(no subject)
i am alive. i just needed to take a break from livejournal, i guess, and i don't know how often i'll be posting now, but i am still here. not much is new..
brian and i are still broken up. he realized that the reasons he didn't know are actually that he doesn't know if i'm mature enough or ready to be in the kind of relationship he wants to be in. i disagree but its his decision to make. we're sort of in a dating phase, where he calls me to talk and we go out sometimes and things. he wants to take it slow to make sure he doesn't make a mistake and have to break up with me again. and i'm pretty okay with the whole thing actually.. my emotions have seemed to de-intensify and i don't know. to be honest, it wouldn't be so bad if he decided not to get back together. though i say that now and who knows, but still.
in the meantime, i've met two guys that i like, which also poses a problem. the first guy's name is matt. i met him at the bowling alley because he's on one of the teams in our league and brian hates him because i gave my number to him in front of brian to make brian jealous, even though i wasn't going to do anything (yes it was stupid, i know). i've been talking to him more though and i like him, which sucks because last week bowling was super awkward and blah. the other guy is tom. he's 24 and a friend of heather's. i met him the other night when we all went out and he's nice and gentlemanly and he smells really good. so does matt so i guess that's beside the point but still.
i went on vacation to myrtle beach with my mom from the 3rd-10th. it was a lot of fun, as it always was, but something was kind of missing this time. i don't know how to explain it and i certainly had a good time, but it wasn't like the years before. here are some pictures if you want to see. :)
still working full-time at payless. still hating it. keep looking for a new job, but it's so hard to find with the economy. i'm trying to get a job at petco as a pet groomer, but idek. every time i call or stop in to check on my application, the manager is busy. ;/
i actually feel pleased with my friends life. it's hard for me to make actual friends that i can hang out and talk to, and i've found some, and it pleases me. i've been going over to katie and ross' a lot and hanging out with heather and it is really really nice. and a new girl started at work, janelle, and we're quickly becoming good friends, so i'm very happy about it. i finally feel comfortable with that aspect of my life, not like the awkward teenager anymore.
i got myself a car! it's nothing fancy -- a 2002 light blue saturn SL2. it's smaller than the other one and its newer. it is nice. i like having my own wheels, especially when i am drinking and driving, lol.
i think that's it. idk. i'll be around i suppose, just wanted to update everyone on my life in case you wanted to know. =) i miss you guys. let me know how it's been going, even though i've read most of your journals on a regular basis! ♥
brian and i are still broken up. he realized that the reasons he didn't know are actually that he doesn't know if i'm mature enough or ready to be in the kind of relationship he wants to be in. i disagree but its his decision to make. we're sort of in a dating phase, where he calls me to talk and we go out sometimes and things. he wants to take it slow to make sure he doesn't make a mistake and have to break up with me again. and i'm pretty okay with the whole thing actually.. my emotions have seemed to de-intensify and i don't know. to be honest, it wouldn't be so bad if he decided not to get back together. though i say that now and who knows, but still.
in the meantime, i've met two guys that i like, which also poses a problem. the first guy's name is matt. i met him at the bowling alley because he's on one of the teams in our league and brian hates him because i gave my number to him in front of brian to make brian jealous, even though i wasn't going to do anything (yes it was stupid, i know). i've been talking to him more though and i like him, which sucks because last week bowling was super awkward and blah. the other guy is tom. he's 24 and a friend of heather's. i met him the other night when we all went out and he's nice and gentlemanly and he smells really good. so does matt so i guess that's beside the point but still.
i went on vacation to myrtle beach with my mom from the 3rd-10th. it was a lot of fun, as it always was, but something was kind of missing this time. i don't know how to explain it and i certainly had a good time, but it wasn't like the years before. here are some pictures if you want to see. :)
still working full-time at payless. still hating it. keep looking for a new job, but it's so hard to find with the economy. i'm trying to get a job at petco as a pet groomer, but idek. every time i call or stop in to check on my application, the manager is busy. ;/
i actually feel pleased with my friends life. it's hard for me to make actual friends that i can hang out and talk to, and i've found some, and it pleases me. i've been going over to katie and ross' a lot and hanging out with heather and it is really really nice. and a new girl started at work, janelle, and we're quickly becoming good friends, so i'm very happy about it. i finally feel comfortable with that aspect of my life, not like the awkward teenager anymore.
i got myself a car! it's nothing fancy -- a 2002 light blue saturn SL2. it's smaller than the other one and its newer. it is nice. i like having my own wheels, especially when i am drinking and driving, lol.
i think that's it. idk. i'll be around i suppose, just wanted to update everyone on my life in case you wanted to know. =) i miss you guys. let me know how it's been going, even though i've read most of your journals on a regular basis! ♥