only when we get to see the arial view

[__sidekick]

here's the deal: i can't be friends with gus. after some serious reflection and analysis it's obvious that he is not good for me. in any way. he's still completely unable to deal with this, and so am i. it makes me upset to see him, it makes me upset to talk to him, it makes me upset to not talk to him or see him. he is still copping out of answering questions and avoids telling me anything. it's unhealthy, and i need to move the fuck on. so my plan is as follows: he said he wanted to go to coffee, so we're going to go to coffee. i'm going to tell him i don't want to be friends with him, and that will be that. to be honest i've never wanted to be his friend, i wanted to be his girlfriend and i thought being his "friend" would increase the likelihood of that happening again, which is a horrible hope to carry around when it's completely unrealistic. i guess in a sick way i also wanted him to have a reminder of what he threw away. but the problem with that logic is that he doesn't care. he knows exactly what he threw away and he doesn't care.
so, i'm going to remove him from my life in any way that i can, because i need to do what's best for me. i spent a long time doing what was best for him and it got me nowhere.

p.s. does anyone have jordan(from patience please)'s number? i think i owe him a thank you.