My new best friend

[adamvdb]

Today my mother bought a lawn gnome, you know, like the one in the travelocity commercials. His rugged beard and pointed hat make me quiver in anticipation.I took him to my room and tried to get him to loosen up by serving some chamomile tea and reading my poetry on the love i have yet to find. (see previous entry) Then i tried to stick him up my

Comments

you are a loser

[anonymous]

wow no wonder you have no friends, you are creepy as hell. They should call you Adam VanderStink

I miss You

[anonymous]

Adam, why haven’t you visited me lately? I miss the feeling of your smooth rectal interior wall around my pointed red hat. Please Adam, although you have deemed massive amounts of herpes on my mouth, I miss hearing your soft whimpers and your poetry. You are lonely…so am I.

Love always,
The Lawn Gnome