the importance of insignifigance

[acetaline]

So, i realized this weekend that it is important to have friends whom you dont see often. I hung out with a few of my friends from when i went to Harrison who i hadn't seen for like a month and a half. and i made a decision. i dont know how many of you remember what i was like 3-4 years ago, but to put it in an easy to understand fashion i was apathetic and disconnected. i was not any happier then, but i didnt feel the pain. i didnt feel anything. and i've decided that i want to feel that way again to an extent. I dont need her, and im tired of "the situation" so i am going to just be a vegetable. follow a daily routine. school, home, job when i get one. and whatever i am invited to or things like that. no more calling everyone so that i don't have to be at home. i will endure my house, i will move on, i will get over it.

"Feel me now"

Suffer.
Pain recedes,
torturous love will rot as we lie in dismay of occurances out of our own hands.
Things we cannot control or change.
Changes in ourselves
Revamped
A new layer
A new era
Done for pain.
More for less
Positions change
As power shifts
Self is nothing
As are you
Insignifigant,
Unimportant,
Nothing.
But still....
Everything runs together
A bloody mess of mixed emotion
A knowingly wrong decision
But an outcome half-desired.
Come to me in time
In space
In future
And then.
Then.

funny, that actually wasnt supposed to be a poem, more of an insult? [it was only going to say "Suffer"] but i elaborated and it flowed.