Finally reading the Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants, and I can't put it down....
I wish I were like Bridget; direct, tall and gorgeous, long-haired and completely captivating. Easily seductive and reckless to the point where I had to be to make me feel whole. Passionately in-tune with the earth and my surroundings, but intaking them the way I wanted to. Even down to the obsession and intensity for soccer I always wish I had. I guess you need to be in Baja to experience this, and I don't even know if that's a real place, but I already crave to be there, floating along just existing with the ocean and sleeping on the beach. Having the moon sit on my shoulder and riding so fast, I never looked back. I don't feel as my own lately, even though I've been at a spiritual peek with all of my beliefs and ideas and theorys coinciding with everything I say. I lust after a place to flaunt them and then after I say it, I feel ashamed, as if I'm not just here, living, I'm somewhere else, watching things go by, as well as my life and someone spewing out the things I slowly recognize. I do not understand this. I mope around for hours on end and all I can describe it as is getting lost in that book and wanting to be her, wanting to be there, with Eric and with no one else. I don't understand, and I've come to base my life around understanding and accepting. I can't remember my dreams so I can't listen to what they are trying to tell me. I wish I were captivating.