Sucky week sucks
Just got back from the hospital where I was visiting my father. He's been admitted to the mental health ward while we try to sort out whether his current erratic (and occasionally aggressive) behaviour is a physiological or psychological thing. Or maybe some combination of both.
He was admitted last Thursday night, and we still haven't actually met with his doctor, nor have we seen the results of the CT scan they took that night (he had a stroke back in January and there's the possibility of another bleed in the brain).
He spent the first few days absolutely furious with us for sending him to the hospital, alternately ordering us out of his room or ordering us to call the media so he could report how badly he was being treated. That fury, however, has been replaced by muddled confusion. I'm not sure which state I find more distressing.
Ok, that's a lie. As upsetting as it is to see him so disoriented, it was more upsetting to have him tell me that he never wanted to see me again. I know that he was just speaking out of anger and frustration, but it made me wonder if I was ever going to get to speak to my dad again - the dad I used to know.
The only good thing in all of this is how amazingly kind and helpful people have been:
- sesheta_66 and nursedarry, who picked up my issues of the Prophet on short notice
- the ambulance drivers who came to get my dad on Thursday night and managed to coax him into going to the hospital without having to restrain him (one of whom was also very fit. Is it inappropriate to notice hot EMTs when you're having a family crisis?)
- the nurse-practitioner who saw my dad at the hospital and understood that he needed to be admitted so that both he and my mom could be safe
- my friends, who have rearranged their lives to suit my needs and have alternately listened to me and distracted me
- my boss, coworkers and staff, who have all made it clear that work is a distant second place to looking after my dad and my mom (and myself)
I am also excessively grateful about the fact that one of my best friends lives directly across the street from the hospital and I have free use of his extra parking space. It's a small thing, but not having to find change to feed parking meters or drive around looking for a parking spot helps me be just a bit less stressed before I go to see dad and that doesn't feel like a small thing at all.
Dad's supposed to be seeing his doctor tomorrow. He needs to be re-certified (since he's in there against his will), and we're a bit concerned about what happens next. There's no way he can be at home alone with my mom right now. I feel like a shit for hoping that my father continues to be detained in the mental health ward but I really can't see what other option is available.
I'm pretty sure this is not going to be my favourite Christmas ever.
He was admitted last Thursday night, and we still haven't actually met with his doctor, nor have we seen the results of the CT scan they took that night (he had a stroke back in January and there's the possibility of another bleed in the brain).
He spent the first few days absolutely furious with us for sending him to the hospital, alternately ordering us out of his room or ordering us to call the media so he could report how badly he was being treated. That fury, however, has been replaced by muddled confusion. I'm not sure which state I find more distressing.
Ok, that's a lie. As upsetting as it is to see him so disoriented, it was more upsetting to have him tell me that he never wanted to see me again. I know that he was just speaking out of anger and frustration, but it made me wonder if I was ever going to get to speak to my dad again - the dad I used to know.
The only good thing in all of this is how amazingly kind and helpful people have been:
- sesheta_66 and nursedarry, who picked up my issues of the Prophet on short notice
- the ambulance drivers who came to get my dad on Thursday night and managed to coax him into going to the hospital without having to restrain him (one of whom was also very fit. Is it inappropriate to notice hot EMTs when you're having a family crisis?)
- the nurse-practitioner who saw my dad at the hospital and understood that he needed to be admitted so that both he and my mom could be safe
- my friends, who have rearranged their lives to suit my needs and have alternately listened to me and distracted me
- my boss, coworkers and staff, who have all made it clear that work is a distant second place to looking after my dad and my mom (and myself)
I am also excessively grateful about the fact that one of my best friends lives directly across the street from the hospital and I have free use of his extra parking space. It's a small thing, but not having to find change to feed parking meters or drive around looking for a parking spot helps me be just a bit less stressed before I go to see dad and that doesn't feel like a small thing at all.
Dad's supposed to be seeing his doctor tomorrow. He needs to be re-certified (since he's in there against his will), and we're a bit concerned about what happens next. There's no way he can be at home alone with my mom right now. I feel like a shit for hoping that my father continues to be detained in the mental health ward but I really can't see what other option is available.
I'm pretty sure this is not going to be my favourite Christmas ever.