your personality is like battery acid.

[_kiss_me_hardd]

i wouldn't want you to want to be wanted by me
i wouldn't want you to worry you'd be drowned within my sea
i only wanted to be wonderful and wonderful is true
in truth i only really wanted to be wanted by you.

i can't understand how a person just wakes up one morning and goes, "hmmm, nope, don't like her anymore."
that's fucked up and you know it.  i don't care if it's the truth or not, it's fucking bullshit.  fuck you.
it wasn't supposed to end this way.
"oh no, it doesn't matter because i don't actually like him anyway so i can get what i need and not even get hurt."
yea, fuck that.

"well after you said you said we weren't gonna go out i just thought of you as a friend that i hooked up with."
fuck you.  fuck you, you filthy piece of trash.

and the thing is, i wouldn't have done it if i had known all of that.  i wouldn't have done it if i hadn't liked you.  i wouldn't have done it if i hadn't cared about you.

so began the beginning of my first regret.

never in my life have i regreted anything...nothing.  but i regret this.  and i regret ever liking you.

and there were others.  there were so many others who wanted to be with me.  and i chose you because i felt that you were the only one who genuinely gave a damn.  but i was wrong; clearly i was wrong.

i can't do this.  i can't do any of this.
i can't do this moving bullshit.
and i can't do this college bullshit.
and i can't do this leaving my friends bullshit.
i am incapable and unintelligent.
i am too ugly and too fat.
i disgust myself and those around me.

your personality is like battery acid.
and maybe that was really just me all along.

and i needed you tonight, but of course you weren't there.  where are you?

here comes that cold day in july...