Dec 01, 2007 13:27
In about nineteen days I will leave New York for a long time. In about a month I will move to London for a long time. Life is suddenly becoming very real and moving very fast. Where did everything go? I'm in school paying probably too much for my education and I'm not too sure what I am going to do with it after I'm done. I go to a school that I have mixed feelings about and that probably will not change before I graduate. I don't really know what I will do with my life or where I will be in the future.
I often wonder if I am living up to my potential. People used to tell me that I would thrive in college and that it would be the best place for me and I would have the time of my life. Now that I'm here I wonder, how much of that is true? I love being in New York and I love my friends. Yet, I still question things. Am I doing as well in school as I could be? Am I as good of a friend as I could be? What am I doing with my life? I used to just say I have plenty of time to figure that out, but now I'm getting older and my life is getting more and more real by the day and I need to start to figure things out.
I've always said that I'm going to be a teacher and I'm still ok with that, but I don't want to do that now. I'm still young and I still have so many things that I feel like I need to do before I start teaching people about how to live their lives and be strong people. What will I do between college and career? I want to start teaching when I'm experienced enough, which I'm hoping will be by the age of thirty. Between now and then who knows? I want to go places, which I'm starting in a month, and do so many things. I want to live many places with many jobs. I want to meet a lot of people. I want to live life to the highest potential.
Basically I'm scared to death of my life and ready for it at the same time. Things are about to get very hectic and I'm excited.