leaving the room, coffee in hand, slouching all the way.
When he finally reached the classroom (which was not his typical small classroom holding 50 students only when doing a doubel lexture on a busy day) he looked dismally at the ldouble doors leading to the largest auditorium in the University. Behind these doors were hundreds of new, uncultured, immature freshman who were barely legal and were probably pimply faced pizza boys or dimwitted ditzy blondes here on Daddy's credit card. With a sigh, he threw open the doors and stalked inside, only to find that the deafening noise he had heard outside the room was not only louder inside the room, but also did not stop when the students saw him. Instead, it got louder as the imbeciles failed to be discreet as they pointed and laughed at the man they did not yet know was their professor.
By the time that LArry made it to the front of the room, the noise had died down somewhat, but he could still point out entire esections of the room he could not wait to decimate. He climbed up onto the platform and glared at the freshman, adding a little extra sneer if said so himself.
"Hello, and welcome to Geologoy 101." His voice was sharp and gravel-ly from dissuse, but it immediately silenced the room. "My name is Larry Malloy, and I have the misfortune of being your instructor in this course. You should know that I do not usually teach freshman- and there is a good reason for that. I will not be going easy on you just because this is your first year. In fact, I will run you into the ground. If you cannot handle it, then perhaps geology is not the career for you. Some of you, however," he added even more sneer as he snet a special glare toward the upper right-hand corner of the lecture hall, "baffle me as to how you were accepted into this college to start with. More than half of this class will drop out by the end of the first semester. Of those of you who remain, almost half of you will fail this class. If you wish to leave now, the registrar's office is expecting you and will either withdraw you from this course or transfer you to the other professor. You have ten seconds to leave."
"What the fuck is your problem, man?" A student in the front row bellowed.
"Excuse me- my problem?" Larry questioned, looking both offended and befuddled.
"Yeah, yours! Who the fuck are you to to tell us to either get out or fail? We're not paying twenty grand a year to fail, you dick!" The guy (who looked like he might be a new recruit for the freshman football team, with his bulky muscles, blond hair and careless air) spat at LArry.
"I am your professor, with a higher degree than you can ever hope to achieve, and more experience with who is actually capable of surviving college. Obviously, you are not one of those people."
"You fuck! How the hell do you keep your job, you damned rude bastard!"
"I keep my job by not letting loose whatever expletive strikes my fancy!"
"Yeah? Well it must be pretty fancy, eh? What was your last boyfriend's name?" The jock mocked.
"My sexual preferences are none of your concern, Mr. High School Footbal Star, not that that obscene rumor holds any grain of truth." Larry's eyes narrowed, and his glare sharpened its focus from all members of the freshman class to just Mr. High School Football Star.
"Of course not, you wouldn't want the other favulty to know you like sleeping with otherm en, would you? Or maybe you prefre your men younger than you, and that's why they won't let you teach the freshman anymore- because you like to fuck students and the half that fail are the half that refuse to climb into your bed!" Mr. High School Football Star accused hotly. Before he could add to this highly volatile accusation, he was screaming bloody murder and grasping in shock at the ballpoint pen now lodged in his left bicep. Taking this pause in Mr. High School Football Start's rant, Larry calmly stalked over to him and grabbed him by the collar.
"Listen hear you little punk, I have no desire to fuck you or your little friends. I am not allowed to teach freshman because I have a very short temper and teaching geology means that I never have any shortage of rocks on hand. As you've just seen by that ballpoint pen in your arm, I may be a science geek but I am a dead accurate shot- imagine what I oculd have done with a rock. Now get your sorry ass out of my classroom before I inflict another wound that will lose you function of your entire left arm permanently- if you don't bleed to death first, that is." Although no student more than ten feet from Larry could hear what he said to the quivering freshman football player, no one missed the icy chill that seemed to sweep the room as he hissed his threat at the boy. By the time Larry let go of him, nearly half of the students had left and the other half were fighting over who could squeaze out of the room first.
"My father will hear about this!" Mr. High School Football Star Shouted as he stumbled out of the room.
"I have no doubt he will," Larry smiled to himself as he meandered over to the desk. He sat down and took a large gulp of the sludge that hardly passed for coffer and grinned. "I wonder if his dad can knock this class off my schedule... that'd be nice."
Also, heads up. I originally intended this story to be part of a series I want to write, but this story takes place before the others and contains strong language and expletives and mentions of sex. This is apparently not appropriate for anyone under high-school age, which was not my intention, but it's easier to write.
I you would like to read it anyway, click below.
Prologue
The first thing you should know is that he never set out to save the world. In fact, LArry Malloy wanted exactly the opposite. Ever since the time he was an elementary school science geek getting teased by the school bully (who happened to be more than twice his size), Larry wanted nothing more than to take over the world. The very notion of saving it had never crossed his mind.
Of course, that was before he became a middle school science teacher, and long before he became the president of the Knights of the Periodic Table. Nope, back in 2009 Larry Malloy had no idea what was in store for him. As far as he knew, he was going to bully his class full of college juniors seeking degrees in geology, fail a little less than half of them (but only because he would lose his job and thus his funding if he failed more than half the class... again...), and finish his 'Secret Device' to take over the world by the next presidential election. Oh, wouldn't that just be fun?
Nope. Larry had no idea. Instead, he walked into the classroom that fateful Septebeer morning just a little too full of himself.
CHAPTER ONE
The slamming of the door echoed loudly in the near empyt room. It was the first day of classes at the University, and Larry Malloy was Not Happy. Of all the days to have a six am class, it just had to be a Monday- the first day of classes no less!- and a group of freshmen. Was there any worse fate? Larry had not taught a freshman class since his first year working at The University, back before the Incident. Ever since then, the scheduling staff had learned that Larry and freshmen did not mix well. Not that he mixed well with any students, but the freshmen were easier to break than the seasoned juniors he usually taught and who had long since heard the horror stories. One of these horror stories told of a student who asked a stupid question before LArry ahd had a schance to finish his thrid cup of coffee. No one had seen him on campus since.
And so, it was this fateful norming that Larry stormed into the staff lounge to use the coffe pot because of all the days for his coffee maker to break, it just had to be thus one.
With a sneer on his face, Larry went about his morning coffee routine. He grabbed the pot and poured the gooey black liquid into his oversized mug, grimicing at the thought of drinking the gloop, but knowing that his caffeine addiction prevented him from turning up his noce. He then added a nice helping of creamer and more sugar than necessary (and twice as much as he normally used) just to make the goup halfway lpalateable. He slowly took a drink and swallowed befoer turning and leaving the room, coffee in hand, slouching all the way.
When he finally reached the classroom (which was not his typical small classroom holding 50 students only when doing a doubel lexture on a busy day) he looked dismally at the ldouble doors leading to the largest auditorium in the University. Behind these doors were hundreds of new, uncultured, immature freshman who were barely legal and were probably pimply faced pizza boys or dimwitted ditzy blondes here on Daddy's credit card. With a sigh, he threw open the doors and stalked inside, only to find that the deafening noise he had heard outside the room was not only louder inside the room, but also did not stop when the students saw him. Instead, it got louder as the imbeciles failed to be discreet as they pointed and laughed at the man they did not yet know was their professor.
By the time that LArry made it to the front of the room, the noise had died down somewhat, but he could still point out entire esections of the room he could not wait to decimate. He climbed up onto the platform and glared at the freshman, adding a little extra sneer if said so himself.
"Hello, and welcome to Geologoy 101." His voice was sharp and gravel-ly from dissuse, but it immediately silenced the room. "My name is Larry Malloy, and I have the misfortune of being your instructor in this course. You should know that I do not usually teach freshman- and there is a good reason for that. I will not be going easy on you just because this is your first year. In fact, I will run you into the ground. If you cannot handle it, then perhaps geology is not the career for you. Some of you, however," he added even more sneer as he snet a special glare toward the upper right-hand corner of the lecture hall, "baffle me as to how you were accepted into this college to start with. More than half of this class will drop out by the end of the first semester. Of those of you who remain, almost half of you will fail this class. If you wish to leave now, the registrar's office is expecting you and will either withdraw you from this course or transfer you to the other professor. You have ten seconds to leave."
"What the fuck is your problem, man?" A student in the front row bellowed.
"Excuse me- my problem?" Larry questioned, looking both offended and befuddled.
"Yeah, yours! Who the fuck are you to to tell us to either get out or fail? We're not paying twenty grand a year to fail, you dick!" The guy (who looked like he might be a new recruit for the freshman football team, with his bulky muscles, blond hair and careless air) spat at LArry.
"I am your professor, with a higher degree than you can ever hope to achieve, and more experience with who is actually capable of surviving college. Obviously, you are not one of those people."
"You fuck! How the hell do you keep your job, you damned rude bastard!"
"I keep my job by not letting loose whatever expletive strikes my fancy!"
"Yeah? Well it must be pretty fancy, eh? What was your last boyfriend's name?" The jock mocked.
"My sexual preferences are none of your concern, Mr. High School Footbal Star, not that that obscene rumor holds any grain of truth." Larry's eyes narrowed, and his glare sharpened its focus from all members of the freshman class to just Mr. High School Football Star.
"Of course not, you wouldn't want the other favulty to know you like sleeping with otherm en, would you? Or maybe you prefre your men younger than you, and that's why they won't let you teach the freshman anymore- because you like to fuck students and the half that fail are the half that refuse to climb into your bed!" Mr. High School Football Star accused hotly. Before he could add to this highly volatile accusation, he was screaming bloody murder and grasping in shock at the ballpoint pen now lodged in his left bicep. Taking this pause in Mr. High School Football Start's rant, Larry calmly stalked over to him and grabbed him by the collar.
"Listen hear you little punk, I have no desire to fuck you or your little friends. I am not allowed to teach freshman because I have a very short temper and teaching geology means that I never have any shortage of rocks on hand. As you've just seen by that ballpoint pen in your arm, I may be a science geek but I am a dead accurate shot- imagine what I oculd have done with a rock. Now get your sorry ass out of my classroom before I inflict another wound that will lose you function of your entire left arm permanently- if you don't bleed to death first, that is." Although no student more than ten feet from Larry could hear what he said to the quivering freshman football player, no one missed the icy chill that seemed to sweep the room as he hissed his threat at the boy. By the time Larry let go of him, nearly half of the students had left and the other half were fighting over who could squeaze out of the room first.
"My father will hear about this!" Mr. High School Football Star Shouted as he stumbled out of the room.
"I have no doubt he will," Larry smiled to himself as he meandered over to the desk. He sat down and took a large gulp of the sludge that hardly passed for coffer and grinned. "I wonder if his dad can knock this class off my schedule... that'd be nice."